Old Man Slashes Woman's Tires After She Sits in His Bingo Seat

For some people, bingo isn’t just a game, it’s serious business. 82-year-old Fred Smith became angry when he saw 88-year-old Ethel Britt sitting in his favorite bingo seat. In an act of geriatric revenge, he slashed the tires on her van with an ice pick. The bingo game occurred at Lake Ashton Retirement Community Club… »5/31/15 7:45pm5/31/15 7:45pm

Aging Actress Maggie Gyllenhaal 'Too Old' to Play 55-Year-Old's Lover

37-year-old Maggie Gyllenhaal was recently told by a Hollywood producer that she was “too old” to play the love interest of a 55-year-old man. In an interview with The Wrap, Gyllenhaal said she was surprised by the producer’s admission, but that it’s just one of the many “disappointing things about being an actress in… »5/21/15 9:50am5/21/15 9:50am

White for Fun, Brown for Settling: Interracial Dating's Generation Gap

If I had a nickel for every time I heard that I should be dating Sri Lankan men to preserve my Tamil heritage, I wouldn't be rich. But if I had a nickel for every time that sentiment was passive-aggressively indicated to me by various women in my family (better known as "aunties" in my culture), let's just say I'd be… »2/04/14 5:00pm2/04/14 5:00pm

Random Elderly Woman In Drum Store Proceeds To Rock The Fuck Out

To paraphrase the Palm d'Or-winning film Shrek, old people are like onions — they have a specific smell, they add necessary flavor and you never know what's under each layer. This woman, reportedly a grandma, walked into the Coalition Drum Shop in La Crosse, Wisconsin, played rock drums like a member of Mötley Crüe… »7/20/13 1:00pm7/20/13 1:00pm

105-Year-Old Woman May Have Found the Elixir of Life: Bacon

Pearl Cantrell celebrated her 105th birthday this week. Having outlived three of her seven children as well as her husband, she's lived a long and fruitful life. Her daughter Anno says that even after a 100 years, Pearl is still very active and loves to dance. Though the Texan woman's optimistic outlook on life and… »5/08/13 2:35pm5/08/13 2:35pm

Speaking a Second Language Could Keep You from Getting Dementia

Wait, speaking multiple languages keeps your brain young? Goddamnit. The closest I ever came to learning a second language is that my mom speaks passable Norwegian when she's drunk (I suppose I'm glad my childhood wasn't one long Drunkmomwegian immersion program), which means that I am impenetrably, painfully… »1/09/13 2:10pm1/09/13 2:10pm

Elderly Chinese Parents Can Now Take their Adult Children to Court for Not Visiting Enough

Today, China's national legislature passed a new law that, once enacted, will require citizens to visit their elderly parents "often," or go to court. This law is so, so ripe for 1980's style stand up jokes about mothers in law, or a very special episode of Married... With Chidren where someone gets bumped on the head… »12/28/12 7:10pm12/28/12 7:10pm

People Who 'Age Gracefully' Actually Have Gigantic Super-Brains

Getting older is pretty much the scariest thing. We gain weight, our skin sags, our bones hurt, and our brains get weird. It's totally dumb! I am against it! That's why there are a million billion products (I counted) dedicated to preserving youth, and people do crazy shit like rub butterfly placenta on their faces… »8/17/12 3:20pm8/17/12 3:20pm

Want Your Kids to Live a Long Time? Make Sure Their Dad's an Old Guy

New research shows that children of men who fathered them later in life may be able to expect to live longer than those of us whose fathers were young. But don't run into a nursing home with your pants around your ankles and arms outstretched just yet — the "older dad, longer life" principle only seems to apply to… »6/12/12 6:25pm6/12/12 6:25pm

Everyone! Stop Giving Old People a Pass Just for Being Old!

French parfumier Jean-Paul Guerlain was fined 6,000 euros this week for making racist comments in a televised interview. When discussing his famous Samsara fragrance (a "heady oriental fragrance featuring main notes of jasmine and sandalwood"), Guerlain said, "And for once I started working like a nigger. I don't know… »3/29/12 7:00pm3/29/12 7:00pm