Photoshop Of Horrors
A retoucher for
Maxim Mexico went a little loco on
this model's waist. The thing about it is that it's not just offensive for like obvious objectification reasons (because really, only objects like action figures or Barbies could ever be proportioned like that), but it's also just a completely piss poor job with the "liquify" tool. I took it upon myself to "fix" her waist, using the same liquify filter in Photoshop. (Click image to compare Maxim's version and Jezebel's version of this image.) [
Photoshop Disasters]
Israeli photographer
Rachel Papo has a
book coming out, featuring her
series on female soldiers called
Serial No. 3817131. Papo was in the Israeli Air Force in the late 80s, and, according to a blurb on her publisher's website, her photos reveal "these young girls caught in transient moments of self-reflection and uncertainty, as if stuck in a state of contradiction. Rather than portraying the soldier as heroic, confident, or proud, Papo’s photographs reveal the soldier and the teenage girl in constant negotiation, caught between two extremes: a soldier who lives on an army base surrounded by hundreds just like her, but underneath her uniform, there is an individual who wishes to be noticed." Somehow, these women manage to explore their individuality without
taking their clothes off, unlike the Israeli soldiers featured in
Maxim this month. [
Rachel Papo Official Site,
Powerhouse Books via
Jewcy]
Fertile Crescents
You'd think that the occasion of Israel's 60th birthday would be enough to boost tourism, but you'd be wrong. In fact, the little country that could has taken to less-traditional means to raise awareness about how vacation-worthy it is: Participating in a
sexy spread in American
Maxim featuring women currently serving in the Israeli military. Women! Guns! Bikinis! (Is this why lobbyist groups
are harping on Victoria's Secret model Bar Rafaeli to come back and fulfill her military service already?) Click on the picture to view a video about the story. [
Reason]
dirt bag
- Nelson Mandela personally called Amy Winehouse and asked her to sing at his birthday party on June 27! The former president of South Africa phoned her! Bono, Elton John and Annie Lennox are expected to perform as well. This UK paper says,"Let's hope [Amy] bee-hives herself!" Yuk, yuk. [Mirror]
- Meanwhile: Does Blake Incarcerated have a secret mistress? Is he plotting with the "mystery blonde" to run away with her — and a chunk of Amy's £10 million fortune? [The Sun]
- Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are due in court today for a progress review. A completely uninformed opinion? She's doing better. [People]
- Owen Wilson allegedly picked up some chick (not Kate Hudson) and invited her back to is boat and propositioned her to join him in a threesome with Vince Vaughn. There was a time that a Butterscotch Stallion/Money Baby sandwich would have been soooo hot, and that time was 2001. [Perez Hilton]
- Britney's back at work on How I Met Your Mother. She looks cute dressed to match Neil Patrick Harris! [TMZ]
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idiot maximus
So
last year,
Maxim named
Sarah Jessica Parker the unsexiest woman alive. Recently, SJP
responded to the unfortunate accolade, saying "It's so brutal in a way, so filled with rage and anger. It upset him [Matthew], because it has to do with his judgment too...Am I really the unsexiest women in the world? Wow! It's kind of shocking...It's condemnation, it's insane." Today,
Guardian columnist
Ariel Leve wonders why Parker let it bother her in the first place. "What makes no sense," Leve writes, "is how someone like Sarah Jessica Parker - such a sensible person - could take this Maxim list to heart? Why would she expect to fit the ideals of its audience?"
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Loose Lips
Sarah Jessica Parker had
this to say about being voted
Maxim's Unsexiest Woman in the world: "It's so brutal in a way, so filled with rage and anger. It upset him [Matthew], because it has to do with his judgment too. Do I have big fake boobs, Botox and big lips? No. Do I fit some ideals and standards of some men writing in a men's magazine? Maybe not. Am I really the unsexiest women in the world? Wow! It's kind of shocking...It's condemnation, it's insane. What can I do? I guess you can't please all people." • Seal went off on
the paparazzi last night outside Madeo restaurant, calling them "cockroaches" who "ruin people's lives." • Madonna and
Guy Richie were spotted out on a very public
dinner date, perhaps to rebut recent rumors about an imminent split between the couple? [
DListed,
TMZ,
Page Six]
clips
Famously fake-breasted Maxim cover girl Heidi Montag from
The Hills was on
Jimmy Kimmel last night to promote the magazine's February issue, as well as her single, which drops on iTunes on February 5. Apparently she co-wrote the song, which she describes as "really a piece of me", adding "it's about how you can't hold grudges. You can't waste your time looking back on the past and dwelling over things." Riiiiight. Because writing a thinly veiled song about your former best friend whom you love talking about in magazines, and on radio late night talk show interviews is really looking toward the future! Anyway, we're sure Lauren will be happy to hear that Heidi prays for her regularly. (What does that even mean? And do reality television fame whores living L.A. really pray for people? That shit's about as fake as her show!)
Sarah Jessica Parker, proclaimed ugly by every man I have ever known, was,
as you all know, recently called downright "unsexy" by
Maxim. But that feisty
Carrie Bradshaw claims that she just
don't give a fuck! Parker says that it doesn't matter if you're pretty or not, because we'll all be ugly eventually: "What they don't know is that one day I'll wake up fat. But I'll still be happy, just like I am now." Aw, how nice. Plus, there's the added bonus of cash! After all, as Parker also mentions, "I consider myself a working woman with a family, who is blessed enough to have the sort of job others would die for. How many women wouldn't want to step into the Manolos that are waiting for me... every morning?" SJP: We try
really hard to like you. But we just can't. [
Vogue UK]
maxim
Maxim Online's resident sexpert Lindsay has received an interesting and pretty disturbing query from reader "Tra", who complains that "there are times during sex when, if I get it just right, I can feel something in my girlfriend sorta pop when I jam it all the way."
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Jezebel
Over at Fishbowl they've got a sneak preview of 