Kate Middleton's Uterus Is Making Camilla Parker Bowles an Alcoholic

Some ludicrous story in the Globe says that the bright, sparkling English promise that is Kate Middleton's possibly-occupied womb has sent Camilla Parker Bowles straight to the bottle; she was reportedly sent to dry up in a 7-day detox retreat in Bangalore, India. Camilla and Prince Charles (the latter who has…

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Dolly Parton Wishes You a Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween from Dolly Parton, a national treasure with a heart of gold under a rack of steel, tough as nails and sweeter than anything, pretty much the best person alive, wish she was my mom and/or best friend, she has an AMUSEMENT PARK with a ROLLER COASTER shaped like HER BOOBS*, the ultimate and original…

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Adele's Newborn Baby Welcomed to World by Hateful Twitter Trolls

Holy shit. Remember that time you had faith in people? Well, it was unmerited and undeserved, because—like a modern day version of the Rumplestiltskin tale—just hours after Adele popped out her kid, Twitter trolls went after her and the baby for literally no reason. Not that there would ever be a good reason, but you…

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Christina Aguilera Tells Label 'I'm a Fat Girl, Deal With It'

Christina Aguilera covers Billboard Magazine this month to promote her newest album, Lotus, featuring the single "Your Body." In the interview, she recalls the pressure that music studios put on her image in the early-aughts, something she's not standing for in these P.B. (Post-Burlesque) days:

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Shocker: Topless Photos of Kate Middleton Reveal She Has Nipples

Now all we need is a few close-ups of Prince William's bald spot and we can call it a day, because French gossip rag Closer has run a bunch of topless shots of Kate Middleton taken on the terrace of a private guest house during a vacation to Provence with Willz last week. (Click through for the NSFW shots, featuring…

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Sheryl Crow Thinks She Got a Brain Tumor From Her Cell Phone, and…

I always knew that Stephen King books were based in reality: Sheryl Crow struck fear into the hearts of all by suggesting that her benign brain tumor was caused by cell phone use, although "there are no doctors that will confirm that," she told Katie Couric. "I do have the theory that it's possible that it's related to…

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Dolly Parton Gets Lock, Stock and Cracker Barrel

Cracker Barrel Music presents 'An Evening With... Dolly' Gold Record Celebration for her first Gold recording in 11 years and the first Certified Gold Recording in the Cracker Barrel Music Line. Presentation held at Dolly Records/CTK Management on August 10, 2012 in Nashville, Tennessee. (Photo by Rick Diamond/Getty…

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Cool Giovanni Ribisi And Cool Agyness Deyn Elope Coolly

Giovanni Ribisi, Giovanni Ribisi's moustache and model Agyness Deyn have apparently been dating on the sly for months and quietly married in Los Angeles this weekend. As recently as March, Deyn told press "I'm all alone. There has been no man in my life for several months now and although it would be nice to have a…

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In Case You Missed It, Amber Riley Killed 'I Will Always Love You' on…

Glee has become a disappointingly confusing clusterfuck of random ideas fit only for Hate Watching (seriously, I've been unhappy with almost every plotline since The Acafellas broke up) but last night, Mercedes — played by Amber Riley — sang the song Dolly Parton wrote in 1973 and Whitney Houston made megafamous in…

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