ISIS Fighters Apparently Love McDonald's and Junk Food

Because "Death to America" only applies if we're not talking about McDonald's, Froot Loops, and (this is my favorite) New York-style Bagel Chips. » 3/14/15 5:15pm 3/14/15 5:15pm

CPAC Gay Casual Encounters Craigslist Ads Are Too Perfect to Be True

The annual Conservative Political Action Conference, which functions kind of like a Gathering of the Juggalos for Rick Santorum superfans, is currently underway in Washington. Also underway? CPAC attendees placing ads for gay casual encounters on Craigslist. Maybe. » 3/07/14 6:30pm 3/07/14 6:30pm

New Jersey Catholic School Makes Girls Swear Not to Swear, Lets Boys Do…

Following in the grand tradition of Catholic hypocrisy and misogyny, the girls at Queen of Peace High School in North Arlington, NJ were asked to take a no-cursing pledge on Friday while their male classmates looked on, blinking like the bemused rescue greyhounds the Pope flagellates every time he stubs his toe on a… » 2/03/13 1:00pm 2/03/13 1:00pm

Meet the Pro-Life Tea Party Congressman Who Pressured His Mistress to…

Right now, you're going to want to dust off your Horrible Hypocritical Human Garbage Bingo cards; I have a feeling this story could finally be your lucky round. Tennessee Tea Party Congressman Scott DesJarlais, who ran for Congress on a FAMILY VALUES PRO LIFE IN GOD WE TRUST JESUS IS HUGGING AMERICA WITH HIS MEATY… » 10/10/12 3:50pm 10/10/12 3:50pm

The Most Conservative States Have the Pregnant-est Teenagers

Brace yourselves for drama camp-levels of feigned surprise. Turns out that the states most likely to support "family values" conservative legislation contain the teenage girls most likely to have babies. See? Abstinence-only education works. » 9/28/12 6:00pm 9/28/12 6:00pm

Megachurch Pastor & Author of Marriage Advice Books Fired After Getting…

Jack Schaap, an Indiana megachurch pastor with a finely tuned Sincerity Face, has been fired after he was caught sincerely sucking face with a girl who was not his God-endorsed wife. The good news is that the girl appeared to consent to the makeout sesh. The super, extra gigantic bad news is that according to some… » 8/02/12 4:30pm 8/02/12 4:30pm

Insulting Michelle Obama Totally Fine, Insulting Ann Romney Totally Out…

Breaking! Mitt Romney changed his mind about something! Remember earlier this year, when a liberal commentator made that remark about Ann Romney being a stay at millionaire's wife who hadn't worked a day in her life? And remember how everyone leapt to defend Mrs. Romney because, to be fair, having five kids is kind… » 7/30/12 5:40pm 7/30/12 5:40pm

Maker of Plan B to Hold Big Contraceptapalooza Fundraiser for Mitt…

Zygotes are more important than women, but money is more important than zygotes. At least if you're Mitt Romney. The staunchly unstable politician, who holds the mistaken (but convenient) belief that the morning after pill causes abortions, will be holding a big, fancy fundraiser at the Florida home of the chairman of… » 5/09/12 12:00pm 5/09/12 12:00pm

Governor Who Cut Funding for Sexual Assault Victims Has Son Who Was…

On Friday, Arizona Governor Jan Brewer signed a law that bars state funding from going to any organization that provides abortion services. This means that Planned Parenthood, which doesn't use state money for abortions, will be deprived of funds they would have used to provide all manner of sexual health services,… » 5/07/12 3:55pm 5/07/12 3:55pm

Feminists May Not Always Be Ugly, But They Make Terrible Girlfriends,…

Unintentional hilarity machine Phyllis Schlafly issued a dire warning to cadets at the Citadel yesterday, explaining to students that they should never, ever, under any circumstances, even in case of emergency or possible decapitation, date a feminist. What makes them even more dangerous is that nowadays, you can't… » 4/05/12 6:15pm 4/05/12 6:15pm

Rick Santorum's Wife Used to Shack Up with an Abortion Provider

Rick Santorum's wife Karen has long been an ardent ally of her husband's political career. She's given birth to seven children and home schooled the lot of them so he could go off and do his politicking. She's written about how important it is to be pro life, even in the case of rape and incest. But did you know that… » 1/16/12 5:50pm 1/16/12 5:50pm

Serial Wife-Leaver Newt Gingrich Vows to Defend Marriage

Philandering windbag Newt Gingrich stands a chance at nabbing the Republican Presidential nomination, and in courting the conservative voters he needs to win, he's endorsed a "marriage pledge." Politicians who sign the pledge vow to defend marriage by making sure that marriage is federally defined as between one man… » 12/13/11 11:10am 12/13/11 11:10am

Republicans Worried Women Won't Vote For Assholes

With the once overcrowded field full of potential Republican Presidential candidates growing more sparse and morally tarnished by the day, some strategists are worried that women might hesitate to vote for whichever of the remaining jagoffs the GOP nominates. And because women vote in larger numbers than men and they… » 12/02/11 11:10am 12/02/11 11:10am

Sex-Obsessed Tabloid Horrified By Library Porn

The New York Post enters the debate over First Amendment protections versus community concerns, mostly by issuing high moral outrage. It clearly prefers that you look to its own prurient pages for titillation, hypocrisy optional. » 4/25/11 12:47pm 4/25/11 12:47pm

The Exorcist Anti-Birth Control Priest's Sex Scandal

A Catholic priest who regularly conducted exorcisms and said gay marriage would end human civilization has explained why he no longer heads a major anti-choice group: He had an affair with a woman. But, he says, she's an adult! » 2/02/11 4:14pm 2/02/11 4:14pm

New Jersey Pastor Who Told Congregation that Facebook Encourages…

Mmm. Adultery to the tune of a three-way relationship with his wife and another male employee of his church. And it goes down nice and smooth. » 11/21/10 4:50pm 11/21/10 4:50pm

Paladino's Pesky Little Porn Habit Resurfaces

Carl Paladino told Orthodox rabbis earlier this week that he would "seek ways to protect everyone from obscenity on the internet." How inconvenient for a fresh round of porn forwards to surface. Including girl-on-girl action. But that's not gay, right? » 10/14/10 12:16pm 10/14/10 12:16pm

Sister Wives Husband "Sickened" By Idea Of Wife With Another Man

Last night on Sister Wives, Kody and his first wife, Meri, celebrated their 20th anniversary with a fancy dinner, where Meri asked, "If I were to be giving my attention to another guy, how would it make you feel?" » 10/11/10 1:04pm 10/11/10 1:04pm

Relationship Advice From Megachurch's Alleged Molester Pastor

Four men have accused muscle shirt-wearing, homosexual conversion-preaching multimillionaire megachurch pastor Eddie Long coercing them into sex, repeatedly. Incidentally, Long wrote a whole book about sexual purity and women's submission to men. We read it so you don't have to. » 9/27/10 3:55pm 9/27/10 3:55pm