Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow’s guide to living your best juice-cleansed, chambray life, is taking yet another step to mentor the unwashed. Tomorrow the company launches the first installment of its apparel collection, Goop Label.

We all like to make fun of Goop, but we’re the ones talking about it while Gwyneth Paltrow is wiping her ass with a $275 roll of toilet paper. Yes, please, mentor me, milady.

Here is a new entry into the “weird things celebrities spend actual money on while the only savings account I have is the jar of change on my desk” category: a masseuse who gives deep-tissue massages to stars like Kanye and Katy Perry—with her teeth.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have finally, finally finalized their divorce, a process matched in length and absurdity only by that endless runway in the acclaimed film Fast & Furious 6. Because nothing pleases me more than comparing Earth’s most meticulously manicured divorce to a Vin Diesel franchise about…

It’s hard to believe that it has been an entire year since Jennifer Aniston sold her most unflattering pair of Chloé cork wedges on Goop.com, but as time marches relentlessly on, so too does Goop. La Gwyneth has done it again, managing to separate her extremely wealthy friends from their free designer swag (“there are…

On Tuesday evening, a Page Six reporter named Oli Coleman published a story entitled “Gwyneth Paltrow called out for being a ‘backstabber’” in which he revealed the profoundly boring news that Julie Klausner, comedian and star of Hulu’s Difficult People, called the Goop founder one of the “phoniest ‘backstabbers’ in…

Rapper Lil Wayne was hospitalized last week after his epilepsy reared its head and caused an especially severe seizure.

Goop is hip and current and with it. They will soon be sending out lifestyle advice via Snapchat to weed-smoking teenagers everywhere.

Congrats to our Lady of Goopelupe, who is now officially divorced from Chris Martin, even though he never signed her divorce petition. Not because of laziness, but because of tactics.

Last week, I tried to imagine what sort of advice Goop, health bible for Gwyneth stans, might promote in its first-ever sex issue. It finally came out on Monday, and I think that I was impressively close.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Mandy Moore are NOT signed on to co-star in a romantic comedy about a young special events baker who becomes friends with a 40-something divorcée after she’s hired to to make the wedding cake for the ex-husband’s upcoming nuptials (though—call me, Hollywood—they definitely could be), but they are…

Beyoncé, like many of us, is an Airbnb user. This means those among us who are part of the sharing economy have at least one thing in common with her, which is a fun thing to consider. The similarities, however, begin and end with the name “Airbnb,” because Bey is not renting that quaint little lakeside home filled…

Chris Martin—in conjunction with a Rolling Stone cover shot that screams “LOVE ME!” and “wyd...” at the same time—says he once wrote a song for Beyoncé that she rejected because it was bad.

In this month’s Glamour, Gwyneth Paltrow talks about her current amicable relationship with Chris Martin, saying that her ex-husband has become “more like my brother.” We’ll assume she means it in a weird Flowers in the Attic way because those two—as we all recall fondly—have fucked at least twice.

Monday evening, View From the Top star and cookbook author Gwyneth Paltrow posted a video of a sunset to her Instagram account. She captioned it, “La puesta del sol,” and added a Mexican flag emoji. Was she in Mexico? Where was she staying? Is Gwyneth conversational in Spanish? Two of those questions were answered…

Gwyneth Paltrow, actress turned entrepreneur whose 1999 episode of SNL is one of my personal favorites, recently lost nearly $200,000 in merchandise in what has come to be known as The Great Goop Heist of 2015. When discussing the burglary with her mother, actress turned Goop ambassador Blythe Danner, Paltrow…

When I walked into the GOOP MRKT on its opening day, I was shocked by how quiet it was. There was a single security guard standing in the store. To the left of the main entrance, the pop-up’s resident baristas spoke quietly amongst themselves. By the living room, three girls, white, probably in their twenties, with…

Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle brand for close, personal friends of Gwyneth Paltrow, has been robbed! MRKT, the company’s pop-up shop in New York City, was burgled of “a very limited number of items” totaling more than $173,000.

Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow remain friendly, despite their decision to “consciously uncouple” last year. (By the way, doesn’t it feel like that phrase has been around since the beginning of time?) The two exes have even paired up for a song on Coldplay’s upcoming album.

Long long loooooooong before Kim Kardashian “broke the internet” with that Paper cover featuring her pouring champagne into her butt, Gwyneth Paltrow broke the internet by pouring verbal champagne into our collective butts. At least, that’s the way our Lady of Goopelupe tells it.