Resentful Florida Teen Will Seek Senate Reelection After All, and Honestly, Why Do You Guys Even Care, Go Away

“I have only said like 1000 times I will be a private citizen in January,” failed Republican presidential candidate and agitated ninth grader Marco Rubio tweeted approximately one month ago, in response to a Washington Post story that suggested he was unsure about his political future. On Wednesday, the Washington…

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Samantha Bee Poetically Bludgeons the 'Party of Lincoln,' Who 'Died Peacefully of Natural Causes'

On the latest episode of Full Frontal With Samantha Bee, our host took a beautiful rhetorical dump on the Republican Party, whose comrades in the Senate recently rejected four extremely sane measures restricting gun sales one week after 49 people were murdered in an Orlando gay club.

Florida Governor/Voldemort Rick Scott: 'The Second Amendment Didn't Kill Anybody'

In an interview with CNN today, Florida Governor Rick Scott—an empty shell of a man so comically villainous that comparisons to Voldemort are unfair to Voldemort—defended Florida’s gun laws. In the interview, Scott was asked about President Obama’s speech where he challenged, “those who defend the easy accessibility…

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