This Week In Tabloids: Celine Dion's Late Husband René Angélil Was Once Accused of Rape?

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we approach the counter of our new magazine store, ask the friendly man to unbox this week’s tabloids, wait patiently as he finds them, and are given a funny look after telling him that, no, we have no interest in purchasing People or Us Weekly, and that Star, In Touch, OK!, and Life…
This Week In Tabloids: Brad and Angie Are Divorcing Because She's Jealous of Selena Gomez?
Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we find ourselves continuously intrigued by the fact that every single tabloid is obsessed with pink and yellow. This week, Angie and Brad are over because of Selena (they’re not), Kim can’t stop eating (yes she can), Miley’s married (no she’s not), and Casey Anthony is pregnant (I…
Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth Are But Heartbeats Away From (Emotionally) Smashing Again
After Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth were spotted together over New Year’s, TMZ is reporting that it’s just a matter of time before the couple rekindles their romantic flame that once burned so bright, a beacon of hope in the darkness.
Madonna's Kids Are Over Their 'Controlling' Mom
According to a surprisingly detailed story at Page Six, Madonna’s children want little to do with their “controlling” mom. The Madonna-Guy Ritchie-Rocco saga has been ongoing and, according to unnamed sources, the recent custody disputes and Rocco’s refusal to spend time with his mother, are the result of her…
According to Jennifer Lawrence, Liam and Chris Hemsworth are Disgusting, Scab-Eating Animals
Jennifer Lawrence took her signature charm to Conan O’Brien last night and gave the world a bit of insight about the Hemsworth brothers. According to Lawrence, Thor and company are the “craziest family I’ve been around in my life. The way that they communicate is so physical and crazy.” She described the interactions…
This Week In Tabloids: Jen and Justin's Friend May Have Been Murdered During Their Honeymoon?!
Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we head back to the less-reliable newsstand, find ourselves pleasantly surprised to see that they have all the tabloids in stock, grab the four we need, wait in line behind a person buying even more tabloids than you, think about tapping her on the shoulder and saying, “Excellent…
Jennifer Lawrence Is Back, and Singing 'Believe' By Cher
A rabbit jerks his head up, half-eaten carrot instantly forgotten. A squalling toddler quiets mid-scream, his gaze locked on the clear blue sky. A queen bee abandons her hive, feeling the pull of something stronger. “J. Law is back!” the breeze whispers. “J. Law is back!” the cockroaches sing. And the world comes…
Liam Hemsworth and Jimmy Fallon Traipse About in High Heels
Jimmy Fallon seems to have the magic touch when it comes to getting celebrities to do absolutely outrageous things. For example, getting Hunger Games hunk Liam Hemsworth to throw on a pair of veritable FMPs and try them out.
' friends are very concerned about him because he has pretty much been M.I.A. since…Miley's 'Open Letter' to Liam Hemsworth: 'Sorry for Acting So Mad'
According to sources close to Miley Cyrus, she's written an apologetic "open letter" to ex-fiance Liam Hemsworth. What does the open letter say? Back off, busybodies—that's between Miley and Liam!!! What part of "open letter" don't you understand!? In related news, I think it's about time the entire earth has a…
Justin Bieber Made His Bodyguards Carry Him Up the Great Wall of China
Gleeful elf king of Little Shit Kingdom Justin Bieber has just out-Biebered himself: the most devious imp to ever don a flat-rimmed baseball cap made his bodyguards carry him up the Great Wall of China. As an uncouth, wild-eyed barbarian who has been known to urinate upon images of other nation's former leaders,…
