John Cleese will star alongside former Baywatch stars Pamela Anderson and David Hasslehoff in a film version of the 90s TV series. But there's a catch—the filmmakers can't use the name "Baywatch" in the film. At all.

John Cleese turns 74 today, which is great because it gives us all an excuse to enjoy this clip from the Life of Brian and contemplate all the wonderful things the Romans have done for us.

We already informed you of the upcoming Pitt/Jolie vs. Theroux/Aniston matrimonial potato-sack race late last night, but figured it was news worth repeating.

• Whitney Houston is having daily prayer meetings to get her through this difficult time. She has said of her imperfect show in Birmingham:

Today in Tweet Beat, Michael Lohan is like school in summer—he's got no class. Also, Denise Richards implies that she'll one day spill the beans about all of Charlie Sheen's bullshit, and Jay Manuel's tan is real.

• Avril Lavigne has officially filed for divorce from Sum 41's Deryck Whibley.

• Jon Gosselin brought his daughter a birthday cake that read, "Happy Birthday Maddy" today. The only problem? Her name is spelled "Mady." But it's not "Johnathon's" fault: Entertainment Tonight ordered the cake for him.

• Late last night, TMZ published a report claiming that Maya Angelou had been taken to the hospital. However, a CNN news editor,Saeed Ahmed, posted on his Twitter page that Angelou's literary agent says the hospital rumors are false. [DetroitFreePress]

• Last night, David Letterman revealed that a CBS News employee is accused of trying to extort $2 million from him because he had sexual relationship with female employees.

• Nene of Real Housewives Of Atlanta has written an autobiography called Never Make The Same Mistake Twice. She gets real snippy about her "friend" Kim Zolciak, saying:

• Angelina Jolie, as you may know, was in Baghdad yesterday. Saint Angelina walked through a makeshift settlement where 20,000 displaced Iraqis live, and said:

• A rep for Chastity Bono—the child of Sonny and Cher—confirms that Bono is in the initial stages of transitioning from female to male.

• The National Enquirer claims that Mel Gibson sat his kids down and informed them that his Russian girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, is pregnant with his child, and they aren't too happy about it.

• Rihanna was the big show-stopper at the Met Ball: Celebs cheered when she took the stage to perform. And! At an after-party, guess who RiRi was in deep convo with?

• Ladies and gentlemen: Mickey Rourke is reportedly dating Courtney Love, and has been for a few weeks. Somehow this makes perfect sense. [Telegraph]

• Etta James says when she was ripping Beyoncé about singing "At Last" for the President, "I didn't really mean anything…"

• Miley Cyrus is seen "slanting her eyes" in a picture that's been circulating on the web.

• Amy Winehouse must be coming to her senses: she's given control of her £15 million fortune to her parents. She can't spend her own money without their approval, so drugs are probably out. [Mirror]