Apparently everyone's been blabbing the past couple of days about whether or not Kim Kardashian's famous butt is a real butt or a surgically enhanced butt, because she BETTER NOT HAVE DONE ANYTHING TO HER BUTT because THAT WOULD BE LYING and the American public deserves 100% accurate celebrity butt info. Well, Kim…
Downtown mainstay, (excellent) actress and sartorial pioneer Chloë Sevigny hates to sound like an old fuddy-duddy, but she really wants you to pull your tiny denim shorts out of your crack and study for your SATs.
- Comeback kid (?) Lindsay Lohan has already gone back to her complicated lifestyle of dramarama mixed with rich-people acquisitions. We could talk about her for hours—she just never stops! All that Red Bull, maybe. Here we go.
- Nicole Kidman is on the February cover of Harper's Bazaar, and inside, she is interviewed by Jennifer Aniston. (They're both in that new Adam Sandler flick.) Nic tells Jen how she felt when she first met Keith Urban.
- Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling are not dating.
- In an upcoming MTV documentary about her, Nicki Minaj discusses how The Showbiz's double-standardism discourages women artists from being more assertive. "When I am assertive, I'm a bitch," she says. "When a man is assertive, he's a boss."
- Apparently Dina Lohan has forgotten that Lindsay Lohan is in court-ordered rehab in lieu of jail. Dina says she's, "trying to get her to New York to be with us for Thanksgiving," and the judge isn't pleased.
- The Dancing With the Stars production office intercepted a "threatening letter containing white powder" (it was talcum) that forced a building evacuation. The FBI is investigating! Could the perps be those "haters" who Bristol Palin's been talking about lately?
- Scarlett Johansson, GQ's Babe Of The Year, and Ryan Reynolds, People's Sexiest Man Alive, may be having relationship "troubles."
- Dina Lohan would like to take legal action against Glee for mocking Lindsay Lohan.
- Prince William popped the question! He asked Kate Middleton to marry him! The press can no longer call her Waity Katie!
- Snooki will celebrate her birth — and safe sex — on Saturday night with a party sponsored by LifeStyles condoms.
- After almost getting divorced, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are back in marital blissland and preparing to renew their marriage vows. They've been through so much together! Isn't their ability to forget the past kind of inspiring?
- While a then 17-year-old Demi Lovato was allegedly snorting cocaine "like a pro," the host of the party was filming her. Now he's shopping a video in which she screams while high, "Fuck all of you, I'm famous..."
- Teen Mom star Amber Portwood's boyfriend Gary Shirley has been photographed hooking up with another woman at a club. Amber's dad confirms that they've broken up, adding that it's Gary's fault that Amber hit him on national television.
- In a totally predicable career move, Kim Kardashian has started recording an album. It seems Kim wants to be a pop star, thus proving that she has talent for something other than making sexyface and gabbing about her family.
- Tragic: Lily Allen has suffered a second miscarriage. She was six-months pregnant.
- "I want a guy who takes charge, but lets me have my say once in a while," Taylor Swift says. Only once in a while, though! Could this explain why she's been dating older men?
- Betty White is on the cover of Parade magazine, and inside, she discusses her views on gay marriage.