New Texas Law Will Make it Slightly Easier to Pump Breast Milk at Work
Starting Tuesday, a new Texas law will require that public employees to be given breaks to pump breast milk at work, and that they can’t be fired or disciplined for taking the time to pump. The law benefits public employees like teachers, one of whom told the Texas Observer that she’s had to pump standing up in her…
Women Claim Maker of 'Breastmilk Keepsakes' Is Running a Huge Scam
A brand of extremely sentimental woman might choose to send her breastmilk to a company called MommyMilk Creations, which promises to transform your mommy juice into an adorable little pendant. But now, dozens of women who have paid and sent in their organic materials have been basically stranded—the company will not…
Tough Guy Body Builders Can't Get Enough of Those Lactating Tittays
Gains: You know you want them, but you don't know how to get them. You could, like many bodybuilders, spend hours in a squat cage in between chugging protein supplements. But if you're savvy and hip to the new "science" you may just want to toss all your whey powder for a couple of drops of what one Michigan mom is…
Breast Milk Butter Is the Sweetest, Creamiest Thing You've Ever Tasted
If you've always wanted to make butter from human breast milk, but don't know how, the internet is pleased to provide you with something you might have never even known you wanted: A tutorial detailing the magical process of transforming the fluid found in one's mammaries into a delectable breakfast treat. And there…
How to Build a Breast Pump That Doesn't Suck
On Sunday afternoon 10 harried but happy teams of hackers shared their inventions in Shark Tank-style five-minute presentations. The goal? To reinvent a clunky necessity of modern parenting: the breast pump.
Actual Complaints Against Employers Who Wouldn't Let Women Breastfeed
New mothers are given a slew of conflicting advice: they're told they must breastfeed their baby or they're a terrible parent, but also that they must go back to work and earn money as soon as they can or they're a lazy person (or, you know, in the case of most people who work because they have to and not because they…
Breastfeeding Benefits Have Been Exaggerated
Formula-feeding has been vilified in recent years, with new moms being told that if they don't breastfeed, they could be putting their child at risk for a slew of health, behavioral and developmental problems. But the findings of a new study suggest that's total bullshit. Breast might actually not be best.
Breast Milk Sold Online Is Often Contaminated
The black market for human breast milk has turned into something of a cottage industry in recent years, but a new study has found that the milk donated through swaps or sold on the Internet often contains high levels of potentially dangerous bacteria, including salmonella.
Breast-Milk-Flavored Lollipops Are Now Available for You to Suck On
Are you tired of the same old lollipops just sitting around in your mouth not tasting like a stranger's leaky breast? Well MERRY CHRISTMAS, SHERLOCK. After rigorous boob-milk taste-testing, the food scientists at one Austin-based candy company have managed to synthesize the flavor of human breast milk in the form of…
Breast Milk Jewelry: Cool New Way for Moms to Tell the World They've Given Up
Looking for a statement piece that screams, "I'm a mom and I've thrown in the towel, aesthetically," because your faded stretch pants and the food stains on your promotional T-shirt just aren't getting the message across? Well, you're in luck. For just $64 - $125 you can have your breast milk encapsulated into a…
Texas Woman Beats the Breast Milk Donation Record by a Dizzying 23 Gallons
A woman from northern Texas has just obliterated the Guinness world record for donated breast milk by untapping her bounteous milk ducts and pouring forth 86.8 gallons of sustenance. The cup of infants everywhere indeed runneth over.
Grown Man Is Sexually Aroused by Drinking Wife's Breast Milk
Meet Jeff, loving husband and father of two, who just happens to have a fetish for being breastfed. Luckily for him, Jeff's wife finds his fetish equally erotic. With a toddler and a newborn, she's been lactating for some time — and Jeff been sucking up the extra milk, straight from the source, as a part of the…
Poor Moms Invest More in Their Daughters, Rich Moms Invest More in Their Sons
You might not think that a mother's breastmilk would vary much based on the sex of her offspring, but you would be wrong. It turns out a new study has found that when mothers in Kenya were poor, they produced fattier breast milk for their girls than they did for their boys. The roots of this research can be traced…

