It's hard to be a passive-aggressive person in an age of waning face-to-face communication, all but robbed of the microexpressions you need to make people feel bad without actually saying anything. Thank goodness our old dotty end of sentence friend the period is here to help.
About a month and a half ago, after years of relentless Blackberry mockery from my plugged in coworkers, I did something pretty out of my typically Luddite character: I bought a smartphone. And so far, I like it just fine. I can listen to Spotify on my phone now, which is nice. And the picture quality is much better…
One of the world's greatest, most enduring mysteries has finally been solved. No, we haven't figured out what Stonehenge is for, how the pyramids were built, who really killed JFK, what caused the Bloop, the identity of the man in the Taman Shud case, or why Jennifer Aniston keeps getting roles in major studio films —…
Make sure to disinfect your hands by removing the first three layers of epidermis and then soaking them in bleach for ten minutes after you send your next text. Because, seriously, your hands are fucking disgusting and your precious iPhone is a germ magnet.
If you've ever found yourself grinding your molars because the person sitting next to you in a coffee shop was gabbing away on a cellphone about the previous night's bout of food poisoning from a vending machine chili dog, you no doubt wished that you had laser eyes so you could melt that person into a puddle of sticky …
Today is the 20th anniversary of the first text message. Should we be afraid of what's next? No way. Texting doesn't replace conversation with connection; it enhances it. I love texting, and you'd have to pry my phone from my cold, dead hands to get me to stop typing out my feelings. (And I'd probably still figure out…
Watching your phone battery disappear as you're out and about running errands is a modern inconvenience, but an inconvenience all the same. You are an important person with places to go and calls to make! You have business to attend to or, at the very least, you would like to text your friend a photo of the guy you…
If people don't stop seriously injuring themselves because they're walking in a crowded city with their eyes trained on the latest cat-and-monkey-become-best-friends-and-steal-a-shopping-cart video, then some lawmaker is going to sense that there's an easy way to start generating revenue by having police issue…
Adults these days! According to a new survey, Americans report that they'd find it more stressful to lose their phone than they would to lose their wedding ring, because one is a symbol of an everlasting commitment and the other is just a chintzy piece of jewelry some priest said magic over.
Siri can be used for many purposes — from telling Zooey Deschanel that when water falls from the sky, that's called "rain" to claiming she doesn't know who Samuel L. Jackson is (seriously! Ask her! She'll lie!) But did you know that Siri can also be a malevolent entity worthy of her own series of R. L. Stein books?
Florida House Rep. Richard Steinberg is under federal investigation for his inappropriate, bumbling attempt to woo a married attorney via a series of terribly unsexy — and unsolicited — sexts. How is it that in this day and age, grown-ass adults are still incapable of sending a decent sext? It's not that difficult.
Watch out, teenagers! New market research shows baby boomers know how to use smartphones just like you do. What will they learn next?
People have been joking for year that women will do whatever Oprah tells us to, but recently this has been thoroughly disproven. Mercifully, sequined Uggs never became America's "favorite thing," we refused en masse to even locate the OWN Network on our cable lineup, and now, despite Oprah's demand that we only text on…
Celina Aarons has two brothers who are deaf and unable to speak, and she communicates with both of them using primarily text messages. Because one of them is in college full time and don't have a job, she added him to her cellular plan. And because that brother of hers went off to Canada, she should've made sure that…
Here's some information that will fuel your paranoia: According to a survey by the Pew Internet & American Life Project, 30% of adults ages 18 to 29 have pretended to be using their cell phone to avoid human interaction. 42% of adults in that age range also said that had trouble completing a task if their phone wasn't…
We all know people can't bear to be separated from their precious smartphones, but a new poll set out to discover exactly how much we love them. Would you give up basic necessities to keep your phone? Reject romantic partners who can't understand your passion for the phone? Bite off a dude's finger when he tries to…
Do women need their own cell phones? The makers of the HTC Bliss Verizon Android phone think so, according to tech site This Is My Next. Does it come with yogurt?
I wish my grandmother could see my baby cousin, and meet my fiance. I wish she could enjoy Michelle Obama's clothes. But most of all, I wish my grandmother had lived to enjoy texting. Allow me to explain:
Hulu has a series of videos called "Howcasts" instructing viewers how to, say, "Make Snow Angels" or "Untangle Necklaces." They've just posted a new one called "How to Get Him to Call You," and it's as silly as it sounds.
