Woman Eats Period Blood, Gets Showered in Hot Fountain of Vomit

Happy Monday! If you're having a bad day, I've got just the thing to make it better: A chilling (well, very warm, actually) tale of a woman who swallowed her own blood clots while trying to perform fellatio upon her partner. And then he Roman showered her. How does that even happen? Let me paint you a picture. » 12/08/14 5:30pm 12/08/14 5:30pm

Hideous 'Border Patrol Sex' Series Pornifies Rape of Migrant Women

Good god: a vile new porn series called "Border Patrol Sex" features a fictionalized version of the rape and exploitation that many Mexican and Central American women experience while crossing the U.S.-Mexico border. Up to 80 percent of migrant women and girls are raped during their border crossing, by the traffickers… » 12/05/14 11:30am 12/05/14 11:30am

America Has Some Critical Questions About the Return of SURGE

Thanks to the endless wheedling of the Internet, SURGE, the disgusting beverage that fueled my high-school debate team's dumbest, most ridiculous antics, has been resurrected for sale exclusively on Amazon. And now a bunch of people are amusing themselves by posting absurd questions and even more ludicrous answers on… » 10/20/14 3:20pm 10/20/14 3:20pm

Eating in Bed Is Turning Your Sheets Into a Bug Paradise

Eating in bed seems like a pretty normal activity. We have all done it at some point. And now that it's getting colder and Unsealed: Alien Files is available on Netflix, there is nothing better than curling up in bed with a TV show and a snack. The comfort and convenience of eating in bed is almost enough to make you… » 10/13/14 1:30pm 10/13/14 1:30pm

NBC News Producer Uploaded Secret Sex Tape of Girlfriend to Porn Site

Ladies and gentlemen: we have found him. It's the worst boyfriend in the world. He's real! A digital producer working for NBC News has admitted to secretly taping sex himself having sex with his girlfriend on Valentine's Day and uploading the video to a porn website, where it remained for several months until she… » 9/09/14 4:15pm 9/09/14 4:15pm

Broccoli Stench and Brown Filth: Don't Leave Your Diva Cup in Too Long

There are so many ways that a romantic night under the stars can go wrong: Birds can poop on you, monsters can crawl out of the sea to eat you, your mom could call in the middle to tell you about her anal polyps. A vagina exploding with menstrual blood, however, is a completely new one. » 9/03/14 5:30pm 9/03/14 5:30pm

The 10 Grossest Sex Acts as Described By Urban Dictionary

Have you ever played "what's grosser than gross?" a childhood game where people try to outdo themselves in grotesque scenarios until one person gives up? Let's play it now with the horrifying knowledge that somewhere, somehow, people may have actually done the shit I'm about to tell you. Sometimes with literal shit… » 8/28/14 12:40pm 8/28/14 12:40pm

Man Masturbates at Panera, Manager Offers Traumatized Victim a Cookie

Today in unmitigated horror and maddening fuck-ups, a customer at a DC-area Panera Bread alleges that a man approached her in the store, exposed himself, and began masturbating in her direction. When she alerted a manager—and pointed out her assailant, who was leaving the store unchallenged—the manager declined to… » 8/20/14 7:45pm 8/20/14 7:45pm

'Logging' Is the Revolting New Poop Craze That Must. Stop. Now.

Poop ruins everything. And at the Holiday Village Red Sea resort in Egypt, it's ruining everyone's vacations. Because British tourists (probably members of One Direction) are finding fun and merriment by relieving themselves of their lunch in the still blue waters of the resort pools. Is it a trend? Well, the hotel is… » 8/12/14 4:30pm 8/12/14 4:30pm

Man Seeks Girls To Host Fantasy Football Draft, Possibly While Topless

The cool bro you see above is, according to this Craigslist post, looking for two girls to host his upcoming fantasy football draft. All he needs is a couple of girls to run the draft board, serve the fellas some drinks, and, you know, wear a bikini or some sexy lingerie and maybe even pop those tops off—I mean, no… » 7/30/14 4:13pm 7/30/14 4:13pm

4,000 Pounds of Beef Recalled for Mad Cow Disease, Some at Whole Foods

Another day, another two tons of beef-meat riddled with brain-eating prions! The USDA has ordered a recall of over 4,000 pounds of beef because of a "remote" risk of mad cow disease contamination. Some of the beef—which is in the form of bone-in ribeye roasts—was being sold at Whole Foods. Just another reminder that… » 6/13/14 6:50pm 6/13/14 6:50pm

Homeschooled Girl Kicked Out of Prom Because of Leering Dads

In case you weren't already convinced that most high school dress codes are sexist bullshit meant to police young women's behavior along totally arbitrary guidelines, this story should do it for you: a 17-year-old girl was publicly chastised and kicked out of a homeschool prom in Virginia because several dads in… » 5/13/14 2:15pm 5/13/14 2:15pm