I'm So Happy That Britney Spears Is Happy

Since first hopping aboard Mickey Mouse’s Coaster Of Long-Term Emotional Repercussions in the early 90s, Britney Spears has felt plenty of emotions—perhaps even all of them. But now, on May 1, 2015, she is officially feeling happy. Isn’t that great? After falling onstage in Las Vegas and injuring her ankle earlier…
Is Jennifer Garner Cheating On Ben Affleck?
Jennifer Garner was spotted canoodling with Mickey Mouse in Anaheim’s Disneyland theme park yesterday, leading to rumors that the actress’ marriage to Ben Affleck is on the rocks. While Mickey’s womanizing is an open secret in Hollywood, this is the first time he’s been spotted in public with Garner.
Taylor Swift Photo Op Cancelled After ‘Creepy’ 39-Year-Old Troll Wins
Boston's Kiss FM has cancelled a contest to get a picture backstage with Taylor Swift because the winner was a "creepy" 39-year-old man named Charles who intended to troll Swift after securing his victory with the help of 4chan, Reddit and spambot votes. Earlier this month, someone posted on behalf of ol' Chuck:
Hello Kitty Has Improbably Kept a Factory in Syria Open
Cartoon characters can perform lots of physics-defying sight gags. Sometimes, they can even cross over from Toon Town into the real-person world and cause portly private detectives no end of trouble. Or help Michael Jordan save Earth from aliens. Or scoop out large chunks of a child’s brain with all the practiced…
Sunday Sign-Off: Celebrate the Birth of an Animated Rodent
You could watch the American Music Awards tonight, or you could celebrate the 84th birthday of Mickey Mouse, the animated rodent who, for better or worse, spawned the eventual Disneyfication of American pop culture. So, raise your glasses for Mickey, and contemplate, perhaps, how truly, deeply fucked up it is that…
Disney Will Be Taking Your Babies Now, Thank You
The Walt Disney Company, those white-glove-wearing cartoon animals who want to brand everything you touch or consume, is making a distinct push to become America's premiere baby outfitter, moving their brand's first impression on humans closer and closer to the moment of conception. Soon, we'll all be artificially…
Disney, Fatphobia, & The "Pooh Sized" Debate
Earlier this week, a post appeared on the blog Disney Kicks Ass, informing readers that some rides at the original Anaheim Disneyland had to be re-engineered. Oh boy.
Quiet As A Mouse
[Manchester, May 16. Image via Splash.]
Brad Cast In Basterds After Getting Drunk & High With Tarantino
- How did Brad Pitt end up in Inglourious Basterds? Booze and weed maybe:
Of Mice And Men Wolverines
[Los Angeles, April 23. Image via Getty]
Disney Eggs: They're Eggs. By Disney.
We have rarely been as confused or disturbed by anything in our lives as we are by the new "Disney Eggs," which we discovered via a commercial break during the fourth hour of Today.
Scarlett Johansson Visits Rwanda To Check Up On Bono's Projects
- Scarlett Johansson is just getting back from a four-day trip to Rwanda, where she visited AIDS clinics. She went in conjunction with (RED) and says: "I came here with an open mind, wanting to listen, understand and learn; I leave with the overwhelming understanding that the small action of making a (RED) choice in…
Minnie Needs Less Gigs Than Mickey • Morning Sickness Gender Myth May Be True
Dita Von Teese Wants To Give Our Breasts A Lift
- Dita von Teese is collaborating with Wonderbra on a lingerie collection to be called — so original! — Wonderbra by Dita von Teese. Um, what would Dita von Teese know about needing a Wonderbra? [Vogue UK]
- BBC reporter Jeremy Paxman, no stranger to calling attention to the pressing news stories of our time, is currently…
Just as we have long suspected: Elisabeth Hasselbeck is evil! Or filthy, at least? Today on The View the ladies discussed how there is an unfortunate mouse infestation problem over at ABC Studios. (And no, not the Mickey Mouse kind. A la Disney. A la ABC's parent company.) Apparently, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, who is away…
If Jezebel Was A 'Simpsons' Character She Might Look Like This
- There's a Simpsons character-generator available on the website to promote the Simpsons movie (out in just 4 weeks!). This is what we think Jezebel would look like. [SimpsonsMovie]
- Danny DeVito is to receive the 42nd Karloby Vary International Film Festivals's special award for outstanding creative achievement. We…
