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Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office

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Ultraprison!
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
benjamin button was a way better movie, IMHO. i LOVED marley & me in book form, and cried like a baby at the end, but for about 90 minutes in the middle it had ZERO PLOT.

course, the tugboat-crew-in-russia thing in BB went on for a good 20 mins longer than it needed to. are film editors on strike????
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ceejeemcbeegee is not here
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
I've had a crush on John Schneider since childhood the Dukes of Hazzard was my favorite show evar but my parents wouldn't let me watch it because of the Confederate Flag and they were racists or something so I had to sneak a watch and he's SO dreamy and I even stopped watching Smallville just because they killed off Pa Kent and yeah it's kinda weird and OMG he has puppies please someone bring those puppies back so John can smile again please!!??!?!11

That is all.
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littlebunnyfoofoo
12/27/08

@ceejeemcbeegee: A secret John Schneider crush? That's something about you I never would have guessed but it's so sweetly charming that I can't stop smiling. You're so cute!

He was definitely foxy back in the day and it went beyond redneck hot.
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lovecake
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Um, Brad's movie played on 1,000 screens less than JA's. So statistically, if you want to get into percentages and shyt, he probably "won".
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dancerevolution
12/28/08

@lovecake:

Actually, Marley and Me earned more per screen too. The difference probably has to do with M&M being rated PG and BB being PG-13 and of a more mature nature.
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MissTicklebritches
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Dear Tom Brady:

Nothing says "I love you" like a MASSIVE carbon footprint! Tom Brady FTL!
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Jinger Jordyn Jayzee
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Marley and Me looks like the equivalent of a golden retriever stuffed between two thick slices of white bread. With snow sprinkled on top.

Who knew that Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston would stoop to a feel-good, holiday season, DOG movie.

STARRING A DOG.

Code blue. Code blue. Career flatlining....
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littlebunnyfoofoo
12/27/08

@jemako: Aw, I think it's nice that there's finally an age appropriate couple represented on screen.

I have low standards.
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mslewis
12/27/08

@littlebunnyfoofoo: In the book, aren't they in their 20s or 30s???
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littlebunnyfoofoo
12/27/08

@mslewis: I mean, the actor and the actress playing his wife are actually near the same age. Normally the actress is a full decade or two younger than her leading man and way too young to have birthed the children she supposedly has on screen.

It has always irritated me.

Because I'm a grumpy old broad.
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AnnoyingFemaleLeadVoiceover
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
As long as were still talking about shit that happened circa 2005, team LC or team Kristin?
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Aesop's Foibles. YES.
12/27/08

@AnnoyingFemaleLeadVoiceover: Kristen got my full support. I don't think it helped much. See "The Hills". I watch it faithfully, but LC has absolutely no personality whatsoever. She's like a fembot.
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shananigans aka angerball
12/27/08

@AnnoyingFemaleLeadVoiceover: Lol. I know sometimes Dirt Bag (and Midweek Madness) reads like USWeekly circa 2005.
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GoldenRatioφ (aka -girl11)
12/27/08

@AnnoyingFemaleLeadVoiceover: Definitely Kristen! Nothing against LC as a person, but at least on her reality shows, she bores the crap out of me.
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gobblegirl
12/27/08

@shananigans aka the patrón push: USWeekly reads like USWeekly circa 2005.
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Aesop's Foibles. YES.
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Don't get me wrong, I have no beef with Mariah. She's got some wicked talent as a singer and she brings her own special brand of harmless cray. (crazy) I always felt like she's be really silly and nice if you met her. However. Whenever her name comes up, I remember this item I read about her once, which of course may not have an ounce of truth to it. At one point, when her oddness was at its' peak, she liked to take all of her meals in her bed, and wore a bib while she ate. And would not deviate from this routine. For whatever reason, this stuck in my mind. Weird.
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

@terribletwenties aka Aesop's Foibles: I have all my meals in bed, but I use my cat as a bib. Is that weird??
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Hazel
12/27/08

@terribletwenties aka Aesop's Foibles: if i could get away with that, I'd probably do the same thing.
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VPea
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: Also cool to use cats and dogs as napkins.
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Aesop's Foibles. YES.
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: No. It's only weird if it's a real bib-the kind a baby would wear. Cats come in handy during foodtime. They can be used as napkins, coasters, or trays. And in certain cases, if you have to get up for any reason, you can use them as chargers to keep your food warm. I've found this works best with hot sandwiches. Let me know of any other uses you come across.
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AthertonMerriweather
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Where can I get tickets to the Shrek musical? I ain't gonna lie to ya, I'd pay to see Smithy read the phonebook.
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
10 bucks says that Mariah will name her kid Butterfly if it turns out to be a girl.
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Penny
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: Yeah, and caterpillar if it's a boy.
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Eeva
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: Butterfly Hello-Kitty Glittering-Stiletto Unicorn Cannon-Carey.
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Eeva
12/27/08

@Eeva: (It's a family name)
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

Butterfly Hello Kitty Glittery Pink Stilleto Cannon-Carey. And then.... when are future generations, Butterfly/Caterpillar Hello Kitty Glittery Pink Stelleto Cannon-Carey I, II, III, etc. It's a classic, timeless name.
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Fridge Hussy : Is finally heading back to uni!
12/27/08

@Samanthrax:

Whatever thet choose, with the last name Cannon, it could sound either ridiculous or sublime.

Eg. Pilot Inspektor Cannon, or Bronx Mowgli Cannon, or Peanut Cannon...

I need sleep and puppies.
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VPea
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: I am pregnant and am waiting to hear what name Mariah chooses so that I can copy it. I dont care if our babies are even of different genders. I just know she's going to pick something nuts!
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Eeva
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
At least two of these items almost made me cry...

...Jesus motherfucking Christmas, what's an instant cure for PMS, someone?
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DangerMouse
12/27/08

@Eeva: I lean towards cookies, sour patch kids, and sleep, but that's just me.
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

@Eeva: Beer and Slayer, but everyone is different.
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Eeva
12/27/08

@DangerMouse: @Samanthrax: Combining some of your suggestions: I'm going to go for a walk with loud, angry music, buy sour cola bottle sweets (the pink and blue ones) and then have hot chocolate with caramel Bailey's when I get back. Thank you.

If that doesn't work, I'm just going to go sob into my pillow until I fall asleep.
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

@Eeva: That sounds good, and I'm not PMSing or hungover or anything! I am on day 6 at the parents' house, though... slowly going mad.
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Ascendo_tuum
12/27/08

@Samanthrax: That comment just put you on my friends list.

I got an iPod gift card for Christmas so I could download 'Reign in Blood'.

And seasons 1 and 2 of Metalocalypse.

And beer.
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sleepyscience
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Whatever.

I respect Brad more because he decided to be with someone with substance, who at least actually takes an interest in the world around her. You know, as opposed to some highlights-obsessed, try-too-hard who somehow manages to remain mediocre in every single aspect.
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Penny
12/27/08

@sleepyscience: Yes, lets act like we know the ins and outs of people simply because they give a few interviews.

Many famous people are incredibly generous but not vocal about it. This is not to dismiss what Jolie has done, at all, but I think that is certainly an unfair statement.
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Samanthrax
12/27/08

@sleepyscience: Holy! You know Jen A? That's so cool. Does she make cookies from the box? She does, doesn't she. That's how mediocre people I know do it.
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Hazel
12/27/08

@sleepyscience: It's too early for me to start the jen/angie war. but since you brought it up..

just because you read magazine articles about these two women doesn't mean you know the ins and outs of what they do why they do. or something. yep, still too early.
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Hazel
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): yes, that's what i was trying to say.
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battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): Angelina retuned her digs for attention from playing with knives and wearing blood vials to galvanting around the world sans makeup and posing with starving people. Yes, she helps but she's a famewhore about doing so. Many other 'celebrities' quietly donate, work, and promote without giving doe-eyed interviews about how they have to 'affect change in the world.' One method doesn't make one a saint, the other doesn't make one vapid and without substance.
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dancerevolution
12/27/08

@sleepyscience:

I come to Jezebel to get away from comments like this. Weighing one woman against another is probably the opposite of the purpose of Jezebel. So, yeah... the point. Ur missing it.
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Understater
12/27/08

@sleepyscience:
::Chuckles:: Harsh, but not without a kernel of truth. Or maybe it's just my Anti-ston bias.
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GoldenRatioφ (aka -girl11)
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): Um, please, clearly much of the judgment was based on the fact that Aniston has gasp, *highlights*. That comes from a place of true wisdom.

@dancerevolution is on the beach, bish.: Agreed. I think this is one of the first headlines pitting Aniston v. Pitt, and not that competition between exes is that fab. either, but it seems more relevant than the whole Aniston v. Jolie tabloid/desperate women drama. Jezebel is not the place I come to see one woman degraded at the expense of another, under the assumption that all women must be fighting against each other over a man.
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mslewis
12/27/08

@battleaxonista: Angelina has been "galvanting" around the world, working with the United Nations since 2002. Her caring didn't just start.

I guess you think "quietly" donating means showing up at charity events, which is what a lot of stars do. Others like to be more hands on. If a famous person shows up at a refugee camp, it means cameras will follow; when cameras follows, so does more money for that cause.
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Penny
12/27/08

@mslewis: No, that is not what it means, but lots of celebrities lend their face to different causes (cancer being a big one, that I've noticed). Just because it's not third world children does not mean it's irrelevant.

I appreciate that we have the Angelina's and the Mia's and the Audrey's, but they are not the only ones helping where they can.
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Scout
12/28/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): seriously, all this "who makes the better donation" bullshit is, well, bullshit

please stop (pretty please with a gumdrop on top)

cease and desist with this childish and ill-informed perennial "debate" regarding these women and the man they happened to have in common.

btw -
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battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Pfff, we bag Aniston for responding to pointed questions concerning the Gods Jolie-Pitt, but nowhere in Pitt's interviews do I see questions that would require him to call his prior marriage a dead end .
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Maritsa
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): I feel like he thinks he's giving a classy, mature answer, and he just sounds like a jackass justifying some shady behavior with self-help book talk.

@battleaxonista: Considering Jen was the cheated-on party, I also give her some more latitude
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Sugar Cochrane
12/27/08

@battleaxonista: I read the whole article, and while I don't feel Pitt behaved particularly honorably towards JA, that quote was about his whole movie-star life, not his first marriage specifically, or at least that's how I read it.
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VegetableServing
12/27/08

@Sugar Cochrane: Maybe, but the line about being a father...
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Interrobanging
12/27/08

@VegetableServing:

I always saw it as Brad and Jen got married and perhaps Brad thought, wow my wife has been on the most famous tv show ever! Maybe she'd like to pause for a moment and have children... But that's not what she did, she had to conquer the movie screen with..Along Came Polly. And if being a father was super important to him and Jen was hindering that then...well what more can he do? Brad & Angelina have said several times they didn't do anything until after Brad was seperated{questionable}, while they do say they fell in love during Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I just don't think Angie is the man stealing wench and Brad the philandering husband..I'm not blaming Jen either but she seems a little...Tracey Flick-ish to me in some ways.
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LipstickLibrarian
12/27/08

@battleaxonista: I'm sure we'll hear how Jen feels about it in tomorrow's Dirt Bag.
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Stabby McStabberson
12/27/08

@LipstickLibrarian: something about "uncool" i suspect.
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littlebunnyfoofoo
12/27/08

@That's Not My Name: Eh, I worked recently with some folks who were on a project with Jen when Brad confessed his affair to her and they said she was completely in the dark.

Girl deserves a medal for how well she held herself together during the whole mess.
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Penny
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
I am beginning to think Brad Pitt should just stop talking. Everything he says seems like a dig.
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ceejeemcbeegee is not here
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): Yeah... I'm peeping that, too.
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mslewis
12/27/08

@Penny Plastic (Archetype): Everything he has said recently IS a dig!! Including bringing his mother and father to his premiere where they held hands with Angelina. He's getting back at the "not cool" and the "consider the source" quotes from that other person. In other words, he's defending the woman he loves. It's obvious if you follow along.
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Scout
12/28/08

@mslewis: last I checked, Angelina was a hormonally mature female aka: woman, whose has also birthed children (which in lame ass society's definition makes her more of a woman than you know who) and doesn't require any defending.

I suppose Saint Brad and Angie are equally as immature as the next person - sorry to burst the bubble
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Ragus
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
Wouldn't an Arrested Development movie be something like the Onion movie? Just an extended version of something that originally was only intended to exist in shorter format? I'd rather see another season than a movie.
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Khrushchev
12/27/08

@laurafin: Wouldn't another season be significantly longer than a movie?
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mslewis
12/27/08

@Khrushchev: I don't mean to sound stupid, but I'm trying to figure out exactly what "Arrested Development" is. I don't get a lot of the cultural references on Jezzie and I usually just move on, but I'm curious about this one.
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Miss Smith Drank Your Vodka
01/05/09

@mslewis: Check it out on Netflix, or your local library may have it (mine does!) Just finally watched Season 1 and am excited for the library to call me when Season 2 is checked in!
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Maritsa
12/27/08

In reply to Jen Celebrates Christmas By Beating Brad At The Box Office
If they need funding for the AD movie, there's always money in the banana stand.
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DangerMouse
12/27/08

@Maritsa: Where *is* bananastand this morning? I imagine that she will be excited.
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