If you have a cat, you may not have gotten laid in awhile. This commercial makes why completely clear.

There is discontent in the world of celebrity cats.

Where has Leona Lewis been, you ask? Everywhere and nowhere. Soon, she’ll be on Broadway, starring in the Cats comeback as Grizabella.

What can your pussy do?

The claws are out, fam!!!

Tom Hooper, the prolific director of humorless Oscar-bait including Les Miserables, will direct a movie version of the musical Cats. And I’ll just say if I have to sit through a dirtied-up Anne Hathaway scream-belting “Memory” I swear to God I will burn the theater down.

There’s a new fad on the Korean internet, and indeed, with this development, the Internet has perhaps reached its purest, truest use: watching stray cats eat.

You can’t ever say that Courtney Stodden doesn’t commit to whatever the hell her brand is supposed to be.

When I wrote about the kittens that did amazing stunts for Key and Peele’s Keanu movie, I didn’t think things could get any more disgustingly cute.

The impossibly cute kitten in the movie Keanu—the only reason many people will go see it—is actually not just one but seven goddamn kittens.

The Foreign Office of the United Kingdom has just acquired a rescue cat to patrol its aged halls, which apparently have a bit of a rodent problem. His name is Palmerston, after nineteenth-century foreign secretary Henry John Temple, 3rd Viscount Palmerston.

I’m a city cat.

Look in your pants to make sure this kitty didn’t get there first.

At around 5 a.m. during the first night my boyfriend spent at my apartment, we were shocked out of our sleep by a glass of water that had been dumped on us. The culprit: my cat, Kelloggs.

Good news, everyone—cats may be the only cuddly creatures on earth who don’t resent a restricted calorie meal.

Like most cats, Nano likes to hunt mice, hiss at dogs, and groom with her paws. Unlike most cats, Nano was born human. I stand with Nano.

During crowded train rides and shows that require just half of my attention, I play games on my phone. Some condescendingly refer to this as “casual gaming,” but some mobile titles can be just as exciting as a chain reaction of explosions in a big-budget console game like Just Cause 3. Neko Atsume, a Japanese game…

After being open for only a month, Catfé, which is currently Vancouver’s sole cat cafe, has briefly shut down due to all of their kitties finding loving homes. Now it’s just a regular cafe. :( But it’s still good news!

Happy New Year and good luck sleeping off that hangover. No matter how exhausted you are, do not let your cats make you breakfast. Cats are very bad at breakfast, and your omelet will be full of hair.

June Lockhart is an actress who appeared most famously in the television shows Lassie and Lost in Space. She also had a swimming cat named George.