Mitch McConnell–a small reptilian operating levers within the brain of the reanimated corpse of an Antebellum Kentucky gentleman–poked his head out in the Senate this evening to justify the sinister secret process by which Republicans are drafting a health care bill. Over the course of over a month, he and 12 other…
What do you see when you die?
Chris Cornell, frontman of Soundgarden and Audioslave, was found dead on Tuesday night in Detroit. The AP reports that the autopsy on Cornell’s body was completed Thursday afternoon, and confirms that Cornell died by suicide after hanging himself. The full toxicology report has not yet been completed.
Roger Ailes, the founder and former chief executive of Fox News, is dead, his wife told the Drudge Report. His goblin spirit will live on, however, in Fox News’ disgustingly predatory workplace culture, and the racism, xenophobia, hatred, fear and allergy to facts the network has inspired in millions upon millions of…
Like a very large succulent plant, Scott Baio requires attention every once in a while—whether he’s telling liberal snowflakes to “grow the blank up” and quit with “all of your antics of Russia,” or coldly speculating that his former Happy Days costar Erin Moran died of a drug addiction and remembering her as an…
True to his personal brand—which I can only describe as “vapid, faux-lumberjack death-bringer”—Donald Trump Jr. was reportedly slaughtering prairie dogs in Montana on Earth Day.
Global warming! Fingers typing! Fast traffic! Wind and rain! Eyeballs! We’re all going to die, VERY soon—unless you attend the Electric Daisy Carnival in Las Vegas. There, you will be spared from fear, loss, and the inevitable wrath of Kim Jong Un, protected by an incredible technicolor force field of rave sweat and…
The Daily Mail reported on Friday that a man died tragically several months ago when a portion of his nearly six-ton porn collection fell on top of him, crushing or possibly suffocating him. The weight of the magazines upon the man’s chest may also have triggered a heart attack.
If you’ve had bed bugs, you know that the damage they inflict is largely psychological. Yes, they feed on human blood, and if you are allergic the bite marks they leave can blow up to painful welts, but long after you’ve healed, long after they’ve been exterminated from your living space, their presence lingers. Any…
Spoilers, frands.
Television legend Mary Tyler Moore died Wednesday afternoon at the age of 80, just hours after it was reported that she was in grave condition at a Connecticut hospital. TMZ reports the late actress had been suffering from “a number of health problems,” and had been on a respirator “for more than a week.” She died…
In December, we learned that xoJane’s legendary founder, Jane Pratt, was leaving the company and that the famously controversial personal essay hub would fold into InStyle, signaling the end times for the overly confessional hate-read. (Hearst’s The Mix, more or less cut from the same cloth as xoJane, quietly died…
There are moments in our lives that make us think about the end. I have two on my mind. First, sometime in my pre-teens, while racing my bicycle down the block with friends, pedaling way too fast, I slammed the bike straight into a car at an intersection, fell off, and hit the ground hard. Not much was bruised aside…
On Tuesday, a Taiwanese politician had 50 strippers dancing on top of Jeeps with special poles attached to the roof for his funeral procession. Is that enough strippers for a funeral though?
Justin Harris was arrested in 2014 after his son, Cooper, died in the backseat of his car. Evidence supported the prosecutor’s accusation that Harris knew his son was in the car, and he deliberately left him locked inside to die to escape his family life.
A UK based girl identified as JS died from a rare form of cancer last month. Her battle to have her body cryogenically preserved was not reported until after her death, but the decision was hotly contested by her parents in court.
On Monday, Melanie Liverpool was arrested for shoving a woman onto the subway tracks at the Times Square subway station. On Tuesday, Liverpool was ordered held without bail in court in the death of that woman, 49 year old Connie Watton, where she insisted that she was not guilty.
On Monday, at around 1:20 pm, a woman waiting on an subway platform in Times Square was pushed in front of southbound 1 train and killed.
On Thursday night, Patton Oswalt headlined his first hourlong stand-up special since his wife, Michelle McNamara, died in April.
