Mike Huckabee Totally Has 'Friends Who Are Gay'

Mike Huckabee was on television this morning and went full Huckabee. The former Arkansas governor appeared on CNN's State of the Union this morning where he had a lot to say! Well, mostly he just talked about how gay people are totally ruining America. First he said that being gay was a lifestyle choice, just like… » 2/01/15 2:30pm 2/01/15 2:30pm

Watch Jon Stewart Crush Mike Huckabee's Idiotic Anti-Beyoncé Argument

Did you know that Beyoncé can win a debate without even showing up? She proved this last night when her latest detractor, Mike Huckabee, went on The Daily Show to tell Jon Stewart why she is ruining America and instead reminded us that he's an irrelevant, out-of-touch idiot whose arguments are made of garbage.… » 1/20/15 5:30pm 1/20/15 5:30pm

Shade Court: Lupita, a Confused People Magazine, and Grumpy Huckabee

This was a truly exceptional week in erroneous shade usage. My list of cases was long, but as Chief Justice of Shade, it was my duty to select only the most egregious cases. The docket was so full that I couldn't even cloud Andy Cohen's sad-sack usage of shade. He, of all people, truly should know better. » 1/16/15 3:45pm 1/16/15 3:45pm

Mike Huckabee Thinks Somebody Gives a Shit About His Beyoncé Opinions 

Smell that? It's the pile of crap we're currently bearing down upon—otherwise known as an election year. And the bottle fly of the day is Mike Huckabee, who just doesn't understand how the Obamas, "exemplary parents in many ways," can expose their daughters to the walking scandal that is Beyonce. » 1/13/15 2:15pm 1/13/15 2:15pm

Houston's Lesbian Mayor Is Getting Flooded With Protest Bibles

Houston mayor Annise Parker has been sent between 500 and 1,000 Bibles at her home, part of a bizarre protest effort orchestrated by Mike Huckabee and Ted Cruz, and with enthusiastic support from Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity. That quartet of geniuses claims that Parker, Houston's first openly gay mayor, is spearheading… » 10/29/14 12:50pm 10/29/14 12:50pm

Mike Huckabee Thinks Lady Candidates Should Be Treated With 'Chivalry'

2016 is right around the corner, election-wise, which means the breathless profiles of potential presidential candidates are upon us. This week Mike Huckabee gets the will-he-or-won't-he treatment, which he took as an opportunity to suggest that political candidates of the female persuasion require courtliness and… » 3/11/14 4:50pm 3/11/14 4:50pm

Mike Huckabee Is on the Right Side of History Because Gays are Gross

Oh, Huckles! He's at it again, the scamp. On his show Sunday morning, Mike "Huckles" Chucklebee was just beside himself (THE EXPRESSION, NOT LIKE TWO MIKE HUCKABEES SITTING NEXT TO EACH OTHER IN A GAY WAY) over the fact that the mean old "extremist" Supreme Court is going to let gay people snuggle 'neath the watchful… » 7/02/13 1:20pm 7/02/13 1:20pm

Have Fun with Your Silly 'Gun Control' vs. 'Mental Illness' Debate—the…

'Sup, sheeple! While you've all been binging on red herrings like "Maybe we should provide brain care for humans?" and "Maybe we shouldn't sell portable child-exterminators at Walmart?" the REAL Americans have been getting down to business. Lucky for our children's futures, the Mike Huckabee/Victoria Jackson Brain… » 12/17/12 3:45pm 12/17/12 3:45pm

Chick-fil-A Owners to Stop Funding Anti-Gay Groups, Will Still Be…

Today, Chick-fil-A's famously homophobic owners released a statement announcing that the fast food chain would no longer be donating money to anti-gay groups. Victory, right? We totally win, right?! Not really. Regardless of whether the Chick-fil-A brass are contributing to a camp that uses Jesus to turn homos into… » 9/19/12 2:05pm 9/19/12 2:05pm

Playgirl Offers Prince Harry One Million Dollars to Photograph Ye Olde…

Ever since some jerk took blurry naked photos of Prince Harry's royal junk cavorting in Vegas, the internet's been all, "BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH." And now Playgirl wants in on the blah-blahs, offering Harry six figures to display his Moste Honorable Penis and Testes of the Realm in the pages of their fine… » 8/23/12 8:45pm 8/23/12 8:45pm

Presidential Candidates Grapple Over Who Loves Zygotes The Most

Last night, Des Moines, Iowa hosted the premiere for an anti-abortion film called "The Gift of Life." Winner of the 2008 Iowa Caucus Mike Huckabee hosted the event, and before the lights dimmed and the audience was able to bathe in the soft glow of a movie that repeated back to them things they already thought,… » 12/15/11 3:50pm 12/15/11 3:50pm

Mike Huckabee And The Patriarchy, Sitting In A Tree

"The most important form of government is father, mother, and children," says the former Republican presidential candidate. Well, that settles it. Mike Huckabee loves the patriarchy. He wants to hold hands with it and buy it jewelry and marry it and lord over it like a father in "the most important form of government"… » 3/06/11 11:40am 3/06/11 11:40am