• Jezebel
  • celebrity
  • sex
  • fashion
  • Profile logout login

#holidays

Jezebel

Share Cancel
   
Upload an image | Add an image URL
×

logging in
  • FAQ. Include # before tag:
  • #tips,
  • #snapjudgment,
  • #groupthink,
  • etc.

New York, 3:18 PM
Mon Nov 9
40 posts in the last 24 hours

Tip your editors:
tips@jezebel.com

Editor-in-Chief:
Anna Holmes
Email | Twitter

Deputy Editor:
Dodai Stewart
Email | Twitter

Senior Contributing Editor:
Tracie Egan
Email | Twitter

Contributing Editors:
Anna North
Email | Twitter
Sadie Stein
Email | Twitter

Reporter:
Irin Carmon
Email

Editorial Assistant:
Margaret Hartmann
Email | Twitter

Contributors:
Jenna Sauers
Email
Rich Juzwiak
Email | Twitter
Lizzie Skurnick
Email

Interns:
Katy Kelleher
Twitter


Weekends/Commenter Moderator:
Hortense
Email | Twitter

SUBSCRIBE TO Jezebel RSS

New: Breaking news and daily top stories via email
1770 Subscribers
Jezebel
  • posts about #holidays more →

    An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future

    Labor Pains

    Has Anyone In History Ever Had A Successful "Staycation?"

    Why Is This Night Different From All Other Nights?

    Christmas Pageant Kids: Or, Who Gets To Be The Virgin?

    The Twelve Days Of Douchebags

    Saturday Night Nostalgia

    Ultimate Terrible Gift Guide: Part 2

    Tyra Audience Forced To Wear "Unemployed" T-Shirts During Holiday Show
  • Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.
    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of LittleDogLaughed LittleDogLaughed
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Dear Christmas,

    Halloween is the last bastion of creepy kitsch. Only at Halloween will your average department store carry giggling, walking electronic brains, gangrene make-up kits and fake blood by the bucket full. Have you ever tried to find fake fangs off season? I'm just asking. Be grateful to me.

    Americans love to celebrate their ids. Thanksgiving? Food id. St Patrick's Day? Alcohol id. Christmas? Commercialism id. But Halloween is the only holiday that celebrates creativity, and not just that, but the sinister-yet-corny impulses that lie in the hearts of all of us.

    Some people are going to make it a holiday about sex, or alcohol, or convincing their boss that they give a damn about company culture. But some of us spend 364 days every damned year wishing we were wearing green face-paint and scaring the bejeebies out of little kids. Don't take that away from us.

    Yours, &c,
    Halloween #halloween
     Reply
    katie.scarlett.o'hara promoted this comment LittleDogLaughed was starred LittleDogLaughed was unstarred
    Image of Snowbunny Snowbunny
    10/25/09

    @LittleDogLaughed: Dear Halloween and Christmas (and Easter, also, Thanksgiving's pie),

    No matter what anybody claims, you're simply vice-ridden holidays content on celebrating gluttony of processed sugars. The children who pee themselves in excitement over you end up peeing themselves in pain as their cavities are filled by greedy dentists who rush the job in order to get back to their boat.

    You should be ashamed of yourselves and the diabetes you sow. ASHAMED.

    What exactly do you expect me to do with porous, nasty little children's teeth? I will never finish my ivory city with all of you ruining my tiny little bricks.

    Sincerely,

    The Tooth Fairy #halloween
     Reply
    Snowbunny was starred Snowbunny was unstarred
    Image of tiredfairy tiredfairy
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    I had our pre-Halloween party last night. Watched Dawn of the Dead, Nightmare on Elm Street Part 3, Critters 2, and House 2. Made eyeball cupcakes.

    My back porch looks like cemetery/horror lab. My living room has a pumpking with a steampunk hat and goggles on.

    I'm pretty sure it's Halloween all year round at my house. #halloween
     Reply
    tiredfairy was starred tiredfairy was unstarred
    Image of JessIsElf-ity JessIsElf-ity
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Dearest Halloween,

    I shall never turn on you. You will always be my favorite, even if I don't usually get presents. It's ok though, because I get to turn my frontyard into a graveyard and you are the one time during the year when I can wear shirts and hair bows featuring ghost and bats and not get odd looks. No matter how commercial you get, take solace in knowing that we true Halloween-lovers will always do it right and do it the best.

    Love,
    Elf-ity #halloween
     Reply
    Dictator for Life promoted this comment JessIsElf-ity was starred JessIsElf-ity was unstarred
    Image of Dictator for Life Dictator for Life
    10/25/09

    @JessIsElf-ity: You don't usually get presents? So sometimes you do? How can I finagle this? I always appreciate a good gift-giving holiday. #halloween
     Reply
    Dictator for Life was starred Dictator for Life was unstarred
    Image of JessIsElf-ity JessIsElf-ity
    10/26/09

    @Dictator for Life: Well, usually my family just sends me the little Halloween village scenes- you know, the little ceramic-y decorative ones? People also give me things with bats on them because I collect those as well. My advice? Find something Halloween-related to collect, tell everyone, then sit back and wait!! #halloween
     Reply
    JessIsElf-ity was starred JessIsElf-ity was unstarred
    Image of Rooo sez BISH PLZ Rooo sez BISH PLZ
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    They should have gotten Carol Kane to play Christmas Future, instead of Christmas Present, and had her read this. #halloween
     Reply
    Rooo sez BISH PLZ was starred Rooo sez BISH PLZ was unstarred
    Image of prettycool prettycool
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Don't listen to them, lil 'ween. The most wonderful time of the year is obviously October. You got crisp cool weather, my birthday, and you! Where I get to eat candy, dress up, party on down with friends and watch scary movies.

    Seriously, you rock. Don't change.

    Love, PC #halloween
     Reply
    prettycool was starred prettycool was unstarred
    Image of allnighter allnighter
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    As an Angeleno, I already dread the coming of Halloween. The massive West Hollywood Halloween celebration, to which more than a million revelers journey, is a total nightmare. The festivities are one of those terrible/fun things that you can't miss, even when you don't want to go.

    I miss trick-or-treating! Does anyone have a toddler I can borrow for the night? #halloween
     Reply
    NewsBunny promoted this comment allnighter was starred allnighter was unstarred
    Image of NewsBunny NewsBunny
    10/25/09

    @allnighter: My 'hood in Queens hosts the annual CHILDREN'S Halloween Parade. All kids. It's massive, and it's a hoot and a half.

    It should be for kids! #halloween
     Reply
    NewsBunny was starred NewsBunny was unstarred
    Image of NewsBunny NewsBunny
    10/25/09

    @allnighter: My 'hood in Queens hosts the annual CHILDREN'S Halloween Parade. All kids. It's massive, and it's a hoot and a half.

    It should be for kids! #halloween
     Reply
    NewsBunny was starred NewsBunny was unstarred
    Image of veronykah veronykah
    10/25/09

    @allnighter: And this is my 3rd year in LA and I have yet to make it to the WeHo festivities despite wanting to go SO badly!
    Working Halloween this year too...no parade for me.
    The parade in NYC is one of my favorites! #halloween
     Reply
    veronykah was starred veronykah was unstarred
    Image of sangmo sangmo
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Yes, I'm not impressed that people are beginning to "do" Halloween earlier and earlier. My neighbourhood is infested with bloody masks *this*weekend!

    All I want to do is roll my eyes.

    ps. I only give real fruits to the kids. NO candy :) #halloween
     Reply
    happy macrophage promoted this comment sangmo was starred sangmo was unstarred
    Image of happy macrophage happy macrophage
    10/25/09

    @sangmo: That sounds expensive! In my parents' neighbourhood, they give out candy to about 100 kids before they turn their lights off for the night. While the thought of 100 apples is mouth-watering to me, I don't think their pockets would appreciate it :) Kid-sized candy bars and chip bags are about all they can handle. #halloween
     Reply
    happy macrophage was starred happy macrophage was unstarred
    Image of sweet_communist sweet_communist
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    I just spent a couple hours at an upscale, outdoor shopping "town centre" surrounded by more dogs than I have ever seen – dogs in costumes, at that! Halloween will always be dear to me, for it means I get to witness a pair of long-haired dachshunds in banana costumes, a great Dane dressed as a delicate fairy, and a burly English bulldog dressed in a jailbird costume to match the little girl walking him. Long live Halloween! #halloween
     Reply
    TexasCrude promoted this comment sweet_communist was starred sweet_communist was unstarred
    Image of Dictator for Life Dictator for Life
    10/25/09

    @sweet_communist: I saw a teeny-tiny dog wearing an actual Wonder Bread bag today. It took me a minute to realize that it wasn't a DIY raincoat, but a costume. Either way, though, it was the cutest thing! #halloween
     Reply
    Dictator for Life was starred Dictator for Life was unstarred
    Image of sweet_communist sweet_communist
    10/26/09

    @Dictator for Life: I hope they didn't use an extension cord to tie on the bag: [achewood.com] #halloween
     Reply
    sweet_communist was starred sweet_communist was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Personally, I find candy corn disgusting, and don't even let me get started on that gut wrenching, saliva and germ fest known as bobbing for apples. Trust. #halloween
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of jenniferhill jenniferhill
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Wow, thank you. That more or less is how I'm feeling this year... I'm already so sick of Halloween that I was sick of it in August. #halloween
     Reply
    hortense promoted this comment jenniferhill was starred jenniferhill was unstarred
    Image of hortense hortense
    10/25/09

    @jenniferhill: Me too, sadly. And I love Halloween. #halloween
     Reply
    hortense was starred hortense was unstarred
    Image of BearDownCBears BearDownCBears
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    This year I'm giving out chocolate covered teas bags, fer 'MURRICA, dammit. #halloween
     Reply
    BearDownCBears was starred BearDownCBears was unstarred
    Image of DramaClub DramaClub
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    I will never turn my back on you, Halloween. You have always been my favorite even since before my mom honored us both with a hand-sewn butterfly costume in the second grade that was so good it made Melissa Apodaca burst into jealous tears. You will be mine, always.

    Love,
    DramaClub
     Reply
    hortense promoted this comment Edited by DramaClub at 10/25/09 4:41 PM DramaClub was starred DramaClub was unstarred
    Image of andBegorrah andBegorrah
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    If only they would set aside their differences and combine their powers to beat the shit out of Valentine's Day. #halloween
     Reply
    andBegorrah was starred andBegorrah was unstarred
    Image of badmutha badmutha
    10/25/09

    @andBegorrah: You wish! Everyone knows that there is a secret alliance between Mother's Day, Father's Day, and Valentine's Day, presided over by that evil force known as "Hallmark." Though Christmas has tried, it will never beat their combined strength, even with Halloween. #halloween
     Reply
    badmutha was starred badmutha was unstarred
    Image of Dodgergirl Dodgergirl
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future

    Jack doesn't know how to respond to this. (Also, that was freaking awesome, Hortense) #halloween
     Reply
    Dodgergirl was starred Dodgergirl was unstarred
    Image of anya629 anya629
    10/25/09

    In reply to An Open Letter To Halloween From The Ghost Of Christmas Future
    Dear Halloween and Christmas,

    You have over-expanded into markets that are too broad. Your strategy has focused too much on tacky gifts and drugstore decorations. Halloween, you especially really had a shot at competing with me, but you neglected to focus on what people enjoy buying and consuming most. Soon your festive bubbles will burst and people will remember the most important commercial aspect of holidays: SWEETS! Chocolate, baked goods, and all forms of sugar-coated goodness. Soon I will assume my long-deserved ranking as the most cherished (and profitable) holiday. You have been warned.

    xoxo,
    Sweetest Day #halloween
     Reply
    andBegorrah promoted this comment anya629 was starred anya629 was unstarred
    Image of Rooo sez BISH PLZ Rooo sez BISH PLZ
    10/25/09

    @anya629: *rolls on floor* #halloween
     Reply
    Rooo sez BISH PLZ was starred Rooo sez BISH PLZ was unstarred
    Earlier threads | All threads | Show hidden threads | Show featured threads only | Start a new discussion

Login

Enter your username and password.

Please enter a username.
Please enter your password.
logging in
Login via Facebook | Sign Up | Forgot Password?

Reset Password

Please enter your email address to have your password reset.

Please enter your email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
requesting password reset

Register

Registering will give you a user profile and the ability to add other users as friends. To become a commenter, however, you need to audition.

Want to know more? Consult the Comment FAQ and legal terms.

Please enter a username.
Please enter a password.
Please confirm your password.
Passwords are not identical.
Please enter a valid email address.
registration sent, waiting for reply

Submit Your Comment

You don't need to login to comment. Just enter your email address below.

See how your address will be displayed in the Comment FAQ.

Please enter a valid email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
logging in

Login with your Facebook or Jezebel account.

Sign up here.



  • Archives
  • About
  • Advertising
  • Legal
  • Help
  • Report a Bug
  • FAQ
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.