Ben Carson's Campaign Has Basically Been One Long, Stupid Book Tour

In 2008, John McCain famously suspended his campaign to rush to the center of the financial problem and fix it like Superman flying to the surface of the sun. It seemed very silly at the time, because John McCain is a lot of things, but he is not a banking expert. The whole thing read as disingenuously opportunistic. »10/15/15 2:25pm10/15/15 2:25pm

Conservative Congress Candidate Poses With Wholesome Horse Erection

You may not yet be familiar with congressional candidate Gary Kiehne, a hell of a guy who's all about family values, fighting abortion and making up statistics about who's responsible for mass shootings (democrats), but you're about to be. Because the guy's got a giant horse dong in his campaign ad. Won't somebody »8/21/14 6:40pm8/21/14 6:40pm

Texas GOP Thinks Wendy Davis Is a Secret Agent from California

Wendy Davis is definitely, for sure, has-had-buttons-made-and-everything running for governor of Texas in the state’s 2014 Democratic primaries. Only a soothsayer would be able to tell you if she’s going to go on to win a general election and ensure that her state stops taking advice about women’s health policy from… »10/05/13 12:00pm10/05/13 12:00pm

Reminder: Worst Person in Weiner Scandal Is Still Anthony Weiner

Much to the chagrin of the local tabloid headline writer, at this point it's probably safe to say that Anthony Weiner will not be the next mayor of New York City. But something odd has happened as this golden age of dick punmaking in the name of journalism draw to a close— suddenly, we're talking more about the… »7/31/13 1:30pm7/31/13 1:30pm

Hypothetically, Hillary Clinton Is For Sure Running for President

Speaking at a women’s lecture series in Toronto, noted HGTV enthusiast Hillary Clinton dropped a bombshell. An atomic bombshell. No, fuck that — she terraformed the political landscape with a new and shocking statement. Clinton told the unsuspecting crowd that she’d like to see a woman become president of the… »6/23/13 12:30pm6/23/13 12:30pm

Hillary Clinton’s Presidential Poker Face Is Completely Inscrutable

Political Stratego champion Hillary Clinton is frustrating potential opponents in the 2016 presidential race by keeping her plans super secret. Is her "transition office" in a small corporate space on Connecticut Avenue in Washington D.C. the beehive of advance polling everyone thinks it is, or is it really just a… »3/31/13 12:00pm3/31/13 12:00pm

In Best Ever News, Planned Parenthood Killed It Re: Election Spending While Conservative Groups Epically Failed

Not into schadenfreude? Better stop reading now. Everyone else, get ready to rub your palms together and cackle: Planned Parenthood saw a near perfect return on its election spending, while conservative groups spent enough to make Donald Trump blush but have little to show for it. »11/09/12 3:45pm11/09/12 3:45pm

Watch Politicians Get Thrown Off Script When Disabled Adults Interview Them

Politicians are completely full of it, especially during interviews with journalists, and especially during an election year. So what happens when a news team consisting of only developmentally disabled adults tries to get past the votemongering spin and to the truth? A new movie shares their eye-opening, hilarious,… »10/19/12 6:40pm10/19/12 6:40pm

Paul Ryan Promises to Undo Contraception Mandate, Be Awesome at Space Travel

As part of his ongoing effort to make sure that as few women vote for Mitt Romney as possible, Paul Ryan told the fine people of Orlando who'd spoiled their Saturdays by listening to Paul Ryan brag about how many times he'd ridden Tower of Terror that he would remove the Affordable Care Act's "contraception mandate",… »9/23/12 12:00pm9/23/12 12:00pm

Ann Romney Will Inevitably Annoy Voters, Says Mitt Romney

Ann Romney's frequently been utilized as a surrogate for her husband in his Presidential campaign, and it's no wonder. She's sweet, friendly, warm, and, most importantly SHE LOOOVES YOUUU WOMEN! But this week, Mittens himself admitted that there is such thing as Too Much Ann Romney, and that if the campaign isn't… »9/19/12 1:30pm9/19/12 1:30pm

Ann Romney Insists That Mittens Does So Have Empathy

This morning on Meet the Press, Ann Romney made an admirable effort to convince the American voters — you know, the folks, the ordinary guys and gals out there pinching pennies, tightening belts and opting for off-brand paper towels — that her husband and Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney wasn't, in fact,… »9/09/12 9:30pm9/09/12 9:30pm

Chelsea Clinton Is Starting to Realize that She Must Fulfill Her Political Destiny

Chelsea Clinton may finally be ready to fulfill her political destiny and restore balance to the force, or, you know, at least run for office. In the September issue of Vogue, Clinton tantalizingly suggests that, if the planets aligned just and she had finally achieved the inner peace required to wade through the muck… »8/14/12 11:55pm8/14/12 11:55pm