This Father's Day, Remind Your Partner Where the Baby Came From

It has been about three years since I stopped working in men’s lifestyle media, but during the two weeks leading up to Father’s Day, I still get a lot of emails from PR people pitching “perfect gifts” for my old employer’s Father’s Day Gift Guide. Gifts for every “type” of dad: the sports-fan dad, the grill-obsessed…
Charlie Sheen: Denise Richards a 'Heretic Washed Up Piglet Shame Pile'
In honor of Father’s Day, the mild and graceful Charlie Sheen took to Twitter in order to compliment his ex-wife and mother of his children, Brooke Mueller. Then, turning his attention Denise Richards, his other ex-wife and mother to his other children, he let fly lines of misogynist, free-verse vitriol.
Justin Timberlake 'Flexin' on Father's Day
Justin Timberlake celebrated Father’s Day with his new son Silas, an adorable child who, with that name, is destined to grow up to be a nineteenth-century villain (truly, not even Charles Dickens could have picked a better name than Silas Timberlake). “FLEXIN’ on Father’s Day,” Timberlake captioned the photo. Perhaps…
Let's Hear It For Goofy Dads

It’s Father’s Day, so let this be the year we all finally recognize that dads and their goofy dad stuff—monster faces, silliness, mockery; perhaps even dad jokes, if the judges are feeling lenient—could be as essential to childrearing as any of that mom stuff. Or, at least, that a Platonic ideal of “mom” is not the…
You Don't Have Daddy Issues But Your Piece of Shit Father Might
Until recently, I’d never been on the website AskMen.com, I suppose largely because I never had the occasion to ask a man anything. The site’s tagline touts that it is a place where men can become better men, though on my first visit I’m already suspicious that any of my questions will be answered or that I will…
How to Talk About Suicide on Father’s Day
This Father’s Day, as with every Father’s Day, Facebook is going to become a cascade of carefully chosen, lovingly captioned dad photos. Many will be painted over with the static of age. A “dad bod” joke or two will worm its way in. And several posts will inevitably be dedicated to those dads that have passed, who…
Canadian Politician Thinks Moms Change Diapers, Dads Shape Minds
Mother's Day and Father's Day exist to honor the hard-working parents among us. They're also a great occasion for fucking up, if you don't watch yourself. Canadian Justice Minister Peter MacKay is learning that the hard way, after sending male and female staffers two vastly different messages about their roles as…
Happy Father's Day, Mom!
This year I finally bought one of those mini souvenir Oscar statues that they sell all over Los Angeles. They're fitted with witty, positively biting plaques such as "Best Stoner," "Hottest Wife," and "Coolest Cody," (who the hell knows any cool "Codys," let alone "Coolest"?). As truly side-splittingly hilarious…
#EndFathersDay Was Brought To You By Trolls
If you were paying attention to Twitter earlier today, you might have been more perplexed than usual by one of the trending hashtags. By midday, #EndFathersDay was awash with Proud Twitter Reasonables who simply couldn't believe that Twitter Activists Had Gone Too Far in calling for Father's Day — in supporters' eyes,…
Experiencing Father's Day without a Father
I never remember when it is Father's Day —it's always a surprise. It just creeps up on me and reminds me that I've never really had a father. Well, one worth celebrating anyway. I didn't meet my father until I was 17 years old and by then, I felt like I didn't need him anymore or maybe he was just a disappointment,…
As TV Dads Go, Danny Tanner Is Way Worse Than Don Draper
Now, in the dying embers of Father’s Day, we should take the opportunity to kick a few lukewarm coals around and consider important cultural representations of fatherhood in television, because nothing is more important than television. Nothing. TV dads are usually pretty flawed (TV moms, too), because parental…
By the Way, Lots of Dudes Aspire to Be Dads
Yes, yes — we all know that the highest calling for women in fascist countries is to birth beautiful, stout baby-soldiers for the State, but a new, conveniently-timed Father’s Day poll suggests that lots of men want to be dads one day. In fact, just about as many men as women aspire to carefully guide an infant…
A Father's Day Message from Louis de Bernières: Moms Can't Rough House
British writer Louis de Bernières — a man whose name is so tantalizingly close to “Béarnaise” that, repeated enough times, it will drive you mad with hunger — availed himself this Father’s Day of a media pulpit from which he could decry the institution that wreaks the most psychic destruction on children (particularly…
Father's Day Miscellany For Those Of Us With Deadbeat Dads
I used to work at a popular women's magazine where I once pitched a guide to brides with dads who weren't dead but weren't around — I'd never seen anything like that before, and I figured there had to be a lot of women (myself among them) who were confused about the etiquette. Do you ask some 50-something dude you've…
What I'd Like for Father's Day: An Open Letter to My Daughter
No ties, please. No cufflinks or gift certificates. No presents at all, really.
Kid, if you're struggling for some last-minute token for Father's Day, here's what I'd really like — this year and for years to come:
I want you to know there's no end game. The sports you play, the colleges you get into, the accolades you…
