This morning, for a brief, shining moment, CNN fat shamed the pope. Not even His Holiness is immune from an overly critical media that promotes an unrealistic papal body image. What next? Airbrushing cleavage on The Virgin Mary?
Cool pope Pope Francis is so cool (HOW COOL IS HE?) that he recently said he'd be willing to baptize aliens from outer space if they ever touch down on Earth looking to be saved.
Oh, Pope Francis. We're all trying so hard to be into you—despite the fact that you are the figurehead of a historically oppressive international corporation that shelters pedophiles, stigmatizes safe sex, and encourages the mass marginalization of women and gay people—so why don't you just go all the way and really…
