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How to Tell the Difference Between All the Dudes Running for President

Now that 7,000 American men and several drunk farm animals have officially declared their candidacies for President, keeping track of them has never been more confusing or difficult. Luckily, we’ve put together a “cheat sheet” with “quick trivia” to help the political layperson discuss with confidence the nuances of… » 7/22/15 1:45pm 7/22/15 1:45pm

Jeb Bush Thinks Lazy Americans Just Need to Work Longer Hours

Jeb Bush, in a concise summation of the mythical bootstraps ethos, told reporters at New Hampshire’s Union Leader that Americans need to work longer hours—despite the fact that Americans already work longer hours than citizens in any other industrialized nation. The hopeful future President of a country dealing with a… » 7/09/15 1:00pm 7/09/15 1:00pm

J Balvin Dumps Miss USA Gig After Trump's 'Mexicans Are Rapists' Comment

J. Balvin, an award-winning, Colombian-born reggaetonero who’s quite popular in the United States as well as internationally, has pulled out of his Miss USA performance in protest of Donald Trump’s ongoing racism towards Mexicans and other Latin Americans. “Ay vamos,” indeed. » 6/25/15 11:10am 6/25/15 11:10am

Would You Vote for Hillary Clinton Based on Her Spotify Playlist?

Hillary Clinton, Presidential candidate and purveyor of millennial-targeted merchandise, is fully ready to take this election thing by storm. And as everyone knows, to run for President, you have to have signature jams to back you up. Hillary just don’t stop thinkin’ about tomorrow. » 6/15/15 1:50pm 6/15/15 1:50pm

Florida Residents, Circa 2005: Oh No, Jeb Bush Loves Porn!

Jeb Bush’s decision to release *all* his emails is still biting him in the ass: messages from the mid-2000s indicate that the former Florida Governor invested over a million dollars of pension funds of his constituents in Movie Gallery, a national film rental company that yes, rents pornographic films. Yes, Jeb Bush… » 5/08/15 3:30pm 5/08/15 3:30pm

Proposed Walker Budget Would Slash Funds to Child Victims of Abuse

Here’s your semi-regular update on how Scott Walker—Wisconsin governor and possible future president of the United States of America—is attempting to drag his state into the ground. In a recent budget proposal, Walker suggests removing $238,000 worth of funding to child advocacy centers, a move so depraved that even… » 5/07/15 6:40pm 5/07/15 6:40pm

Would You Vote for Waka Flocka for Prez? Cause He's Running (Kinda)

In case you missed the 13 million tweets (and probably texts) reminding you, yesterday was 420. For the occasion of the holiday of our lord (Lord von Weedman), one of the world’s most dedicated herbalists announced his candidacy for president. That man is Waka Flocka Flame. » 4/21/15 2:10pm 4/21/15 2:10pm

America Still Loves the Unbreakable Hillary Clinton

According to a new Gallup poll, Hillary Clinton is owning the other potential 2016 Presidential contenders when it comes to favorability. Fortunately for Clinton, not enough people care enough about the fact that she also owned the server she used to send personal and professional emails back when she was Secretary of… » 3/13/15 2:30pm 3/13/15 2:30pm

WTF: GOP-Approved Button Calls Hillary Clinton a Fried Chicken Special

We've got awhile until election 2016 season really heats up, but that hasn't stopped some members of the GOP from bracing themselves against a potential Hillary Clinton run. One strategy: getting merch out there to the masses, like a button that reads "KFC Hillary Special: 2 Fat Thighs/2 Small Breasts...Left Wing." » 10/08/13 10:00am 10/08/13 10:00am

Republicans Want NBC, CNN to Drop Hillary Clinton Features -- Or Else

The Republican National Committee has threatened to cut NBC and CNN out of future political debates if the two networks don't stop fangirling over Hil and cancel their upcoming Clinton programming, which RNC chairman Reince Priebus called political ads "masquerading as an unbiased production." » 8/05/13 6:30pm 8/05/13 6:30pm

Watching Steel Magnolias Makes Him Cry: Cory Booker Is Just Like Us

Because we can't stop, won't stop with the Bookerdemonium, New York magazine brings us some more reasons why we'd love to cuddle up to Mayor Handsome. (And there are, alas, reasons why we really wouldn't.) Either way, there's no denying that the man is a political star; every person with a Twitter account wants to be… » 11/09/12 11:15am 11/09/12 11:15am