Humans 100,000 Years in the Future Will Look Pants-Pissingly Scary

Hey, have you ever wondered what people will look like thousands and thousands of years after you've decomposed to dust and everyone has forgotten your name? Well, wonder no more — thanks to the magic of computers, we now have what one pair of researchers claims is a picture of how our great great great great great… » 6/10/13 4:00pm 6/10/13 4:00pm

Not Pooping Your Pants Is One of Life's Greatest Accomplishments

Fact: Nobody wants to hear about potty training. Even though it's arguably one of the biggest milestones in a human's life ever — not pissing/crapping yourself for at least some period of time is basically a requirement to be in the autonomous world, without which it would be pretty darn hard to accomplish other… » 1/22/13 5:40pm 1/22/13 5:40pm

Your Evening Cry: Adorable Blind Puppy Is Newest Member of Albuquerque…

Here's a story to warm the icy cockles of your heart. Weeks ago, several teammates from the Isotopes, Albuquerque's minor league baseball team, were volunteering at an animal shelter in Rio Rancho, New Mexico. While there, pitcher John Ely met and fell in love with a 6-month-old German shepherd mix named Stevie… » 6/27/12 6:40pm 6/27/12 6:40pm

Ingrid Newkirk Is The Worst Person In The World

PETA — the animal-rights organization whose media strategy seems to be three parts B-list celebrities, one part fake blood, and five parts boobies — co-founder Ingrid Newkirk wrote an op-ed today defending the use of "sexy women in our ads." » 1/21/10 4:20pm 1/21/10 4:20pm

PETA's Treatment Of Women Is A Joke

On the heels of this tacky Nia Long ad, the Onion News Network has produced a so-realistic-it's-almost-not-funny-but-still-funny video (embedded after the jump), in which a "women's rights group" protests PETA's treatment of women. One protester says: » 8/13/09 2:20pm 8/13/09 2:20pm