In today's edition of Tweet Beat, Paris Hilton experiences a waking nightmare :(, Ryan Lochte gets frustrated with toddlers that are probably smarter than him, and T-Pain might be more glasses obsessed than Elton John.
While You Were Sleeping Cory Monteith Checked Into Rehab (Again)
Glee star and "Frankenteen" Cory Monteith, who's previously been open about his troubled past as a delinquent teenager, has checked into rehab for substance abuse. His rep confirms to People: "[Monteith] has voluntarily admitted himself to a treatment facility for substance addiction [...] He graciously asks for your…
Jennifer Lawrence Denounces Unflattering Paparazzi Pic: 'That's Not My…
Like that candy corn in the crack of your sofa cushions, the movie Cool Runnings or the actor Michael Caine, this is slightly old and yet important: When Jennifer Lawrence sat down with David Letterman Thursday, he procured a paparazzi photo of her in a bikini so that she could "answer" for her saggy butt. JLaw…
Harry Styles Dumped Taylor Swift Because She's an Asexual Antiques…
A probably fake, albeit hilarious new report has emerged that Harry Styles dumped Taylor Swift because she's "asexual" and "constantly talked about antiques." A rather Regina George-y sounding friend of Taylor's says that America's Unicorn Sweetheart doesn't realize that she's constantly being dumped because she's a "prude"…
R.I.P. Whitney, Phyllis, Nora, and Etta—We Lost Some Treasures in 2012
Happy last-Dirt-Bag-of-the-year!!! Let's talk about death. There's no rhyme or reason—or significance, really—to grouping people together based on the year in which they died. It's pretty arbitrary, if you think about it. Tony Scott's suicide doesn't have anything to do with Michael Clarke Duncan's heart disease. But…
Reese Witherspoon Is Being Asked Dumb Babyweight Questions, Natch
Aw, man. I like Reese Witherspoon just fine, but it's a world-class bummer when actresses say "health" and mean "weight." Having just given birth to son Tennessee James, she addressed someone's question about the Amazing Race to drop her baby weight. "I don't know if I'm bouncing back. I'm slowly crawling back. You know,…
The Weekend's Good, Bad, and Culturally Insensitive Celebrity Halloween …
Across the country this past weekend, celebs got all dressed up for Halloween. Some costumes were cute, some costumes were funny, some costumes were a total embarrassment.
Lady Gaga's Weight Must Be Mystifying The People Who Give a Shit
To the folks who have been screaming AHHHH YOU GAINED WEIGHT, WHAT ARE YOU, FATNESS EVERDEEN, Lady Gaga continues to level a resounding "Fuck yourself." Although the rumor out of Universal is that they had to order new, larger costumes for her, she told radio host Elvis Duran that she "doesn't feel bad about it. Not even…
Chivalrous Gentleman Bret Easton Ellis Sort of Defends Paris Hilton’s…
On Thursday, non-notable person of note Paris Hilton made a yucky face
