First Grader Writes Adorable Poem About Personal Space

In addition to being National Humor Month, National Pecan Month, and Stress Awareness Month, April has been designated as National Poetry Month. And now that the dust from all of the raging monthlong poem-battles has settled, it seems that Poetry has a new champion — a six-year-old from the Lower East Side of… » 4/30/14 4:40pm 4/30/14 4:40pm

Dad's Passionate Poem: 'To the Boys Who May One Day Date My Daughter'

A video of Jesse Parent performing at a poetry slam is being passed around this week. In the clip, the tattooed, scowling writer recites, "To the boys who may one day date my daughter: I have been waiting for you. Since before her birth, since before my spark* took hold and ignited the fire in her mother's belly, I… » 4/18/14 1:40pm 4/18/14 1:40pm

Nebraska Won't Let Kid Read Macklemore Lyrics on TV, Shitstorm Ensues

Every year, the winners of Nebraska's state high school speech and drama competition are invited to perform their winning material on public TV. But this year, they're running things a little differently. One of the winners in the poetry category, you see, made the mistake of choosing "controversial" material that… » 4/02/14 6:10pm 4/02/14 6:10pm

This Health Scare Article from TIME Is Full of Unfortunate Haikus

When a reader sends a particularly poetic message to the Jezebel inbox, some of the writers will notice the message's linguistic symmetry and gleefully announce, "Haiku!" Truthfully, most of these messages aren't perfect haikus (or "hokkus" for all those Ezra Pound fascists lurking in the comments), but they are very… » 2/23/14 2:00pm 2/23/14 2:00pm

Great News, Citizens of Lesbos! Two New Sappho Poems Found

Attention, luxuriant Graces and beautiful-haired Muses! Scholars have confirmed that they've found two heretofore undiscovered poems by the 7th-century-BC master Sappho. In case you haven't studied your Classics (and/or you never had that one asshole cousin who snorted "LOL UR FROM LESBOS" at every opportunity),… » 1/30/14 7:45pm 1/30/14 7:45pm

Watch Nikki Giovanni Perform 'Ego Tripping' on Melissa Harris-Perry

While promoting her new book "Chasing Utopia: A Hybrid," poet Nikki Giovanni blessed MSNBC's "Melissa Harris-Perry" show on Sunday with a live performance of her poem, "Ego Tripping." I screamed when I saw this clip, because Giovanni is an American treasure who really does have "Thug Life" tattooed on her arm — yes,… » 12/16/13 3:45pm 12/16/13 3:45pm

The Most Poetic Police Report You'll Ever Read

On a recent late summer day, the cops were called during a fight between two 22-year-old women in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. The ladies were cited for disorderly conduct. Officer William Heine filed what The Smoking Gun is calling a "succinct" report, adding: "While not exactly a haiku, Heine’s 16-word narrative… » 9/23/13 4:05pm 9/23/13 4:05pm

I Read the Bachelorette Winner's Book of 'Poetry' So You Don't Have To

The Bachelorette is a television show in which they lock a rag-tag band of mostly white hotties in a house and force them to compete over the heart of a woman. To do so, the captive hotties utilize muscles, tongue-kissing, and generic combinations of the phrases "looking for a real relationship," "family really… » 8/30/13 12:30pm 8/30/13 12:30pm

New Jersey Mayor Wrote Hilariously Unromantic Poetry to Mistress

East Orange Mayor Robert Bowser is currently the subject of a discrimination suit that stems from a long-term extramarital affair he was having with his research assistant. But things weren't always so bleak for the high-minded Bowser. During the affair, he would write the assistant, Corletta Hicks, romantic poetry… » 5/05/13 1:50pm 5/05/13 1:50pm

Journaling About Your Breakup Just Makes It Even Worse

Take that, therapists: journaling after a breakup makes it harder to move on, according to a new study. Researchers at the University of Arizona thought that particularly "ruminative" patients could benefit from writing out all of their feelings in explicit detail like a 14-year-old LiveJournal poet. (More on those… » 11/30/12 11:05am 11/30/12 11:05am

How Long Can You Listen to this Men's Rights Anthem Before You Tear…

God, you guys, you know what sucks? How men are responsible for all human achievement (except, uh, actually making other humans) and women just shit all over them. But now, thankfully, the Men's Rights movement has found a musical prophet fit to deliver the message that men are fed up with the rampant abuse from the… » 4/16/12 4:00pm 4/16/12 4:00pm