The Tragic Tale of the Blind Date Dick Pic
On Sunday at noon, I was dressed up, with a flower in my hair, standing in front of a Rousseau painting at the Museum of Modern Art, looking for a well-dressed stranger. I'd been set up on a blind date.
Man Unsatisfied With His 10 Inch Penis So He Bought More Penis [NSFW]
Sometimes ten inches isn’t enough. For Billy-Tom O’Conner, he felt he needed more than his already sizable penis and bought some girth through penoplasty. It's all the rage in England.
Today's Best Line Break Brought to You by Bill Clinton's Dick
.... Cheney critique.
Ladies And Gentlemen, Here's Your First Dong Of The World Cup
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Well, here's a soccer dong. It's Jordan Ayew's, and flopped around a bit after he got his shorts pulled.
Jilted Porn Star Sends Dick Pics to Ex Lover's Congressman Boss
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"Revenge porn," long the nightmare scenario facing people who made the mistake of sexting with assholes, isn't a phenomenon where enraged men victimized hapless female victims. It works the other way, too.
Tom Ford Has Designed an Ornamental Crucifix-Dick
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Because doing edgy fashion-things involving genitals will never go out of style, Tom Ford has designed some cross-shaped necklaces that, upon closer inspection, reveal themselves to be phalluses. Penises as religious icons: just what this world is lacking.
Violence Against Women Will End When You Sluts Get Married, Says WaPo
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The Washington Post has just published an op-ed entitled "One way to end violence against women? Stop taking lovers and get married" (the paper later changed the headline). To that, I say: Washington Post: Stop Posting Bullshit And Set Yourself On Fire.
Like Naked Male Celebs? There's a Website Full of Penis Just for You.
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There is a website cataloging male nudity on television! And it’s called Mr. Man! Vindication!
Miley Cyrus Simulated Fellatio With A Giant Inflatable Penis in London
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Miley Cyrus is in London this week having one hell of a good time.
Floyd Mayweather Posts Ex's Sonogram, Accuses Her of 'Killing Babies'
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Earlier this year, boxer Floyd Mayweather got dumped by his fiancee Shantel Jackson after he allegedly cheated on her. But Mayweather has since apparently gone batshit insane, insisting that it was he who dumped her, and that he did it because she had "a abortion." To support this accusation, he posted what he claims…
Sorority 'Dick Sucking Queen' Writes Truly Unhinged Graduation Letter
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Sorority life teaches young ladies many important lessons throughout their college tenures: sisterhood, service, and, if this graduation from one nutty sorority girl is to be believed, dick sucking.
In Praise of Television Peen
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I watch a lot of television. From ABC to HBO, AMC to FX, Netflix and Starz and more but most of my shows are missing something — penis. Oh, there are plenty of breasts, female backsides in dim lighting or girls emulating blow jobs or back shots, but as a heterosexual women I am tired of thinking ‘Where’s the peen?’ or…
Male Athletes Are Obsessed With Each Other's Dongs
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If you ever wanted to pull a Porky's and spy into a men's locker room but didn't because it's both illegal and immoral (good for you!), Dr Christopher Morriss-Roberts, a podiatrist who specializes in sports sociology at the University of Brighton, might be able to shed some light on what goes on in there. Turns out,…
Deal of the Day: Buy Three Pairs of Underwear, Get Free Dick Insurance
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Today, a Canadian underwear company announced that certain customers will now qualify for $50,000 worth of free penis insurance.
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Thurston Moore Confirms He Is a Dick
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Aging indie rock cool guy Thurston Moore spoke publicly for the first about the end of his marriage to ageless indie rock cool lady Kim Gordon to a UK magazine recently. And, predictably, he sounds like a dickhole.
Loving Husband Draws 365 Dicks for His Adored Wife
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Anyone who has been to a Jesus-based church wedding knows that the Bible says love is patient, love is kind, love lasts forever. Etc etc etc. But here's another love is that you won't hear uttered from behind a pulpit: Love is 365 artfully rendered dicks on a whiteboard.
Gah, There's a Hidden Penis in An American Tail: Fievel Goes West
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There are no cats in America and the streets are drawn with diiiiiiiiiiicks!
Moron Politician Is Super Sorry He Called Congresswoman 'Some Bimbo'
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A bitter (and, quite frankly, kind of crazy-sounding) California ex-Congressman named Joe Baca gave a super unhinged interview today after the woman who won a congressional election against him announced she wouldn't run for reelection. He was mad. He was say-super-sexist-shit mad.
Break Your Man's Penis With Cosmo's Ridiculous Olympic Sex Tips
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In honor of the upcoming Winter Games, this month's issue of Cosmopolitan tailored its monthly offering of sex tips around an Olympics theme. And, like the Olympics, only the world's most elite athletes should try them. Seriously. They're cock-snappingly harrowing.