​Usher Is Finally Going to Show Justin Bieber Some Tough Love

Since Justin Bieber was discovered at the age of 13, Usher has had the immense burden of being a mentor-like figure to Bieber. In a recent interview, Usher has claimed that now that Bieber's something of an adult, their relationship is "more man-to-man now," and that he'll be ready to dole out some tough love when… » 10/26/14 11:41am Sunday 11:41am

Drake Celebrates His Birthday With Video Games, a Very Bad Shmoney Dance

Aubrey "I was looking forward to a nice tuna sandwich on a bagel" Graham celebrated his 28th year on this Earth by borrowing one of Bill Cosby's sweaters and throwing a party at an adult arcade in Times Square, which weirdly is exactly how I would expect a young Canadian multimillionaire to spend his money. » 10/24/14 7:20pm 10/24/14 7:20pm

Drake's Newest Cosign Dej Loaf Raps Sweetly About Destroying Dudes

"Kill 'em with kindness" and whatnot, but Detroit rapper/singer Dej Loaf's style is more "kindness with kill 'em." With "Try Me," the young upstart has acquired viral fortitude and a prominent roster of co-signers, including Drake (who quoted the track on his Instagram) and Wiz Khalifa (who remixed it earlier this… » 9/25/14 12:40pm 9/25/14 12:40pm

Drake and Rihanna Hung Out Twice, 'Proof' that They Are Humping Again

It is written: If two people who formerly humped hang out twice in one week, they are 100% definitely humping once again. (I mean, that actually usually is true, but also this is silly.) Such is the case with Rihanna and Drake, who sat near each other at a club the other night and then at Drake's concert the following… » 8/20/14 8:00pm 8/20/14 8:00pm

Drake Singing 'Let It Go' Is the Perfect Palate Cleanser

Drake, my pretend boo on the days I take a break from my Idris Elba fantasies, hosted the ESPY Awards last night with a flair that only a Canadian child star turned rapper can bring. While I find the show itself to be pretty ridiculous, (athletes don't need an awards show, their award was winning games) Drake did a… » 7/17/14 7:15pm 7/17/14 7:15pm

Drake's Penis Is 'Weird, Thin, and Pointy,' Says Future Shakespeare

Today is the day that I read several conflicting accounts about the shape of Drake's celebrity penis and what he likes people to do or not do with his butthole while he touches said controversially shaped penis. Today is also the day that I realized that every other non-today day of my life has been wasted. » 7/14/14 8:00pm 7/14/14 8:00pm

Kim Kardashian to Pregnant Women: "Never Leave the House"

There is something truly beautiful about the way that women can connect with and understand one another through the shared experience of pregnancy (I'm not in this kool klub). Somehow, magically, Kim Kardashian has found a way to poop on that concept, recommending that women just stay at home and hide when pregnant. » 7/12/14 11:21am 7/12/14 11:21am