After serious journalistic reports came in that Sofia Vergara was wearing a "sparkly ring," we sat up all night, vigilant, waiting to see if she had indeed been proposed to on her Mexican vacation with boyfriend Nick Loeb. (Remember that scene in Secretary when she's sitting at the desk in her wedding gown for days…

In today's Tweet Beat, David Lynch is a regular Snow White, Chloe Moretz has no filter, Lisa Rinna's living in Bonnie Raitt's sloppy seconds and Kyle Richards wants your thoughts on placenta-eating.

Everybody, today is David Lynch's 66th birthday. You know what that means, don't you? It means that a whole bunch of tiny people come out of your faucet, a guy dressed as a firefighter knocks on your door to deliver a death threat, and Laura Dern smokes crack on your couch. Or you could just watch this insane video, …

Four days after they were reported missing, country star Mindy McCready and her 5-year-old son Zander were found hiding in a closet in an Arkansas home and the boy has since been taken into custody.

So. You know that Jennifer Aniston is dating Justin Theroux. Did you know that Justin Theroux just ended is 14 year relationship with his girlfriend, Heidi Bivens? As in: She moved out over the weekend. Hence a headline insinuating that Jen is a "homewrecker." Bivens is "devastated," and the column at the link is sure to…

Today in Tweet Beat, Toni Braxton hasn't had any plastic surgery, except for those times when she did. Plus, Nick Cannon wants to talk about homophobia.

• Judging from this ad, Avril Lavigne's perfume, Forbidden Rose, smells like eyeliner, cast iron, a decaying forest in winter, and an incongruous hair-bow like the ones your mother used to make you wear for family pictures. [TLF]

Today in Tweet Beat, Ice-T is not in a good mood today, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany (and a gun?) are hanging out together, and with Jon Gosselin, it's the same shit, different girlfriend.

Today in Tweet Beat, Heidi is trying out that "cougar" thing, Mary-Kate Olsen likes it when you tell her that she's pretty, and Adrianne Curry might be pregnant but hopes that she's not.

Today in Tweet Beat, Courtney Love is saying a lot of stuff, but very little of it makes sense. Also, David Lynch shares his plans for the weekend.