I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy. Instead, Chris Brown, Frank Ocean and six posse members threw down in the parking lot of a recording studio in West Hollywood last night.

For Lady Gaga's next trick, she will buy Neverland Ranch and cover it with black vinyl and spikes. Gaga, who has previously purchased 55 pieces of costly Jacko memorabilia, befriended LaToya Jackson and wants to help a "desperate" Paris, Prince and Blanket keep their 3,000-acre childhood home, which was sold to an…

Last night at the 70th annual Golden Globe Awards, the gowns were mostly good: Sparkly, vibrant, glittery bombshell dresses perfect for Hollywood royalty. Unfortunately, there were a couple of duds: Hideous or ill-fitting concoctions that fell flat. Let's take a look, shall we?

Some mole over in Justin Bieber's camp say that the B33bz is pissing off his record label and his assorted grown-up servants by being a lazy, ungrateful little stoner, just like—wait for it—an eighteen-year-old boy. Truly shocking. My monocle just fell plumb off my face.

Although it certainly raises the question of precisely what kind of roles Megan Fox will get that involve keeping her clothes on, Megan Fox will be keeping her clothes on in movies for awhile so that her baby son Noah doesn't get teased about it when he gets older:

Some ludicrous story in the Globe says that the bright, sparkling English promise that is Kate Middleton's possibly-occupied womb has sent Camilla Parker Bowles straight to the bottle; she was reportedly sent to dry up in a 7-day detox retreat in Bangalore, India. Camilla and Prince Charles (the latter who has…

Last week we discussed the Fine Art of the Cryface; this week, the heroes at Slacktory have put together a Claire Danes cryface supercut. Pretty sure Romeo + Juliet is the best one in here.

No one is pretty when they cry. OK, fine. Nicole Kidman is pretty when she cries, and Lauren Conrad didn't look terrible that time she cried streaks of mascara down her face. But the rest of us — gorgeous actresses included — have what is known as a "cryface." And it's almost invariably hilarious.

To the folks who have been screaming AHHHH YOU GAINED WEIGHT, WHAT ARE YOU, FATNESS EVERDEEN, Lady Gaga continues to level a resounding "Fuck yourself." Although the rumor out of Universal is that they had to order new, larger costumes for her, she told radio host Elvis Duran that she "doesn't feel bad about it. Not even…

After fifteen years of marriage (and a fair amount of that spent in couples therapy, apparently), two of the final standing members of the Un-Divorced Hollywood Old Guard, Antonio Banderas and Melanie Griffith, might be almost ready to call it quits. This spring, Banderas was seen getting all up on another woman at a…