Girl Scouts Turn Down $100K After Donor Demands Trans Discrimination 

In May, the Girl Scouts of the United States of America announced that their organization is officially open to transgender girls. Soon after, the Girl Scouts of Western Washington received a large donation of $100,000 with this caveat: “Please guarantee that our gift will not be used to support transgender girls. If… » 6/30/15 11:30am 6/30/15 11:30am

Girl Scouts to Release New Cookie Flavors, Blow Your Goddamned Mind

The Girl Scouts are coming and this year, they are going to fuck up everything about your life with three new cookie flavors—two of which are gluten-free. Paging Phyllis Neffler, how many boxes will you be selling this year? More importantly, how many boxes can I eat without incurring diabetes? Because, let me be real… » 1/05/15 3:20pm 1/05/15 3:20pm

Obama Breaks All the Rules, Wears a Tiara With the Girl Scouts

So much for "not putting things on your head if you're president." Obama broke his own rules (but not the rules of fashion, which demand a tiara on all occasions) by putting on a Tiara to pose with the girl scouts. I don't know, I'd put on a tiara too — if they weren't already required here — for a couple of Samoas. » 12/25/14 2:30pm 12/25/14 2:30pm

Fed Up With the Slutty Girl Scouts? Meet the Conservative Alternative.

Want your daughter to learn all about camping, sewing and car repair, but with a heaping helping of Jesus? You could try to find a local Girl Scout troop with an especially Bible-thumping troop leader. Or you could just skip straight to the American Heritage Girls, conservative Christianity's very own copycat. » 3/06/14 1:05pm 3/06/14 1:05pm

Finally: The Girl Scout Cookie Finding App of Your Dreams

In the old days, childless adults who wanted to get their Thin Mint on would have to seek out Girl Scout Cookies the ancient way: by approaching strange children on the street and asking them if they had any cookies, or by hanging out near elementary schools after the closing bell rang in hopes that one of the little… » 2/24/14 6:20pm 2/24/14 6:20pm

A Bunch of Pro-Lifers Are Trying to Boycott Girl Scout Cookies

Pro-lifers are mad that maybe, possibly, someone at the Girl Scouts of the USA could've conceivably obliquely hinted that Wendy Davis isn't literally Satan. Consequently, a Texas pro-life group is attempting to rally the pitchforks for a boycott of Girl Scout cookies. Attempting to punish a bunch of 10-year-olds over… » 1/30/14 6:00pm 1/30/14 6:00pm