<

Fuck, Are You About to Give Me a Bath or Something; Please Don't 

This white bitch lives in Fort Greene, you’re probably thinking, what does she have to complain about? But I can’t help it that I’m white. My parents worked hard to get where they are and they’ve never given me any money—food, shelter and the sum total of everything else I have needed to be successful doesn’t count;… »8/26/15 10:50am8/26/15 10:50am

Woman Loses Her Mind, Is Removed From Flight After Refusing to Put Dog in Carrier

A woman was recently dragged off an airplane after she failed to put her growling, snapping dog in its carrier before takeoff. A fellow passenger filmed the incident (as one does) and if nothing else, we should recognize this lady’s convincing performance as a deeply disturbed human who loves her tiny helldog more… »8/18/15 6:40pm8/18/15 6:40pm

Why Are Dogs So Insanely Happy to See Us When We Get Home?

Unlike a certain companion animal that will go unnamed, dogs lose their minds when reunited with their owners. But it’s not immediately obvious why our canine companions should grant us such an over-the-top greeting—especially considering the power imbalance that exists between the two species. We spoke to the experts… »7/31/15 2:28pm7/31/15 2:28pm

'Dog Flipping' Is the Hottest New Crime Trend

Last December, a Yorkshire terrier named Sushi ran away from her Houston home and popped up not in a “Missing Dog” sign, but rather for sale online. Sushi’s not alone—the pup’s part of a wave of pets that have been kidnapped and resold on Craigslist and other sites, either back to their owners or others. It’s like … »7/21/15 7:30pm7/21/15 7:30pm

Media Is Setting an Unhealthy Beauty Standard for Dogs

“Why don’t I look like that,” the dog asks, putting his paw to the television. On the screen, four chubby golden retriever puppies bound down the stairs to an overflowing bowl of dog food. A single dog tear rolls from the dog’s dog eye as he watches the puppies, their bodies displaying a chunky perfection that he will… »7/17/15 3:10pm7/17/15 3:10pm

Therapy Dog Gets License Revoked Because He Dresses Like a Biker

It’s not just teenage girls who have to deal with dress code shaming, dogs do too. A 5-year-old Boston terrier named Chopper the Biker Dog who goes around visiting hospitals and senior centers on his mini motorcycle had his therapy dog license revoked because of his outfit. Chopper’s usual attire consists of a leather… »6/05/15 10:10am6/05/15 10:10am

That Time Mike Huckabee's Loser Son Allegedly Tortured a Dog to Death

Welcome to Loser Sons of Politics, a new column where the politically minded among the Jezebel staff recall with fondness the antics of the loser sons of politicians. Today (because it’s a very big and special day for the former Arkansas Governor), we’re recalling that time Mike Huckabee’s loser son David killed a dog… »5/05/15 3:00pm5/05/15 3:00pm

Flight Attendant Gets Stitches After Bite From Barbra Streisand's Dog

Earlier this week a flight attendant who works on Ron Perelman’s private jet was bitten by Barbra Streisand’s 12-year-old fluffball, Samantha, reports Page Six. After petting Sammie “without showing her hand first,” the flight attendant was given a bite that required her to get stitches, and Streisand is… »5/01/15 2:20pm5/01/15 2:20pm

The Next Frontier in the Weed Business Is Sick, Old Dogs

Given how much Americans love their pets and how often they express that love by spending large amounts of money (not criticizing; I own a quadruple-decker cat tower), it was only a matter of time before somebody started selling cannabis treats for sad sick old dogs. Welcome to the latest frontier in marijuana… »4/13/15 7:45pm4/13/15 7:45pm