The Supreme Court on Monday refused to hear an appeal from the Easton school district in Pennsylvania on a case involving two middle schoolers who were disciplined for wearing "I heart boobies" bracelets. The move lets the decision of a lower court (which ruled the students have a free speech to wear the bracelets)… » 3/10/14 8:25pm 3/10/14 8:25pm

'Motorboating for Breast Cancer' Campaign Promotes Douchebag Awareness

Every year, millions of American men and boys are infected with douchebaggery — a soul-fatal condition in 90% of cases. While we know frustratingly little about the causes of douchebaggery, we see its devastating effects all around: public urination, the continuing popularity of Tosh.0, and, now, this latest Useless… » 10/16/13 11:20am 10/16/13 11:20am

Fun Breast Cancer® Awareness™ Products That Can Cause Breast Cancer®

Breast Cancer®, the America's Sweetheart of deadly, disfiguring diseases that it is, inspires a deluge of pink junk for sale every October. Some of that pink junk, in addition to being ugly, cloying, and infantilizing, contains chemicals that have been linked to boobs full of tumors. No Awareness™ like the Awareness™… » 10/15/13 1:40pm 10/15/13 1:40pm

The NFL's Breast Cancer Awareness Campaign Is Still a Sham

With all this shutdown hulabaloo, I almost forgot that October marks the annual pink barf tornado otherwise known as Breast Cancer Awareness month, a special time when corporations exploit our feelings of helplessness in the face of life's senseless brutality by directing people to Fight Cancer through the purchase of… » 10/04/13 1:50pm 10/04/13 1:50pm

Women Are Being Scared Into Traumatic Breast Cancer Treatments They…

Despite its shiny pink public facade, breast cancer is an ugly disease that often leaves its victims disfigured. But at least women who undergo preventative double mastectomies, perhaps the most aggressive response to the disease, can rest assured that they've for sure prevented a recurrence of The Big C, right? RIGHT? » 11/28/12 10:50am 11/28/12 10:50am

Is This Ad The Worst Breast Cancer Awareness Spot Ever?

You guys, we're almost all the way done with Breast Cancer Awareness month and the ridiculousness with which a deadly, tragic disease is touted as a fluffy pink girl power affliction best fought by Ben Roethlisberger in a pink jersey. But before this 2012 Breast Cancer Trivialization season becomes one for the record… » 10/27/12 3:30pm 10/27/12 3:30pm

Save the Women, Not the Boobies

Men notice boobs no matter where they are — under your shirt, in the written word, and, apparently, on my Facebook wall. All I had to do was post link with the headline-"No More ‘Save the Ta-Tas,' Please"-and before long, a couple of put-upon guys from my Midwestern roots swooped onto my Facebook page to tell me to get… » 10/23/12 3:40pm 10/23/12 3:40pm

Guns For the Cure® Probably Won't Cure Breast Cancer®, Either

Now, I'm not a science expert here, and I'm not a gun expert, either, but it seems slightly "off" to have a gun club sponsor an event with proceeds that benefit notorious pinkwasher Susan G. Komen For the Cure® during Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I mean, guns kill lots of people, much like breast cancer, so guns and… » 10/05/12 6:15pm 10/05/12 6:15pm

The Silliest Pink Crap Money Can Buy, None of Which Will Cure Breast…

It's October! You know what that means — candy shelves overstuffed with fun sized candy bars, sweaters and boots and tights and scarves in Gap commercials — and everywhere you turn, pink crap for sale under the guise that buying it means that you're promoting Awareness® of Breast Cancer. Thing is, not only is most of… » 10/03/12 1:25pm 10/03/12 1:25pm