Ugh to This LOFT Ad About Frantically Binge-Exercising in Saran Wrap 

Yeah, yeah, we all had a lot of cookies this past month and now maybe your clothes don't fit right. Or maybe they do. Or maybe you don't give a fuck? Whatever the case, January is always a big month for "Feel bad about yourself you ugly cow"-style advertising. Clothing retailer LOFT just added another one on the pile,… » 1/09/15 4:50pm 1/09/15 4:50pm

This Week in Tabloids: Angelina and Brad's 'Bizarre' Parenting Methods

Welcome back to Midweek Madness. Every Wednesday, Callie Beusman heads to the newsstand to purchase the new issues of In Touch, Life & Style, Ok!, Us and Star, so that together we may dig into moist, rich celebrity tabloid dirt. This week: Tom Cruise is wearing his midlife crisis on his face; Kim Kardashian spent $23K… » 4/09/14 3:20pm 4/09/14 3:20pm

Folks Are Awfully Smug About Declaring 'Fat & Fit' a Myth

A massive new meta-analysis of medical studies involving tens of thousands of subjects has shown that even "healthy" obesity is often a precursor to health problems — but then again, so is unhealthy non-obesity. So why are news outlets once again making it all about tongue-clicking fat people? » 12/03/13 12:50pm 12/03/13 12:50pm

Blake Lively Says She Has A Great Body Because Of Chocolate

In news that you will make you think Willy Wonka is behind all those vast global media conspiracies we keep telling you are just 'silly,' Gossip Girl thespian and perfect dress wearer Blake Lively says NOPE, when it comes to her famous figure, she doesn't exercise or train or diet or count calories or get illegal… » 11/03/13 3:23pm 11/03/13 3:23pm

Lose Weight with Beef Tea and Stewed Fruit on the President Taft Diet

William Howard Taft was, notoriously, our fattest president, weighing in somewhere between 314 and 340 pounds during his term. One time he got stuck in a bathtub or something (maybe). This is literally the only thing anyone remembers about President Taft, even though—little known factoid—he was actually doing all… » 10/15/13 3:20pm 10/15/13 3:20pm

We're Already Talking About Hillary Clinton's 'Presidential Diet'

If Hillary Clinton were to run for President in 2016, she'd have a lot of ducks to get in a row — fundraising, amassing an army of volunteers, getting key endorsements, building a killer staff to fuel her unstoppably Hillary Machine. Dozens of extra-shiny flag lapel pins, I'd imagine. Here's something that would… » 8/08/13 10:50am 8/08/13 10:50am

CVS Punishes Fat Employees, As If That Will Magically Make Them Skinny

Why can nothing be easy in this country? First you have to submit to ten personality tests to get a job folding jeans at Old Navy, then your vacation days are whittled down to six per millennium, and now you have to relinquish full blood work, a pint of urine, and your soul to get reasonably priced healthcare (lest… » 3/21/13 11:40am 3/21/13 11:40am

Terrifying New Bulimia Machine Will Suck Food From Your Stomach

If you'd asked me a week ago what the future of dieting would look like, I would've told you I think it could go one of two ways. Either we become a society that grows to accept people of different sizes or we're gonna start literally torturing fat people into becoming skinny. You know, for their own good. » 1/07/13 10:45am 1/07/13 10:45am

You Are When You Eat: The 8-Hour Diet Insanely Encourages Eating Only…

David Zinczenko the chief yahoo Editor in Chief at Men's Health has written new weight loss manifesto The 8-Hour Diet: Watch the Pounds Disappear Without Watching What You Eat!, argue that eating around the clock is responsible for the country's high rates of diabetes and obesity. Their solution? Eat between 9am-5pm.… » 1/02/13 11:00pm 1/02/13 11:00pm

Looking at a Picture of a Skinny Model While Dieting Might Actually…

If you think about it, things are pretty terrific, but they are also pretty fucking terrible, too. Your life is going perfectly well, but looked at from another angle, you are a complete and utter disappointment to everyone. You're really pretty, except when you are not. And the world is a welcoming, open place, when… » 1/02/13 3:10pm 1/02/13 3:10pm

UK Government Minister Tells Magazines to Drop the Post-Christmas…

Equalities minister Jo Swinson is sick and tired of magazine features on how to lose 10 pounds in 48 hours by only eating cayenne pepper while turning counter-clockwise three times under a full moon — the sort of stories that appear without fail after the holiday stress-eating trend pieces have run their course. » 12/27/12 12:15pm 12/27/12 12:15pm

Weight Watchers Probably Won't Help You Lose Tons of Weight, So Maybe…

Weight Watchers is an institution. For almost five decades, it's been seen as the sane alternative to the dump truck of more intense dieting programs that surround us. Unlike incredibly restrictive programs such as Jenny Craig and Nutrisystem, which include their own chemical-death meals in Lilliputian portions, or… » 12/04/12 1:15pm 12/04/12 1:15pm

New Crash Diet Book Wants You to Starve, Freeze, Stop Eating Vegetables

Have you heard about Six Weeks to OMG: Get Skinnier Than All Your Friends, the fad diet du jour that claims "broccoli carbs can be worse than soda carbs" and "small, frequent meals pack on the pounds"? We haven't covered the book (because the title alone represents everything we oppose), but if you commute to work,… » 8/14/12 2:30pm 8/14/12 2:30pm

Want to Eat Less? Try Putting On Diet Goggles

Beer goggles are famous for making everything look better, and a new pair of diet goggles are designed to do something very similar. Created by researchers in Japan, the goggles have a little computer inside that magnifies the size of whatever the wearer is holding while keeping their hand the same size. This makes… » 6/06/12 11:55pm 6/06/12 11:55pm