On the surface, Fifty Shades of Grey is a fairly tame and boring movie about two very frightened actors who get undressed and tentatively tickle each other with floggers, but something about the film (or maybe its source material) has caused audiences to go fully insane. Here is a timeline of their bacchanalian…

A woman was caught masturbating during a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' screening at a theater in the northwestern state of Sinaloa in Mexico, according to the New York Daily News.

In a move that surprised many people who enjoy a good joke about masturbation, South Dakota has decided that their plan to ensure safe driving while employing puns about touching oneself all over until orgasm were ill-advised. No one knows how they even came up with the idea, but I assume some ingenious advertising…

If you're looking for love this holiday season, one expert says you should make sure to "love your body" before you step under the mistletoe, otherwise you're just going to get hurt. (Possibly have an orgasm before it happens, but definitely hurt after) (Sooo hurt.)

It's the day after Thanksgiving, which means that it's time to start thinking about Christmas. And if the people that matter to you don't have an Amazon wish list, you might consider doing all of your shopping at UPS, where you can now have a dildo 3D printed for you.

When it comes to self pleasure, dudes have a lot more ways to describe their one-on-one time than women. Sure, we're not exactly short for euphemisms: flicking the bean, polishing the pearl, beating around the bush, and the fan favorite: Jilling off, etc. For some reason plenty of people find female masturbation to…

In a new clip from The Interview, James Franco and Seth Rogen's upcoming film, Franco's character Dave Skylark grills Efron about the very important topic of masturbating, which "Efron" can do while driving. "I can masturbate with both hands, which is a total legal grey area," he says. Who knows what the final product…

A Virgin Airlines flight was diverted earlier this week when a passenger, intent on joining the mile-high club, began masturbating furiously while in the air. When apprehended, he attempted — and failed — to make the most daring plane escape in history. Police are calling it a medical emergency.

It's business as usual in Florida, where the sun is shining, Disney World is bringing joys to families from around the world and a half-naked woman named Karen Dilworth was going hell-for-leather on a motorcycle in her garage, banging it in front of kids who just happened to be around.