Duck Dynasty Scion Sadie Roberston Praises HIM for Her Rumba

On Tuesday night, Sadie Robertson (of the Duck Dynasty Robertsons) performed a pretty impressive rumba on Dancing with the Stars. But first, she took some time to thank the man upstairs, posting on Instagram: "ALL glory to God for this amazing journey." That amazing journey being, of course, her participation in … » 10/22/14 1:50pm 10/22/14 1:50pm

Kirk Cameron Will Have You Know Halloween Is a Christian Holiday

Kirk Cameron recently popped by my favorite Internet publication, the Christian Post (it's like HuffPo mated with a church newsletter!), for a little chat about his upcoming motion picture release, Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas. And he had a message for you believers: Halloween is totally OK to celebrate, because… » 10/21/14 6:30pm 10/21/14 6:30pm

Fuck Santa! Kirk Cameron's New Movie Gives Baby Jesus His Birthday Back

Let me tell you guys my idea of a perfect Christmas. You wake up like it's any other day—it might not feel like December 25, it might even feel like, say, August 27—you go to work, you eat your sandwich, you shoulder life's banality with the resignation of a much older woman, and then...someone sends you a link. You… » 8/27/14 11:30pm 8/27/14 11:30pm

'Gospel of Jesus's Wife' Is the Real Deal, According to Science

A fragment of papyrus that refers to Jesus's wife—that was immediately shot down as a fake by the Vatican in 2012—has been tested by scientists at Columbia University, Harvard University and MIT, who all conclude that the ink and papyrus are very likely ancient and not a modern a forgery. » 4/10/14 10:50am 4/10/14 10:50am

Woman Sees the Face of Jesus in Her Dirty Messed Up Toe

An Albuquerque area woman says the face of Jesus Christ has appeared on her toe and healed its wounds. Paula Osuna was just minding her own business when she fell down the stairs and totally jacked her foot. When bandaging it up, she asked her fiancee to rub some holy dirt from El Santuario de Chimayó (a Catholic… » 1/29/14 3:50pm 1/29/14 3:50pm

Sarah Silverman and Jesus Sat Down for an Honest Talk About Abortion

Late the other night, comedian and activist Sarah Silverman was visited by none other than Jesus Christ himself. The purpose of this drop-in? Jesus is sick of people using his name to spread intolerance and oppression and he wants Silverman to help him in getting folks to cut it the fuck out. After the mission was… » 1/22/14 4:30pm 1/22/14 4:30pm

Dear Lana Del Rey: You Are Not a Latina Gangsta Girl, So Cut the Shit.

Sadcore singer Lana Del Rey recently released “Tropico,” a 27-minute art film/music video, and the first image I saw was of the white artist dressed as a woman bearing many of the stylistic hallmarks associated with Latino gangster culture (right down to the teardrop tattoo). Now, was that a polite way to start my day? » 12/10/13 7:40pm 12/10/13 7:40pm

The Anteater Baby Jesus Forgives You For Touching Yourself

Last month, Armani, a lady anteater at the LEO Zoological Conservation Center, gave birth to little Archie and mystified zoologists/the world, who had taken it upon themselves to cockblock Armani from their male anteater, Alf. Time-wise, Armani would have conceived when Alf was safely locked away in a separate pen. » 5/18/13 5:30pm 5/18/13 5:30pm

Pregnant Woman Fired for Having 'Premarital Sex'

After it was discovered that she was pregnant, Teri James, an unwed 29-year-old woman, was fired from her job at San Diego Christian College for having premarital sex. As bullshit as it sounds, the school did have the right to terminate James — she had signed an employee contract that stated that "sexually immoral… » 3/04/13 5:10pm 3/04/13 5:10pm