Baby Panda Riding On A Pony, Need We Say More

» 1/01/14 11:30pm 1/01/14 11:30pm

This baby panda was born in 2013 and is now big enough to explore and run wild with our emotions. There is not a more perfect way to kickoff 2014 than with an adorable baby panda, playing on a pony ride. OMG I want to watch the baby panda rock back and forth all day. And then he (or she?) falls on his (or her??) butt! … » 1/01/14 11:30pm 1/01/14 11:30pm

Watch Newly-Named Panda Cubs Grow Into Fuzzy Toddlerhood

Zoo Atlanta finally got around to naming its panda twins yesterday, so let this serve as your formal introduction to Mei Lun and Mei Huan. Mei Lun wants to be an astronaut one day, but Mei Huan already shows signs of not living up to his full potential and has vague plans to start an Internet squee company. Or… » 10/24/13 10:30pm 10/24/13 10:30pm

Government Shutdown Might Kill An Adorable Panda... Cam

One potential casualty of the looming (constitutionally mandated that I use the word "looming" in reference to government shutdown- Article 12, Section 6, HISTORY: LEARN IT) government shutdown isn't the jobs of hundreds of thousands of federal employees or even my sanity, after having to listen to the yammering of the… » 9/30/13 6:40pm 9/30/13 6:40pm

The Smithsonian Zoo's New Baby Panda...Is a Girl!!!

Break out the pink cigars (NOT A EUPHEMISM, KEVIN) and the unattainable beauty standards—the Smithsonian Zoo just announced that their newborn baby panda is a girl! Born August 23, the cub is reportedly squeaky and healthy, and paternity tests determined that her father is the Smithsonian's own Tian Tian. (Her mother,… » 9/05/13 6:45pm 9/05/13 6:45pm

A Somewhat Graphic and Wildly Frustrating Tale of Panda Sex

During the act of sexual intercourse and all the various steps leading up to it, it's important to make sure that you and your partner(s) are on the same page, lest the experience go to shambles. This is a sentence I wish I could say to Tian Tian and Mei Xiang, panda residents of the National Zoo, who have missed the… » 8/28/13 3:20pm 8/28/13 3:20pm

The National Zoo's Newborn Panda Is Certified Adorable

WASHINGTON, DC - AUGUST 25: In this handout photo provided by Smithsonian's National Zoo, the giant panda cub born on August 23 at the Smithsonian's National Zoo receives an exam from animal care staff on August 25, 2013 in Washington, DC. Chief veterinarian Suzan Murray reports that the cub is robust, has a steady… » 8/25/13 4:00pm 8/25/13 4:00pm

Panada Fuckwatch Ends in Disappointment with Artificial Insemination

After about two months waiting with baited breath for the 36-hours window in which the giant pandas Tian Tian and Yang Guang would have species-prolonging intercourse and give the British Isles a delightful baby panda, scientists at the Edinburgh Zoo announced that, because Tian Tian was showing signs that were not… » 4/21/13 1:00pm 4/21/13 1:00pm

Panda FuckWatch 2013 Kicks Into High-Gear with Rigorous Panda…

Last weekend, officials at the Edinburgh Zoo made it explicitly, NC-17 clear that their resident giant pandas, Yang Guang and Tian Tian, are on the cusp of copulating. It could really happen any day now, and rather than be caught unawares by the Great Panda Fuckathon of 2013, zookeepers have been hard at work "training"… » 2/24/13 3:00pm 2/24/13 3:00pm

Experts Say That Giant Pandas at the Edinburgh Zoo Will Soon Be Down…

Giant pandas, the seldom-mating mammal that humans just won't allow to fade mercifully into extinction, are world-renowned for their reluctance to make new pandas, so it's pretty big news that the UK's only panda couple might be getting ready to do the sex to each other, or at least have scientists "assist" them with the … » 2/17/13 2:00pm 2/17/13 2:00pm