Cartoon characters can perform lots of physics-defying sight gags. Sometimes, they can even cross over from Toon Town into the real-person world and cause portly private detectives no end of trouble. Or help Michael Jordan save Earth from aliens. Or scoop out large chunks of a child’s brain with all the practiced…

So, Miley Cyrus, Mickey Mouse, and Marc Jacobs' Cigarette all walk into a bar... or, er, Jacobs' Mercedes Benz fashion week show. There's a joke in there. Or maybe a picture is worth a thousand jokes?

You could watch the American Music Awards tonight, or you could celebrate the 84th birthday of Mickey Mouse, the animated rodent who, for better or worse, spawned the eventual Disneyfication of American pop culture. So, raise your glasses for Mickey, and contemplate, perhaps, how truly, deeply fucked up it is that…

Progressive politics isn't the first thing that comes to mind when you think about Disneyland, which is why everyone was surprised this week when Disneyland in Tokyo said it will allow same sex couples to get married in the park—though their policy appears to be something of a work in progress.

The Walt Disney Company, those white-glove-wearing cartoon animals who want to brand everything you touch or consume, is making a distinct push to become America's premiere baby outfitter, moving their brand's first impression on humans closer and closer to the moment of conception. Soon, we'll all be artificially…

Earlier this week, a post appeared on the blog Disney Kicks Ass, informing readers that some rides at the original Anaheim Disneyland had to be re-engineered. Oh boy.

[Manchester, May 16. Image via Splash.]

• How did Brad Pitt end up in Inglourious Basterds? Booze and weed maybe:

[Los Angeles, April 23. Image via Getty]