With Americans increasingly skeptical of high-fructose corn syrup and artificial sweeteners alike, what's a soda company to do? Well, Pepsi and Coke both want to sell us on new "natural" drinks made with sugar stevia, instead. Don't you feel better about those liquid calories?

Even though a health risk has never been found before, the FDA is conducting a study regarding the safety of caramel coloring. You know, the stuff in Coke, Diet Coke, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, Root Beer and Brisk iced tea. Uh oh.

Look, I'm not stupid enough to believe that Beyoncé drinks soda, but I do believe that she can, sorceress-like, conjure doppelgängers of herself to dance with and shatter a room full of mirrors with one whip of her hair. No question.

If you're one of those people who loves Diet Pepsi because of the smooth, unadulterated taste of pure aspartame, I've got some bad news for you. Consider your shit adulterated. The Pepsi corporation will now be sweetening its weird brown water substitute with a combination of aspartame and delicious acesulfame…

Oh, man, wouldn't it be great to glug unlimited Pepsi AND get your fats blocked!?!? Well, the good folks at Pepsi-Cola Japan are introducing a new product for just that purpose—a refreshing cola beverage that "blocks" your "fats" with "fiber," just like Gandalf on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm. "Pepsi Special" contains an…

In an effort to educate consumers about the stark realities of carbonated syrup, soda giants are rolling out new vending machines that will prominently feature calorie counts. Coke, Pepsi, and Dr. Pepper will all launch their new machines in 2013, and also plan to focus aggressively on developing new diet drinks.

Let's take a moment today to salute a brave American hero. A man who saw through the amoral haze of today's society and who had the courage to stand up for what's right, even in the face of an unstoppable tide of modernity and vice. That man is Oklahoma legislator Ralph Shortey. And that fearless act of bravery was…

A growing body of evidence indicates that there's a reason it's so hard for so many people to just stop eating junk food— it's just as addictive as illegal drugs. This changes everything. Chocoholism is real, and it's no laughing matter, Cathy cartoons. All those songs you thought were coded odes to heroin and…

[Palm Desert, November 18. Image via Pacific Coast News Online.]

Pepsi CEO Indra Nooyi on fighting for equality for women in business: "Sixty, seventy percent of what I'm speaking on has something to do with women's issues... But if I don't do it, who's going to do it?" [Forbes]

Oh, dear. A columnist for the Reflector, the online newspaper of Mississippi State University, doesn't believe that the Pepsi "AMP Up Before You Score" application is sexist, as "there's virtually no guy out there who genuinely believes women are objects."

The world may never know. Nostalgia: the last refuge of a scoundrel.

Barack Obama may be frustrated with how his economic stimulus plans are proceeding, but hey, join the club: Everyone in Washington right now has something to be frustrated about.

TMZ has more evidence that Pepsi (which owns Tropicana) is co-opting Obama imagery for its own purposes. At least it's less obnoxious than Pepsi's "Hope" signs all over DC. [TMZ, DCist]

• Squee! This baby deer, delivered via c-section after its mother was hit by a car is officially The Cutest Thing, Ever. • Speaking of C-sections, a new study has found that pregnant Asian women whose male partners are Caucasian are more likely to have a Cesarean than white women who have Asian or white male…