Petition Forces Secret Service to Clarify They Won't Allow Guns at the RNC 

The Secret Service has been forced to tell everybody that no, they won’t allow guns on the floor of the Republican National Convention this July. More than 45,000 people have signed a Change.org petition to be allowed to open-carry at the RNC. The petition, from the looks of the creator’s Twitter feed, is likely a…

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Buy This 'Ted Cruz Was the Zodiac Killer' Shirt and Fund Abortions 

We would never say definitively that presidential candidate and absolute charmer Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. That’s just a silly internet joke, children, one that’s gaining traction this election cycle and is in no way substantiated by Cruz’s cold dead eyes or his evident lack of human feeling. Stare into those…

Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden Both Gave Pro Transgender Rights Speeches This Weekend

On Saturday, at a Washington breakfast hosted by the Human Rights Campaign, Vice President Joe Biden and prospective President Hillary Clinton both gave impassioned speeches in support of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Americans—and our stalwart veep managed to squeeze in a rock solid republican diss, too.

'My Idol' Is The Internet's Funniest New Obsession

If you’ve been on Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, or Vine lately, then you’ve probably seen pictures or videos of strange, cartoony characters recently. Maybe they’re pole dancing. Maybe they’re singing Frozen’s Let It Go. Maybe they have a celebrity’s face. Or maybe they look like a monstrosity that shouldn’t exist.

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Daniel Tosh Reportedly Scrambling to Find Non-Rape Joke Before New Show Premieres Today

Comedian Daniel Tosh, fresh off opening a squirming can of rape worms by telling a female heckler that it would be funny if she got sexually assaulted by, like five guys, has a bit of a problem on his hands. His new show's first episode is scheduled to be shown at ComicCon today and according to a source, the whole…