No Shit: Disneyland Measles Outbreak Linked to Anti-Vaxxers

Disneyland has spent the last few months battling a measles outbreak, which scientists have now linked to—wait for it—low vaccination rates. Huh. It's almost as if diseases that we essentially eradicated will return if children aren't goddamn vaccinated. » 3/16/15 2:50pm 3/16/15 2:50pm

Crazy Parents Still Refusing to Vaccinate Their Children 

The Disneyland measles outbreak has now spread to 14 states, with 98 confirmed cases. Health officials in Arizona have warned that 1,000 people could have been exposed and urged them to stay away from Super Bowl events. The White House suggested that everyone listen to scientists and vaccinate their children. And now,… » 1/31/15 11:25am 1/31/15 11:25am

Get Excited to Relive the Past, With America's Measles Outbreak! 

Oregon Trail fans, rejoice! Get pumped, reenactors! The past is back and it's badder than ever, in the form of a real-deal measles outbreak. The American West is your own, all-too-real colonial Williamsburg! » 1/29/15 7:10pm 1/29/15 7:10pm

Disneyland Measles Outbreak Spreads Across Country 

Disneyland: it used to be the happiest place on earth and now it's just a fetid wasteland of contagious disease. The number of measles cases from the Disneyland outbreak almost doubled this week. At least 85 cases are now confirmed in seven states, the latest in Nebraska. Health officials in Alaska are currently… » 1/25/15 3:00pm 1/25/15 3:00pm

FDA to Ruin Your Cheesecake Factory Run With Calorie Counts

Thanks to a new Food and Drug Administration ruling, not even movie theaters and pizza shops will be safe havens for calorie overloads anymore. Every shop, picture house and chain restaurant must list their menu's calorie count. Merry Christmas and Happy Thanksgiving! » 11/25/14 11:10am 11/25/14 11:10am

Writer Attempts and Fails Insane 24-Hour Disney Theme Park Challenge

One writer chronicled his slow descent into hell, aka a 24-hour marathon Disney theme park visit. The results are nothing short of absolutely spectacular. » 5/28/14 10:30pm 5/28/14 10:30pm

Disneyland Is More Hellishly Overcrowded Than Ever

Disneyland is currently so massively packed that, according to experts, either ticket prices go through the stratosphere, or the company adds another park. Or the happiest place on Earth becomes progressively more 28 Days Later-like. Doesn't that sound like FUN?!?! » 5/21/14 7:15pm 5/21/14 7:15pm

Disney Park Employee Tells Mom to Cover Up Her Big Breasts

Melissa Behnken was recently visiting Disneyland with her husband and three children when she was approached by a park employee who allegedly insisted that she either pull her shirt up or put on a sweater because she was showing too much skin. » 4/18/14 8:15pm 4/18/14 8:15pm

Footage of 1955 Disneyland Might Make You Want to Visit Disneyland?

The dentist chair*, the DMV, Whole Foods at 2pm on Fourth of July. That's a list of places I'd rather be than at that funhouse hell hole known as Disneyland. » 7/08/13 2:20pm 7/08/13 2:20pm

Disney World and Toontown Are Not Immune to Perils of the Real World

Disney may seem like an idyllic place where cartoons aren't imaginary and dreams do come true, but behind the brightly colored buildings lies a dark underworld. On Tuesday, Toontown was rocked by a trashcan explosion, later found to be caused by a dry-ice "bomb," aka bottle of soda with dry ice in it. Visitors of… » 5/31/13 11:15am 5/31/13 11:15am

Who Wants to Live in a Replica of Disney's Haunted Mansion? Now's Your…

You could own a replica of the Haunted Mansion just in time to throw the most killer Halloween party ever. Theme Park Connection, a company that specializes in selling rare Disney collectibles, has put the 10,000-square-foot home—modeled after the Disneyland attraction—up for sale on eBay for $873,000. » 10/04/12 12:20pm 10/04/12 12:20pm

Mickey Mouse Is Totally Cool With Gay Marriage (in Japan, Anyhow)

Progressive politics isn't the first thing that comes to mind when you think about Disneyland, which is why everyone was surprised this week when Disneyland in Tokyo said it will allow same sex couples to get married in the park—though their policy appears to be something of a work in progress. » 5/17/12 10:00am 5/17/12 10:00am

The French Greet Euro Disney’s 20th Anniversary with Typical Ennui

Characters from Euro Disneyland perform at Disneyland's theme park in Marne-la-Vallee, east of Paris, Saturday March 31, 2012. This will mark the 20th year since Disneyland opened in Paris in 1992.(AP Photo/Michel Spingler) » 3/31/12 4:55pm 3/31/12 4:55pm

Disney Prematurely Indefinitely Delays Controversial Fat Shameland

A Walt Disney World exhibit on childhood obesity has been closed prematurely after fat acceptance groups pointed out that way the exhibit depicts fat people is totally hateful and fucked up. Disney claims it was just trying to encourage kids to be healthier. Those against the childhood obesity exhibit say that it… » 3/01/12 4:20pm 3/01/12 4:20pm

Group Claims Disneyland Is Happiest & Most Lead-Filled Place On Earth

Sorry to tarnish your treasured family memories, but it seems that the goofy shot of you grabbing the Sword in the Stone statue at Disneyland is actually a picture of you exposing yourself to high levels of lead. An environmental group has filed a lawsuit against Disney for allegedly failing to remove or post adequate… » 10/18/11 11:53pm 10/18/11 11:53pm

Adorable Girl Freaks Out When Her Disney Dream Comes True

Have you ever wanted to watch a child's mind explode because she's experiencing so much joy that she simply can't handle it? Well, you're in luck! Meet Lily, whose sixth birthday is coming up. Her mother decides to give her an early present in the form of a backpack loaded with goodies, which she opens with adorably… » 10/06/11 9:30pm 10/06/11 9:30pm

Another Kid Gets A TSA Patdown

In case you were concerned, the TSA remains vigilant in its efforts to protect passengers from bomb-toting tots. Here, an eight-year-old boy gets a patdown — on his way to Disneyland, no less. Luckily, he was found to have no weapons, and the Magic Kingdom could breathe easily for another day. » 4/14/11 11:00am 4/14/11 11:00am

Disneyland Employee Files Complaint Over No-Hijab Rule

A Muslim woman announced today that she'll be filing a discrimination complaint against Disneyland because her bosses there sent her home for wearing her hijab. » 8/18/10 5:12pm 8/18/10 5:12pm

To Catch A Predator: How To React To Guys Who Grope

Upon being groped during a lights-out section of a ride at Disneyland, the quick-thinking Christina Esquivel grabbed her cellphone and took a picture of her attacker. But that's only one way of stopping those creeps. » 2/03/10 1:40pm 2/03/10 1:40pm