It's true, nothing gold can stay, and by "gold" I mean "Two and a Half Men, the worst CBS show you're not watching." While Ashton Kutcher and Jon Cryer have resigned their contracts for a third season (Kutcher at a $700,000-per-episode payout; Cryer at, I don't know, a gum wrapper and a damp Nickelback ticket stub?),…

In this edition of Tweet Beat, everyone loves James Spader, Steve Carell thinks of a great joke, Iman looks slamming in the '80s and Damon Lindelof is secretly writing for Game of Thrones.

Last night, Cryer appeared on Conan to address negative remarks made about him by his former Two and a Half Men costar Charlie Sheen. In this monologue, Cryer says, "Those words were very painful to me for many reasons, not the least of which is…the fact is I am a troll." He went on to a do a PSA about the…

• Jennifer Aniston laments: "I've been asked lately, 'Jen, what's this baby food diet all about?'"

• Uh-oh: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart had a huge fight on the set of Twilight: Eclipse.

• Avril Lavigne and Lindsay Lohan had a "huge fight" at Hollywood's Chateau Marmont.

• During a radio interview with Philadelphia's 106.1 FM, Michelle "Bombshell" McGee hinted that she may have had a fling with Tiger Woods:

• Jessica Simpson will be on Oprah's show on Wednesday, and apparently she talks about John Mayer:

• Lady Gaga says she's decided "to be single at this point in my life because I don't have the time to get to know anybody. And you know what? It's OK. Even Lady Gaga can be celibate."

• Another day, another John Mayer apology. He told the audience at his sold-out Madison Square Garden show last night, "I hate to come off like an asshole ever, and thank you guys for believing that I am not an asshole..."