More Details on the Lawsuit Alleging Nicholas Sparks Is a Jerk Bigot

If you're looking for some inspiration to write a viciously witty Jane Austen-style comedy of manners set in a small Southern milieu, you'd do well to turn your attention to the scandal at the small private school founded by Nicholas Sparks in New Bern, North Carolina. » 2/10/15 1:00pm 2/10/15 1:00pm

Dear God, The Longest Ride Trailer Is Peak Nicholas Sparks


It's that time of the year again, when the earth begins to prepare itself for the next installment of Nicholas Sparks' borderline oppressive young-hot-love-but-will-they-make-it? stories. He really stepped their game up this time because The Longest Ride features not one, but two whole terrible romances in two… » 12/23/14 6:40pm 12/23/14 6:40pm

​I Pulled a Black Friday All-Nighter & Lived to Tell the Tale (Barely)

It's Thanksgiving evening, roughly 7:30 p.m. "Are you sure you don't want to bail?" my mother-in-law asks, with barely concealed concern, as we approach the exit for the Secaucus, New Jersey Walmart. I promise I'll text updates and swear that if something goes hideously awry and I'm marooned in a sea of big-box… » 12/03/14 2:10pm 12/03/14 2:10pm

The Notebook (and Therefore Nicholas Sparks) Almost Didn't Happen

Guys, The Notebook—and therefore the entire treacly Nicholas Sparks Sob-tainment Industry—very nearly did not happen. » 10/22/14 10:45am 10/22/14 10:45am

Fuck Nicholas Sparks

Hollywood is cranking out yet another Nicholas Sparks movie (The Best of Me, for those keeping track). And I would like to take this opportunity to get something off my chest: Oh my God, I cannot stand the Nicholas Sparks Hollywood perpetual motion entertainment machine. » 9/26/14 11:39am 9/26/14 11:39am

It's Time to Talk About Another Nicholas Sparks Movie

Hurray! There's another movie adaptation of a Nicholas Sparks movie and the trailer is out! Let's obsess over every second of it, shall we? » 6/08/14 8:30pm 6/08/14 8:30pm

Dirt Bag: Billy Elliot Marries Marilyn Manson's Ex-Girlfriend

Evan Rachel Wood (a.k.a. the Vampire Queen of Louisiana a.k.a. the second-blowjobbiest girl in Thirteen) got totally nuptialed to Jamie Bell (a.k.a. Billy Elliot a.k.a. the man on the ledge’s brother in Man on a Ledge) in an extremely tender ceremony that nobody knew about: » 10/31/12 8:28pm 10/31/12 8:28pm

Canoe Rides, Beach Towns, and Lovesick White People: Yep, a New…

Nicholas "Hemingway" Sparks sure has his formula down pat. Sad hot white lady meets sad hot white dude. Someone is dead. Someone dies. They fall in love in a quaint small town. They sit in a canoe. They bone in the rain. Trials. Tribulations. Trust that the audience will all be a the right point in their menstrual… » 10/24/12 12:00pm 10/24/12 12:00pm

You Will Never Have A Break From Nicholas Sparks

A bidding war is starting over the film rights to Nicholas Sparks' book Safe Haven, which is a thriller, not another romance. Oh wait, the tag is, "In the darkest hour, love is the only true safe haven." Nevermind. » 8/04/10 6:12am 8/04/10 6:12am

The Last Song: Mediocre, "Heavy-Handed Fluff" Marred By Miley's Sneer

It seems like we're not the only ones sick of Nicholas Sparks and his calculated brand of maudlin, vanilla-flavored romance. Critics are none too keen on The Last Song. And they hate Miley. » 3/31/10 1:20pm 3/31/10 1:20pm

The Unbearable Monotony Of Nicholas Sparks

David Germain of The Huffington Post calls Nicholas Sparks the "melodramatic machine." Machine's a good word, because it seems like he churns out dreck at an alarming rate. Worse, there's some kind of unspoken understanding that women like this crap. » 3/30/10 5:00pm 3/30/10 5:00pm

Charlie Sheen's Car Stolen & Crashed; Is Anderson Cooper Adopting A…

Dear John Should Have Taken A Page From The Notebook

Dear John, which opens today, is based on a Nicholas Sparks book in which young lovers (Amanda Seyfried and Channing Tatum) keep their relationship alive by writing to each other. Sadly, critics did not love it, "like McAdams loves Gosling." » 2/05/10 4:30pm 2/05/10 4:30pm

Publishers Weekly blogger Barbara Vey plays devil's advocate today and wonders if men can write romance. Although Vey calls out Nicholas Sparks (A Walk to Remember), Paul Levine and Tim Dorsey as good romance-writing dudes. I favor the more sarcastic Charles Baxter and his hilariously sweet novel The Feast of Love.… » 11/20/07 1:45pm 11/20/07 1:45pm