Carson Thinks Loss of Gun Rights Would Be 'More Devastating' Than Actual Death 

In a Facebook Q&A on Monday, presidential candidate and real-life zombie Ben Carson wrote that while he’d “spent many a night pulling bullets out of bodies,” he “never saw a body with bullet holes that was more devastating than taking the right to arm ourselves away.” »10/06/15 11:10amTuesday 11:10am

Florida Man Once Killed a Goat & Drank Its Blood, Would Like to Be Your Senator 

Augustus Sol Invictus, a 32-year-old lawyer, is running to replace Marco Rubio in the U.S. Senate. In recent days, he’s had to convince his voter base that the fact he once sacrificed a goat and drank its blood shouldn’t sway them against him. He’s also had to deny allegations that he’s a neo-Nazi or that he wants to… »10/05/15 1:10pmMonday 1:10pm

Hispanic Chamber of Congress Says Trump Pulled Out of Meeting to Appease Anti-Latino Base

The US Hispanic Chamber of Commerce, the biggest Latino business organization in the country, says Trump agreed to participate in a Q&A this month but cancelled out of nowhere because, the Chamber posits, he was afraid of alienating the frenzied anti-Latino masses that form much of his base. »10/02/15 4:00pm10/02/15 4:00pm

Jeb Bush Won't Try to Win Over Black Voters with 'Free Stuff' Like Welfare

Republican presidential candidate Jeb Bush told crowds at the East Cooper Republican Women’s Club annual Shrimp Dinner in Mount Pleasant, S.C. (an event and town that both sound fictional) that he will earn the support of black voters with “hope and aspiration” and not with “free stuff,” i.e. universal healthcare or… »9/25/15 5:20pm9/25/15 5:20pm

Stephen Colbert Gets Bernie Sanders All Riled Up on The Late Show

While tonight’s Late Show interview with Bernie Sanders was absent any of the respective tears or deep, deep discomfort that characterized Colbert’s two biggest moments so far (and at least compared to every other candidate interview we’ve seen), Sanders still manages to leave you with the impression that the man is… »9/19/15 11:15am9/19/15 11:15am

Bernie Sanders Spent Rosh Hashanah Trying to Teach Evangelicals About Inequality  

Shanah Tovah from Lynchburg, Virginia, where Bernie Sanders just gave a beautiful, thoughtful speech on income inequality to the student body of Liberty University, an evangelical college that calls for “a strong commitment to political conservatism [and] total rejection of socialism.” »9/14/15 5:10pm9/14/15 5:10pm

Hillary Clinton Spoke to Black Lives Matter Protestors, Has Zero Solutions

Presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton spoke to Black Lives Matter protestors during her campaign stop in New Hampshire last week, but don’t give her a cookie just yet. In the short conversation, the candidate who’s often described as too practiced came across relaxed and more unfiltered than normal—but still… »8/20/15 2:40pm8/20/15 2:40pm

Fox News Announces the Ten Candidates for Thursday's GOP Debate

And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy. And the beast which I saw was like unto a leopard, and his feet were as the feet of a bear, and his mouth as the mouth of a lion: and…

»8/04/15 8:45pm8/04/15 8:45pm

Breaking: Deez Nuts Up 8 Percent in the Polls Against Clinton & Trump

Presidential candidate Deez Nuts, who filed in Iowa last week on the independent ticket, already has a slight edge in the polls. Public Policy Polling has found that despite much of the country’s unfamiliarity with Nuts’s platform, a full 8% of Americans say they would vote for him over Clinton and Trump. »8/04/15 6:10pm8/04/15 6:10pm