In the article is says that she previously "received a warning [from Facebook] after posting a picture of herself backflipping out of the vagina of a giant female statue"...
She leads a much more interesting life than I do. #facebook
@JZee: Yikes. No, not something I would buy for myself!! But then, I never wore pasties and a thong whilst pregnant and I can't do backflips either!! ;) #facebook
Why on earth would she want to post her naked body all over her poor FB friend's feeds anyway? If I had a friend who started posting naked photos of him/herself all over the place, they'd be de-friended immediately. Do not want! Gah!
Start your own blog, post a link to it in your FB status and say: "If you want to see me naked and pregnant and covered in goop, click here." Simple, right? FB doesn't HAVE to allow pregnant boobs to be shown any more than they HAVE to allow nonpregnant boobs to be shown. I'd rather not have any boobs in my feed at all, if I want to see boobs I can go to plenty of other places and see as many as I like. As it is, I don't want to, so I don't...
Though I do wish they'd lighten up on breastfeeding photos, in particular the photos that don't have any visible nipple in them... that's just silly... all you can see is a big baby head anyway. But that's totally different from this issue so I digress. #facebook
@TurtleSpeak: I agree. It seems she should display her images in a different forum where such restrictions do not apply. If she disagrees with the policies regarding nudity, she has every right to delete her account and take her membership elsewhere. #facebook
I don't know that the picture should be disallowed, but I do know that if one of my Facebook friends pulled a bush league (heh.. bush) stunt like this, they would be deservedly reported directly to Lamebook. My morality is governed by the principle that you can do what you want, but I have a right to point out the fact that it is lame. #facebook
To be fair, it does kind of look like she's being spewed on by a giant schlong, but other than that--or in spite of that, actually--I don't know what the hell their problem is. If they see no issue with posting photos of actual illegal activity, this shouldn't be anything to anyone. #facebook
@TheFormerJuneBronson: I was trying to figure out a polite way to say "it does kind of look like she's being spewed on by a giant schlong" and you nailed it. Definitely had a bukkake vibe goin' on. #facebook
@femme-bot: I think the thong is painted on. This is too much nudity for the newsfeeds of her co-workers, high-school classmates, cousins, and siblings. #facebook
@Dictator for Life: The article says she's wearing a "thong bikini bottom".
Is it too much nudity for people she knows? Who knows...who cares.
Is it against facebook's rules and are they allowed to delete? Yeah. #facebook
I'm one of those people who have no interest in even Googling someone, and I hate it when someone Googles me. I've had cashiers and baristas, total strangers who saw my name on my debit card, Google me and find out my age, my address, look at my house, read obituaries I'm listed in where the deaths were tragedies I'd like kept private, and so on. It's grossly intrusive. I realize this is how we live now but I'm sick of people knowing intimate details about me that I haven't told them. None of which I "put out" there - I don't do social networking, but a lot of stuff is online regardless. And when someone has a crush on you, or is jealous of you, it's scary how much info they can come up with.
I think as with many things, prevalence starts equating acceptability after a while. Personally I feel it's undignified and also destructive to people who get really obsessive about it. If I found out someone hacked into my voice mails or otherwise spied on me, I would pursue the most severe legal means possible to punish them. Privacy is becoming a lost concept. #aliwise
Excellent analysis, Jenna. I can definitely relate to the underlying tendency to obsess over people who meant a great deal to me in the past and are no longer in my life. Most 0f us wouldn't go nearly this far, but I can understand the impulse. Most likely once she overcame the initial ethical hesitation and hacked into the first voicemail, it was easier to justify the next one, and so on until she became compulsive. I'm sure on some level she felt shame for what she was doing all along. Kind of an amplified version of what I feel when I google that one mysterious ex for the bazillionth time, despite being in a happy relationship. #aliwise
one interesting thing i feel like no one's touched on is that Jenna is focusing on people who cheated on her -- i feel like in those kinds of cases, there is more impetus to know about the other woman, sort of as a way of finding an explanation for why the person you cared about hurt you. and i also think being cheated on can make it easy to fall into a feeling-bad-about-yourself cycle, and if that is how you are dealing with being cheated on, learning more about the person your bf cheated with can help provide fuel for that (especially icky) fire. #aliwise
I cannot stop checking my boyfriend's ex's Facebook page. It drives me crazy but I can't stop doing it.
I also have a friend who I broke off contact with a few months ago - she does nothing but post annoying updates on her page. I took her off my news feed so I could just move on with my life and stop being obsessive - and yet I still go and check her page when I'm on Facebook. It's crazy. Why do we do this stuff? #aliwise
Why would you want to stalk your ex's new thing online? What does that do for you? How is obsession and brooding adding anything positive to your life? Once or twice, maybe, but a thousand times? I've seen this in articles here on Jez a lot, as confessionary reporting, and I don't think it's something to be proud of. I don't know if it's "normal" or "average" because I don't have that many friends to poll, but from a psychological standpoint, I think that every time you give in to that impulse, you're digging yourself deeper into hatred and self-loathing. there's got to be something better you can do with your time that isn't so self-absorbed and spawning of negativity.
@BytheSea: I don't think that Jenna is arguing that it does add anything positive to her life. I think the point here is that it both interests and frightens her that she can find any common ground with someone whose behavior she clearly acknowledges is reprehensible--which is to say, not at all positive. #aliwise
@tewkesbury: Your interpretation makes sense, but this sentence . "Because she's facing up to four years in prison for the kinds of acts that, while most of us would not have committed, might, if we're honest with ourselves, have at least considered." makes it seem like Jenna is speaking on behalf of most women. Perhaps she is right and maybe BytheSea and I are exceptions to the rule? Personally, I've operated on the it's your loss, buddy line of thinking/behavior, but my experience isn't everyone else's either. I guess I wonder if *most* women do feel the urge like Jenna. Someone should do a study. #aliwise
@msmoneypenny: it is an interesting question, and you make a good point. While I'll admit that I don't have your Give a Shit Switch (which you should totally market), I also can't say that I've ever considered electronically stalking anyone. And having been on the receiving end of jealous-woman-stalking, I also don't feel especially kindly inclined toward Ali Wise. #aliwise
@BytheSea: Well, I read celebrity gossip, so I suppose I like gossip and sometimes I'm interested to see what goes on in an old friend or ex's life. It's definitely lame, but checking an ex's facebook page, or looking at photos of him with his new girlfriend doesn't strike me as wrong, because it's out there for the public to see. It's not like facebook is some secret diary, or a very private place, and what you want to keep private, you can. Of course, I've been extremely lucky not to have any acrimonious breakups, so I am genuinely happy and interested when exes are happy. But I'm sure I would do the same in the case of a horrible breakup too. But none of this justifies going into someone's private e-mail, or voicemail box, because that is clearly meant to stay private. #aliwise
Anyone remember that Keeping Up with the Kardashians episode where Kim hacked into Khloe's man's voicemail? I hope for them that the whole thing was fake, because I don't think Kim (or Ali Wise) would make it very long in the big house. #aliwise
I'm surprised she has time for anything else. Just the amount of time she's spent listening to the phrase "New message from xxx-xxxx at x:xx PM, Press 1 to go to main menu" must add up to at least several episodes of Mad Men. #aliwise
I can't relate to this behavior at all. This is psycho behavior. Are "most people" actually sitting around "considering" these kinds of acts? If so, that is freaking scary. #aliwise
I can't empathize because to do so would mean that I'm validating stalker-like behavior, and I just can't do that. Facebook-stalking, google-stalking, all of that is just a slippery slope for one really off-balance person to do something dangerous. #aliwise
@dangerslut: Eh. I wouldn't place Facebook- and Google-stalking in the same category as this. I tend to do a lot of web-stalking for no real reason other than if information is out there, I like to have it -- and I always draw the line at information that isn't freely available. If you have to hack into it, or pay for it, it isn't your information to have. #aliwise
11/04/09
She leads a much more interesting life than I do. #facebook
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/05/09
11/05/09
11/04/09
Start your own blog, post a link to it in your FB status and say: "If you want to see me naked and pregnant and covered in goop, click here." Simple, right? FB doesn't HAVE to allow pregnant boobs to be shown any more than they HAVE to allow nonpregnant boobs to be shown. I'd rather not have any boobs in my feed at all, if I want to see boobs I can go to plenty of other places and see as many as I like. As it is, I don't want to, so I don't...
Though I do wish they'd lighten up on breastfeeding photos, in particular the photos that don't have any visible nipple in them... that's just silly... all you can see is a big baby head anyway. But that's totally different from this issue so I digress. #facebook
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
Is it too much nudity for people she knows? Who knows...who cares.
Is it against facebook's rules and are they allowed to delete? Yeah. #facebook
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
11/04/09
10/21/09
I think as with many things, prevalence starts equating acceptability after a while. Personally I feel it's undignified and also destructive to people who get really obsessive about it. If I found out someone hacked into my voice mails or otherwise spied on me, I would pursue the most severe legal means possible to punish them. Privacy is becoming a lost concept. #aliwise
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
I also have a friend who I broke off contact with a few months ago - she does nothing but post annoying updates on her page. I took her off my news feed so I could just move on with my life and stop being obsessive - and yet I still go and check her page when I'm on Facebook. It's crazy. Why do we do this stuff? #aliwise
10/21/09
I hate myself for caring that much and then I hate myself more for picking her apart. This can't be healthy. #aliwise
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/22/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09
10/21/09