Who cares if smartphones give you eye cancer and brain tumors? There's something much worse that your cell and tablet are doing to your head: They're giving your neck and lower face a crease. A crease. That's horrifying and you're doing nothing to stop it.

Online dating is incredibly competitive — one gentleman I once went out with told me he had two dates planned after me — but it can also be incredibly expensive and painful; especially if you're trying to join BeautifulPeople.com, the best site for the best-looking people where no one is safe from scrutiny.

Here's a story that you won't soon forget: A man was rushed to the emergency room after sustaining an erection that lasted almost a full day. The way that the doctors had to bring him down will turn your stomach. Or give you sympathy pains. Look, it's not good, okay?

It only took a decade, but it looks like America is perhaps finally losing its taste for revolting new varieties of flavored vodka. Guess everyone finally realized that candy corn is bad anyway; the only thing that makes it worse is combining it with vodka.

Childbirth is one messy, horrible, beautiful, painful, awe-inspiring, bodily fluid geyser of a shitshow. As a twenty-something with no intention of starting a family anytime soon, it absolutely terrifies me. So let's watch some dudes watch some childbirth so I can feel better about my own fears regarding the miracle…

A new study indicates that rodents are influenced by the scent of the sex of the researcher studying them, a finding that has could have big ramifications for numerous studies where animals are used.

Just to make your office just a liiiittle more sexually charged, the face you make when you're having an orgasm might be interchangeable to the face you make when you get a paper cut, posits a new study out of The Hebrew University of Jerusalem that was printed in Science yesterday. Researchers showed 45 Princeton…

If you'd just broken up with a dentist, you probably wouldn't go back to her office for help with a toothache a few days later—what with all the sharp objects and opportunities for inflicting pain. And yet, for some reason, that is exactly what Marek Olszewski of Poland did. But rather than get revenge by just being a…

If you are in full mourning over the end of Downton Abbey coming to an end for the moment, perhaps these stylish Downton trading cards from Vanity Fair will be of some comfort. I'll trade you a Lady Edith and a Branson for an Anna and Mr. Bates.

Much unlike many a magazine editor who recommends you buy all sorts of crap that they most likely got for free, your Jezebel staff doesn't get jack shit (other than books, unsolicited). And that's how it should be. But on our own time, in our personal lives, we still buy stuff. So this is Worth It, our recommendation…

The idea that women are hardcore rocks who can withstand any amount of physical pain with serenity and fortitude has been around for a long time. After all, we have to survive monthly go-rounds with monster menstrual cramps and then many of us have to push a giant baby skull through our most delicate parts. We do…

There's a tattoo studio near my office called Skin Thrills. A sign out front advertises their special offers — $50 roses on Tuesdays, or $25 dollar kanji letters on Thursdays. As I drove past the sign last week, work was quickly driven out of my mind and replaced with two thoughts. One: I wonder what the kanji for…

New medical research from the University College of London suggests that crossing your arms over your midsection not only keeps strangers from talking to you at parties, it also confuses your brain, thus distracting it from pain.

In hyping an industry that has long gotten rich promulgating "sexy torture," America's Next Top Model is a perfect case study of how violent imagery plays out in the reality TV landscape. Sadism has been a recurring theme.

Thanks to new 3-D technology, having braces could get easier than ever. And I, for one, am resentful.