Sheriff: Tonya Couch, Mother of 'Affluenza' Teen, Complained About Subpar Jail Accommodations

Tonya Couch, the mother of “affluenza teen” Ethan Couch, was brought back to Texas Thursday after going on the lam in Mexico with her kid and getting caught for ordering shitty pizza. Tarrant County Sheriff Dee Anderson said Friday he was forced to tell her jail was “not a resort” after she complained about being…
Ethan Couch, Affluenza Teen, Apprehended Near Puerto Vallarta, Mexico
Affluenza afflictee Ethan Couch has been apprehended with his mother, Tonya, by Mexican officials near the resort town of Puerta Vallarta.
Florida Woman Texts 'Drunk Driving Woo' Before Fatal DUI Accident
Mila Dago is a 24-year-old woman from Miami who, in August of 2013, was going through a rough breakup, according to the Miami Herald. Driving a rented SmartCar in the wee hours of the morning after a night of partying, Dago sent her ex a slew of messages, the last of which were “Driving drunk woo,” “Ill be dead thanks…
Father of Drunk Driver Blames 'Lack of Fathers' For Baltimore Riots
On conservative talk radio host Laura Ingraham’s show today, senator and presidential candidate Rand Paul blamed the riots in Baltimore on “the breakdown of the family structure” and “a lack of fathers,” among other things. Rand Paul’s own son has been arrested three times on alcohol-related charges, including assault.
Mother Sues Police for Taking Nude Photos of Daughter after Car Crash
After nearly five years, trial is set to begin next week in a lawsuit filed by the family of Jessica Mejia, a 20-year-old Chicago woman killed in a car crash caused by her ex-boyfriend. Mejia’s family is suing the Cook County Sheriff’s Office for allegedly undressing Jessica’s body after the crash and taking nude…
At Long Last, Here's Video of Justin Bieber Peeing in a Cup
Biebsters, the wait is over, the day of your deliverance is nigh. The Miami Police Department has just released video of Justin Biebmus Christ Himself pissing into a cup after his drunk driving arrest earlier this year. Fortunately (or unfortunately, weirdos), they blurred out his Bienis. But you still get the point.
Reese Witherspoon's Husband Gets DUI; She Asks Cop: Do You Know My Name!?
Reese Witherspoon and her husband Jim Toth (co-head of motion picture talent at CAA) were pulled over in a Ford Focus (!?) on Friday at midnight in Atlanta. Toth was weaving between lanes; turns out he was drunk driving. Witherspoon was annoyed, and then angry, and finally started throwing her name around. The…
San Francisco Archbishop-To-Be and Noted Bigot Salvatore Cordileone Arrested for Allegedly Driving Drunk
The Rev. Salvatore Cordileone, a vigorous opponent of same-sex marriage in California and the Roman Catholic archbishop-elect of the San Francisco area, was pulled over and arrested Saturday on suspicion of driving under the influence at a DUI checkpoint near San Diego State University, in a neighborhood of bars and…
Horrible Parents Drive With Their Four Kids Strapped to the Car
If you thought Mitt Romney's infamous tale of strapping his dog to the car roof and taking it for a terrifying, high speed cruise down the highway, then wait until you hear what a terrible mother and father from Indiana did. On Monday, the couple was seen strapping their four children to the
roof
hood of their car…
Note To Parents: Your 9-Year-Old Can't Be The Designated Driver
Last spring, serving children alcoholic beverages at chain restaurants was all the rage in child endangerment, but it seems we may have a horrible new trend on our hands. For the second time in a month, a father has been arrested for putting his 9-year-old child in the driver's seat when he was too drunk to drive. …
This woman jumped from a moving car into a tree to avoid police
Bystander Saves Woman's Life; She's Mad He Damaged Her Car
After Taylor Cole Vanderhook, who's charged with DUI, drove into a Delaware canal, Chris Sullivan dove in and broke her windshield, saving her from the sinking car. Her response: "Dude, I'm gonna kill you — you broke my car."
Dangerously Precocious 12-Year-Old Girl Arrested For Drunk Driving
A 12-year-old girl was arrested in Minnesota after cops caught her drunk driving late Saturday. Apparently, she ended up behind the wheel after a 19-year-old man she met at a party asked her to drive him home.
