Viewers who watched Tuesday’s popular premiere episode of NBC’s tear-inducing new show This Is Us with closed captioning turned on experienced a rude surprise when they read Sterling K. Brown’s character referring affectionately to his daughter as “my little bull dyke.” The on-screen text didn’t match the show’s…

I was promised tears, but the pilot of NBC’s much-hyped This Is Us left me dry. “Must-Weep TV,” said The Atlantic. “This Is Us will give you something to cry about,” said Salon. “Watching This Is Us is like getting beaten up with a pillow soaked in tears,” said The New York Times. Bullshit, I say.

NBC is hard at work on a “sexy” new take on Oliver Twist with, get this: A hot chick instead of an adolescent filth waif. “It’ll be like 2 Broke Girls, but if Kat Dennings slept in horse manure instead of a huge Williamsburg loft, and if Beth Behrs were a rat,” the producers shriek, snorting a line off a prostrate…

It’s almost September, which means it’s almost time to pack the kids off to school, get out the coats (oh god, please let this heat finally recede), and get ready for the new TV season to begin. Some of these shows even manage without time travel!

Kara Brown is in Rio right now, and will be checking in periodically with on-the-ground coverage of the 2016 Summer Olympic games.

You know who really knows a lot about women? NBC. Hooo boy, does NBC have women pegged.

Beep beep, booty alert.

In February, it was reported that NBC had ordered a series based on Cruel Intentions, the 1999 movie that helped many of us discover true horniness for the first time. In May, they announced the series at their upfronts, but it was then nowhere to be seen on their fall schedule. There are now too many Cruel Intentions…

Hairspray Live isn’t airing until December 7, but little talent breadcrumbs keep getting dropped to lead us through the entertainment famine of August. There are so many characters in Hairspray, so these announcements will make for tasty morsels for the rest of fall and summer. Yum!

Variety reports that Tyra Banks, former Top Model host and proud owner of one very exaggerated certificate from Harvard Business School, will star as a “mentor” to would-be entrepreneurs on Funded, NBC’s answer to Shark Tank. Hopefully this time nobody ends up addicted to meth or murdered in a triple-homicide!

The sequel to 1999's Cruel Intentions has been waiting and waiting for its release, but NBC is won’t bring it to completion.

If you happen to drag yourself out of bed before noon on a Saturday and tune your TV set to a broadcast network, you might notice something missing. Specifically, what you’d recognize as a traditional Saturday morning cartoon.

Today anchor Savannah Guthrie said that she will skip covering the Olympic Games over Zika concerns. The Hollywood Reporter notes that Guthrie, who is expecting her second child, is “most high-profile TV personality to opt out of the Games.”

Sinead O’Connor has reportedly gone missing from a Chicago suburb, after leaving for a bike ride early Sunday. O’Connor has been publicly struggling with mental health issues and a fraught child custody situation.

Look, I’m never one to celebrate when someone loses a gig; being unemployed is difficult and the landscape across all forms of art media is a long and potentially unnavigable stretch of quicksand with no guarantees.

At the end of every season of The Biggest Loser, there is an unspoken, collective bracing by the contestants and the public. Sixteen contestants have made impressive progress in transforming their bodies, often losing hundreds of pounds and building new muscle. On the show’s ranch, diet and exercise are everything—but…

Having done The Sound of Music, Peter Pan, and The Wiz—excuse me, The Sound of Music Live!, Peter Pan Live! and The Wiz Live!—NBC is gearing up for Hairspray, which now has an official air date: December 7.

Good news for everyone who yearns for the 1990s and whose sexual coming-of-age was deeply influenced by Sarah Michelle Gellar and Selma Blair: Variety reports that NBC has ordered a series based on the classic camp movie, Cruel Intentions. The television iteration of the teen melodrama is set 15 years after its…

Amy Poehler and Rashida Jones, who both starred on NBC’s Parks and Recreation, are returning to the network with two new comedies. According to the Hollywood Reporter, NBC has ordered pilots for two shows executively produced by both women.