Wait, "star"? Sorry, I spelled "resort to" wrong. It is written: Joan Rivers and Bristol Palin are going to Freaky Friday life-swap on ABC. (The role of "Boris" will be played by Herman Cain.)

Sincerest feelings-havers Lena Dunham and Taylor Swift have been Internet friends since Red dropped in October, but Dunham just admitted that the denizens of Bushwick who constitute her fanbase have a hard time believing that she scream-sings "You Belong With Me" in the shower like many a red-blooded human being.…

Bristol Palin appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night after being voted off Dancing with the Stars (shoulda gone with the Pachanga, OBV), and wasted no time in demanding an apology from noted Sarah Palin-skewerer Jimmy Kimmel. Funny how one's defensive ire against evil comedians evaporates as soon as one is offered …

Uuuuugh, get a grip, humans! Some crazy person who really really really doesn't enjoy Bristol Palin's attempts at the Samba (I assume he was hoping for the Pachanga) mailed a suspicious package filled with white mystery powder to CBS. The accompanying note explained that, "This is what will happen to you if Bristol…

What Not To Wear co-host Stacy London reveals in her upcoming book The Truth About Style that she came by the lessons she doles out to women in sartorial need the hard way. When her psoriasis began at the age of 4, she grew into a self-punishing adolescent who battled anorexia and compulsive overeating, with a weight…

Wow, okay. Wow. Once in a long while a story comes along that makes all this dirt-baggin' worth it. Specifically, for me, it happens when totally rando celebrities get mad at each other over mundane shit and I get to imagine them sitting in a room and yelling at each other. The best!!! Case in point: Rebecca Gayheart…

Levi Johnston, intermittent father of Bristol Palin's son Tripp, acquired a second baby this morning with the help of his new girlfriend Sunny Oglesby. And lo, they named it Breeze Beretta Johnston...after the Italian firearm. Specifically. On purpose. For her part, Bristol is PUMPED:

Things in Chez Lopez have apparently been strained since Jennifer Lopez's boyfriend Casper Smart accidentally tripped and fell into an "exotic massage parlor" and a gay porn shop the night before Lopez's 43rd birthday party. She's been "frustrated" and "short-tempered" with Smart since the incident, but is also "the kind of…

Even though she has her own program (on which she admits she's doing a terrible job disciplining her son, who utters words the FCC won't allow) Bristol Palin just can't get enough of the spotlight. The cast of Dancing With The Stars: All Stars has been announced, and your girl BriPal (Brilin?) is number one on the list …

Picture, if you will, Kanye West swimming in a vault of precious stones a la Scrooge McDuck; after girlfriend Kim Kardashian's divorce from Kris Humphries is finalized, 'Ye apparently plans to propose with a one-of-a-kind ring made from his late mom Donda's personal jewelry collection. He visited a private jeweler with …