Squee! This morning on Today, Hoda and Kathie Lee met two baby goats from the Stamford Museum and Nature Center in Connecticut that had been named Hoda and Kathie Lee.

Re-watch your VHS of the Oscar-winning Julia Stiles rom-com The Prince And Me, because Prince Harry is on our shores and hearts are motherfucking AFLUTTER. Michelle Obama and Jill Biden surprised their guests at a White House Mother's Day ceremony when the Royal Ginger Apparated in front of the crowd.

This morning on Today, while discussing personal grooming, Kathie Lee said she believes landing strips are "just wrong." Of course, she said this before finding out that bestselling author and Peabody Award-winning journalist Hoda has one. Apparently KLG just does minor grooming of her garden. But what happened after…

No! The wonderfully batty, tipsy holy duo of Hoda and Kathie Lee are boiling with resentment thanks to that classic American triptych of greed, geography and sheer carnal impulse. (I may have thrown that third one in.) Apparently Kathie Lee has been lobbying to move Today to Los Angeles for quite some time, and her…

So James Franco deep-throats a pistol in J.K. Rowling's newest novel, James Franco and The Cavernous Sexual Ambiguity the upcoming Harmony Korine film Spring Breakers. Details interviews Franco this month, and its reporter recalls another instance of a Franco onscreen blowjob in his NYU student film The Broken Tower.

In this edition of Tweet Beat, Hoda is taking a break from wine, Amber Riley has a cute haircut, Carrie Brownstein witnesses a sad rejection and Rachel Maddow and Greta Van Susteren are friends in their off hours.

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Jessica Biel is apparently shit-flippingly threatened by the continued close relationship between exes Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz. She wasn't too psyched when they worked together in Bad Teacher, and recently Diaz did an interview in which this happened:

Well Ann Curry's lukewarm butt-heat hasn't even begun to dissipate, but her replacement has already been announced: the Today Show's chipper-but-mellow-and-quite-good-humored-and-I-don't-really-know-much-about-her third-hour news lady Savannah Guthrie. "NBC sources tell us, Savannah will be anchoring with Matt Lauer…

After Beyonce was photographed hanging out with Kim Kardashian at a "Watch the Throne" concert in Birmingham, UK over the weekend, throngs of fans took to Twitter to express their outrage. "Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian in the same picture let alone the same sentence is tragic," said one. "if your role model is Kim Kardashian, …

It looks like Hoda Kotb is emerging as the favorite to take over for Ann Curry, who is supposedly leaving/being kicked off of NBC's Today A-team. A source said, "Hoda scores off the charts in focus groups, and the audience can relate to her," which seems like just the sort of thing morning show producers rub their…