'Gospel of Jesus's Wife' Is the Real Deal, According to Science

A fragment of papyrus that refers to Jesus's wife—that was immediately shot down as a fake by the Vatican in 2012—has been tested by scientists at Columbia University, Harvard University and MIT, who all conclude that the ink and papyrus are very likely ancient and not a modern a forgery. » 4/10/14 10:50am 4/10/14 10:50am

Woman Sees the Face of Jesus in Her Dirty Messed Up Toe

An Albuquerque area woman says the face of Jesus Christ has appeared on her toe and healed its wounds. Paula Osuna was just minding her own business when she fell down the stairs and totally jacked her foot. When bandaging it up, she asked her fiancee to rub some holy dirt from El Santuario de Chimayó (a Catholic… » 1/29/14 3:50pm 1/29/14 3:50pm

Sarah Silverman and Jesus Sat Down for an Honest Talk About Abortion

Late the other night, comedian and activist Sarah Silverman was visited by none other than Jesus Christ himself. The purpose of this drop-in? Jesus is sick of people using his name to spread intolerance and oppression and he wants Silverman to help him in getting folks to cut it the fuck out. After the mission was… » 1/22/14 4:30pm 1/22/14 4:30pm

Dear Lana Del Rey: You Are Not a Latina Gangsta Girl, So Cut the Shit.

Sadcore singer Lana Del Rey recently released “Tropico,” a 27-minute art film/music video, and the first image I saw was of the white artist dressed as a woman bearing many of the stylistic hallmarks associated with Latino gangster culture (right down to the teardrop tattoo). Now, was that a polite way to start my day? » 12/10/13 7:40pm 12/10/13 7:40pm

The Anteater Baby Jesus Forgives You For Touching Yourself

Last month, Armani, a lady anteater at the LEO Zoological Conservation Center, gave birth to little Archie and mystified zoologists/the world, who had taken it upon themselves to cockblock Armani from their male anteater, Alf. Time-wise, Armani would have conceived when Alf was safely locked away in a separate pen. » 5/18/13 5:30pm 5/18/13 5:30pm

Pregnant Woman Fired for Having 'Premarital Sex'

After it was discovered that she was pregnant, Teri James, an unwed 29-year-old woman, was fired from her job at San Diego Christian College for having premarital sex. As bullshit as it sounds, the school did have the right to terminate James — she had signed an employee contract that stated that "sexually immoral… » 3/04/13 5:10pm 3/04/13 5:10pm

The Number of Americans with No Religious Affiliation Jumps from 8…

Slowly but surely, America's godless heathens are multiplying. According to a new Pew poll, one in five Americans reports no affiliation with any established religion—so that covers agnostics, atheists, the "spiritual not religious" crowd, and just general IDKs. That's up from 8% just two decades ago. » 10/09/12 7:15pm 10/09/12 7:15pm

Jesus Waits 2,000 Years to Casually Mention He's Married

So you met this really nice guy, and it's been going great. You talk all the time, he really seems to "get" you, you've let him into your heart, you've been getting into some pretty kinky shit (not to go all TMI, but there's some cannibal roleplaying involved). And then, yesterday, out of nowhere he just sort of… » 9/19/12 11:20am 9/19/12 11:20am

Elderly Woman Who Botched Fresco Restoration Is Quickly Becoming an…

Cecila Giminez, the Spanish woman who took it upon her humble self to "restore" a 100-year-old fresco in the church of her home village of Borja, has attracted the ridicule of many internet art critics, who have called her, um, reimagining of fresco Jesus both hedgehog- and monkey-like (a howler monkey, if we're… » 8/27/12 9:30am 8/27/12 9:30am