Dolly Parton Was in a Car Accident, But Calm Down, SHE'S OKAY

» 10/21/13 8:40pm 10/21/13 8:40pm

Dolly Parton crashed her car a little bit, but Dolly Parton is okay. I repeat. DOLLY PARTON IS NOT IN DANGER. Ladies and gentlemen, as living, breathing, flesh-and-blooded animals, I realize that you get very upset when Dolly Parton faces any sort of peril—or even mild inconvenience—so I am deeply relieved to tell… » 10/21/13 8:40pm 10/21/13 8:40pm

Sign My Petition To Get Burt Reynolds and Dolly Parton in '50 Shades'!

UPDATE! Midnight, 9/5: 59 SIGNATURES!!! ALMOST THERE! HOW POETIC IS THIS YOU GUISE? It is literally 9/5 and we are SO CLOSE away from achieving our goal! In recognition of your hard work, here is Dolly singing '9 to 5' (there is a possibility we could incorporate this into the '50 Shades of Grey Movie,' fyi.) BUT YOU… » 9/04/13 10:00pm 9/04/13 10:00pm

Drunk History's Dolly Parton Segment Is as Epic as You'd Imagine

On the list of people universally adored, Dolly Parton likely ranks in the top 10. Everyone loves Dolly and there's no wondering as to why — she's talented, down-to-earth, sweet as sugar and progressive. All of these ingredients add up to an extremely well-liked person and they're also why Parton makes such a perfect… » 8/21/13 12:40pm 8/21/13 12:40pm

Taylor Swift Photo Op Cancelled After ‘Creepy’ 39-Year-Old Troll Wins

Boston's Kiss FM has cancelled a contest to get a picture backstage with Taylor Swift because the winner was a "creepy" 39-year-old man named Charles who intended to troll Swift after securing his victory with the help of 4chan, Reddit and spambot votes. Earlier this month, someone posted on behalf of ol' Chuck: » 7/24/13 9:00am 7/24/13 9:00am

Kate Middleton's Uterus Is Making Camilla Parker Bowles an Alcoholic

Some ludicrous story in the Globe says that the bright, sparkling English promise that is Kate Middleton's possibly-occupied womb has sent Camilla Parker Bowles straight to the bottle; she was reportedly sent to dry up in a 7-day detox retreat in Bangalore, India. Camilla and Prince Charles (the latter who has… » 11/30/12 9:00am 11/30/12 9:00am

Adele's Newborn Baby Welcomed to World by Hateful Twitter Trolls

Holy shit. Remember that time you had faith in people? Well, it was unmerited and undeserved, because—like a modern day version of the Rumplestiltskin tale—just hours after Adele popped out her kid, Twitter trolls went after her and the baby for literally no reason. Not that there would ever be a good reason, but you… » 10/22/12 9:00am 10/22/12 9:00am

Shocker: Topless Photos of Kate Middleton Reveal She Has Nipples

Now all we need is a few close-ups of Prince William's bald spot and we can call it a day, because French gossip rag Closer has run a bunch of topless shots of Kate Middleton taken on the terrace of a private guest house during a vacation to Provence with Willz last week. (Click through for the NSFW shots, featuring… » 9/14/12 9:00am 9/14/12 9:00am

Sheryl Crow Thinks She Got a Brain Tumor From Her Cell Phone, and…

I always knew that Stephen King books were based in reality: Sheryl Crow struck fear into the hearts of all by suggesting that her benign brain tumor was caused by cell phone use, although "there are no doctors that will confirm that," she told Katie Couric. "I do have the theory that it's possible that it's related to… » 9/11/12 9:00am 9/11/12 9:00am

Cool Giovanni Ribisi And Cool Agyness Deyn Elope Coolly

Giovanni Ribisi, Giovanni Ribisi's moustache and model Agyness Deyn have apparently been dating on the sly for months and quietly married in Los Angeles this weekend. As recently as March, Deyn told press "I'm all alone. There has been no man in my life for several months now and although it would be nice to have a… » 6/22/12 9:00am 6/22/12 9:00am