​Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson Wed In Lavish Santa Barbara Wedding

Jessica Simpson and her NFL beau finally married yesterday at the luxurious San Ysidro Ranch resort (apparently where JFK and Jackie spent their honeymoon). Their 1-year-old son Ace was their ring bearer, their 2-year-old daughter Maxwell was their flower girl and was joined by Ashlee Simpson's son Bronx, 5. Oh, and… » 7/06/14 11:30am 7/06/14 11:30am

John Mayer Recorded a Beyonce Cover And It Doesn't Suck

John Mayer has just recorded his own version of Beyonce's "XO" and as much as I'd like to say it made my ears bleed as if I had used a q-tip incorrectly, it's actually quite good. Sure, Mayer doesn't have Beyonce's driving beat (or powerful vocals —I WILL SAY IT), but this version is soothing. It's what you'd listen… » 5/25/14 1:30pm 5/25/14 1:30pm

WHAT: Katy Perry and John Mayer Have Broken Up

Katy Perry and John Mayer have broken up after an endless stream of engagement rumors, one insufferable love song and several gossip site meltdowns prompted by the vision of Katy Perry wearing an extremely large diamond on her ring finger. If anything proves that we live in a dark and chaotic world ruled over by the… » 2/26/14 9:13am 2/26/14 9:13am

American Duke Charlie Sheen Is Engaged (Again)

The Sheen men— Martin, Charlie and Emilio — are a prime example of American celebrity nobility, so, to mock the absurd way actual nobles and royals are still celebrated in certain frivolous, Grinch-shaped (concentrate on the bottom and imagine a Santa cap) islands around the world, we ought to spend this Sunday… » 2/16/14 11:30am 2/16/14 11:30am

Katy Perry and John Mayer's Sickly Sweet Love Roams Free in New Video

"You love who you love who you love," sing John Mayer and Katy Perry in the single they've released together off Mayer's new album, "Who You Love." "You can't make yourself stop dreaming who you're dreaming of." They might as well be singing "WARNING: you're entering a judgment free zone. Prepare to be sapped to… » 12/17/13 10:00am 12/17/13 10:00am

Here's Katy Perry and John Mayer's Moody, Insufferable New Album Art

Katy Perry and John Mayer have unleashed upon the unsuspecting world the album art for their duet "Who You Love." In it, John Mayer looks like the most irritating person in your freshman year dorm, all pensive with an acoustic guitar. Katy Perry is a face and some limbs in a sea of velvet. » 12/03/13 9:10am 12/03/13 9:10am

The Best Tales from Former Groupies of Reddit

Ah, to be a groupie. You have a sex-thing with a famous person one time (or a few times) and then you get to lug the memory around like a precious treasure for the rest of your life, until your senescence is marked by the crowing of your descendants: "Grandma, Adam Levine was sent to the outer space garbage-colony… » 11/18/13 7:00pm 11/18/13 7:00pm

Snooki Wants to Arrange a Baby-Marriage Between Lorenzo and North West

Okay, so, sometimes I write hyperbolic joke headlines, just for fun, in an attempt to make the mundane activities of celebrities even marginally interesting, but not this headline. Not this one. THIS ONE IS 100% BIG NATURALS. Snooki literally wants her little baby Lorenzo to go on a date with little baby North West » 10/15/13 8:00pm 10/15/13 8:00pm

Understanding Katy Perry's New Album According to Its Tracklist

Katy Perry has released the tracklist for her new album Prism: Through the Prism I Can See It All and It Is Good, also known as just Prism. Since Perry recently said that all her songs are "real-life moments" and that she can "only write autobiographically", these song titles are more than just songs. They are "the… » 10/01/13 12:00pm 10/01/13 12:00pm

Kim Kardashian Hits Paris in First Post-Baby Peplum

Kim Kardashian has donned her first post-baby peplum in the service of Concept Outfits Everwhere. This dress was custom-made by Riccardo Tisci and an army of Parisian wood sprites (probably) in just one day, and, fittingly, she wore it to the Givenchy show in Paris. It's the first time Kim and Kanye West have made a… » 9/30/13 9:14am 9/30/13 9:14am

Hot: Jax Teller Might Be Christian Grey in the Fifty Shades Movie

Supposedly Sons of Anarchy actor Charlie Hunnam is now Universal's first choice to play Christian Grey in Fifty Shades of Grey. Generally speaking, casting rumors are no fun — unless they involve a really hot person whose .gif you can blow up to four times its size and share on the Internet. You're welcome. » 8/21/13 9:00am 8/21/13 9:00am

Of Course Lindsay Lohan's Being Accused of Partying All Night

Bleh. Seven days out of Cliffside, where Lindsay Lohan served her 90 days of court-ordered rehab, she has allegedly been spotted partying with her friend-and-occasional-hookup Max George and sister Ali in Los Angeles. The party went all night, and a "source" (a pigeon? That disgusting oil heir Brandon "Firecrotch"… » 8/09/13 9:00am 8/09/13 9:00am