I swore I wasn't going to lead with any Tomkat news today (because oops my brain liquefied from boredom and dripped out my ear all gross), but then the other celebrities had to go and be HELLA UNEVENTFUL. Blame all non-Tomkat celebrities, not me. Anyway, an ex-Scientologist lady told E! that Tom Cruise is "viewed as a…

• Unsolicited Uterus Update: Lizzie McGuire is knocked up!

• Britney's new single drops next week!

• Ladies and gentlemen, Swiftenhaal is no more.

• Reportedly, John Mellencamp (nee Cougar) has "struck up a friendship" with the actress, who has apparently "dropped in" on his tour. Mellencamp and his supermodel wife of 18 years, Elaine Mellencamp (nee Irwin), just announced they're splitting up. Oooh!

The Metropolitan Opera's season premiere may have been controversial, but the culture-lovin' (or fronting) stars' clothes were an unambiguous hit.

[New York, July 25. Image via INFDaily.]

• Mariah Carey has pulled out of a Tyler Perry film.

The Chopard 150th Anniversary Party at Palm Beach, in Cannes, was one odd event: yes, models and A-listers and the creme de la elegant were there. But so were Paris Hilton. And LiLo.